Twilight Ninja
by eduk
Summary: Permanently cut OFF from his past, Naruto Namikaze finds out the hard way. That NO matter how much you want something, sometimes you must let go. Now alone and starting along the path of Immortality. How will the Blonde fare when faced with a strange New World, complete with New Challenges? Naru / Bella Cullen. Bella is the Vampire, NO Edward. Cullen Clan norm cples.
1. Ninja Intro, The Path To Twilight

_**Disclaimer.**_

_**I do not own Twilight or Naruto and DO **__**NOT**__** claim to. This is just a fun idea I came up with, that I thought would be cool. So I am going to write it. Any elements that are mine in this story, can be used by anybody as long as you make them look **__**COOL**__**.**_

* * *

**Ninja Intro, The Road To Twilight****.**

_Present Time._

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze was a solider, warrior and weapon of unparalleled skill, power and cunning. The young man had faced down threats & dangers that most adults could not even begin to imagine in their wildest dreams or darkest nightmares. As such even those that were closest to the Blonde had to admit, that when it came to the weird, wonderful, scary, crazy, unusual, mythical and extremely dangerous. Naruto Namikaze had not only gotten the T-shirt, but also handmade it stich by stich. Enemy Shinobi, Monsters, Demons, Gods and Foes of such power they could destroy a Continent in the blink of an eye, were considered the norm for the Blonde Ninja.

So when our Hero entered that final battle of the Fourth Great Shinobi War against the most powerful force the Universe itself had ever seen, Naruto didn't even bat an eyelash. No he did what he was trained to do and met it head-on to protect his friends, like all those other times before. Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze may only be 17 years old by most normal circumstance and measurable means, but the Blonde had always been far from normal. After all he had fooled an entire Ninja Village into believing that he was a bright orange jumpsuit wearing idiot and ramen junkie.

Unknown to all but a few Naruto Uzumaki was never the Dead Last idiot, with an unhealthy ramen addiction that the Leaf Village had thought him to be. Well OK he admitted to himself he was a serious ramen junkie, but never an idiot no sir. There was a reason WHY he had failed the Graduation Test three times in a row. Beside the Civilian Council trying to shaft him on a daily basis, the Teachers sabotaging his training and those very same Teachers miss marking his tests. Naruto Namikaze had already passed it and became a Ninja at the age of 5. After a longer than normal stint inside an organisation that does not exist (Cough ANBU Cough), the Blonde had seen & done things that most could not even begin to imagine by the age of 12.

However the warrior was about to embark on his greatest challenge to date and to be perfectly honest with himself, the Blonde wasn't even sure he could survive this time. Naruto Namikaze stood in front of a building, about to enter a place that he thought he would never have to enter again. It was a school and not just any school, **HIGH SCHOOL**. An involuntary shudder rippled down the Ninja's spine, along with a dark sinister chuckle inside his head.

Naruto who was presently inside his mind, sitting atop of the Great Nine Tailed Fox closed his fist and bashed the highly amused Chakra Demon on the head.

The Nine Tails growled, as his eyes fixed upon his Vessel. **"****KID**** I thought you wanted to keep a ****LOW**** profile in this world? You and I throwing down here in front of this place, is going to draw a ****LOT**** of attention. Well from what is left of it and those who are still alive after we have finished anyway."** The Fox drew back its muzzle to expose a giant set of razor-sharp teeth.

Naruto calmly stood up and walked to the tip of the foxes nose, then spun around to look him straight in the eyes. Blue eyes narrowed as they met the gaze of red. "YOU are enjoying this aren't you?" He said accusingly, as he pointed a shaky finger towards his furry companion.

The foxes muzzle raised even more, as another deep sinister chuckle left his throat. **"Well what can I say? Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze, the man the GODS themselves once nicked named ****O FUCK!**** Is scared of going back to school." ** The Chakra Demon didn't even try to hide his amusement, as his sharp teeth parted and laughter filled the cave that had become his home inside Naruto's mind.

Naruto's eyebrow began to twitch uncontrollably, as he ground his teeth together. "This is **NOT** funny you dam walking carpet!"

The laughter only increased as Naruto was still wondering just HOW he had gotten himself into this situation, as his furry pain in the ASS began to role about the cave floor in hysterics. Just before the Ninja was crushed in the foxes moment of amusement, the Blonde back flipped off the Demons nose and began to think back to just exactly **HOW** this had happened.

* * *

_Storyline Flashback._

* * *

It all started a little under a year ago for the Blonde Ninja, Naruto Namikaze had just caught up with Sasuke Uchiha. Sasuke hell-bent on revenge over what had happened to his clan and the fact that once more Naruto had surpassed him over & over again, had tried to destroy the Leaf Village in a final battle. Under the pretence of helping Obito Uchiha achieve his goal of World Domination, Sasuke betrayed him at the last moment switching places with him, to become the Vessel for the Great Ten Tails Chakra Demon. Sasuke Uchiha had intended to trap the world inside his own **Sharingan**, and thus restore his clan to their former glory.

However unknown to Sasuke Uchiha, Naruto Uzumaki had always been holding back against the arrogant prick since the first day they had met. Naruto Namikaze was the living legacy of the Fourth Hokage and sole heir to the Senju, Uzumaki and Namikaze clans. While most assumed he had only discovered that connection recently, as with all ninja the truth was far more than that.

Naruto was never raised with love & kindness, he never liked to think back on those dark times if he could avoid it. The Leaf Shinobi treated him with mistrust and the Civilians treated him with hatred. The Villagers never treated him as human, let alone as an innocent child. They saw Naruto Uzumaki and the Nine Tailed Fox as one and the same. So in order to protect himself from the hate, lies, conspiracies and enemies that surrounded himself, Naruto Namikaze came up with his Naruto Uzumaki mask. The mask of the prank loving, ramen junkie and dead last of the Leaf Village. After all just who would be afraid of a weak Demon, that screamed loudly and wears bright orange?

To those in the know like the Third Hokage, Tsunade Senju, Jiraiya and Kakashi Hatake. Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze was a genius & prodigy, that outshone all those that came before him. The reason that Kakashi never taught him anything in his genin days, was because he had already taught it to Naruto when he was his ANBU captain. Yep that's right the village prankster was a member of the Leaf Villages ANBU. The best of the best, the elite of the elite, who undertook all covert operations for the Hokage personally. All the while Naruto Uzumaki wore his "mask" at the Shinobi Academy, Naruto Namikaze was wearing the ANBU mask of "FOX" and moving in the shadows making a fearsome name & reputation for it.

Naruto Namikaze had actually hung up his ANBU mask, that final year when Iruka Umino took over teaching at the academy. The Blonde had decided to finally graduate, in order to openly achieve his goal & dream of recognition. So having a field promotion (Mizuki Incident) and a "supposed look" at the **Forbidden Scroll**, Naruto Uzumaki joined the regular Shinobi Forces with his **Shadow Clone Jutsu** specialty useable. Over the following year the Blonde had a "Moment or Two" of inspiration, in the many battles he faced and improved rapidly. The cover story of a training trip with Jiraiya (while they went to the Mist Village and joined the rebels) gave Naruto Namikaze upon his return, the opportunity to show more of his true self. Add into the mix the **Shadow Clone** training method that Kakashi "came up" with. All meant that the Fourth Hokage's legacy could step out of the shadows slowly, without drawing suspicion that just maybe he had known the truth all along.

So in that final battle when Sasuke Uchiha was using his **Mangekyou Sharingan** and with Obito Uchiha using his **Mangekyou Sharingan**, Naruto appeared in-between the two and activated his Fathers **Dimensional Bridge Jutsu**. Unfortunately for the Blonde his plan backfired spectacularly, when the **THREE** Jutsu collided. Naruto had no choice in that moment and teleported using his own variation of the Fourth Hokage's **Flying Thunder God**, his own **Flying Storm God**. Naruto appeared on the other end of nowhere over a thousand feet into the air, as he plummeted back to earth with a truly supersonic rate of speed. All Naruto could do at the time, was to follow Kurama's piece of advice and to tuck, duck and roll.

* * *

_Ground Zero 1 Year Ago._

In the dead of night, deep within a strange forest in the middle of nowhere. A crash crater of over a hundred ft. across was smouldering. At its very centre a charred mound of flesh, began to twitch back to life.

Coughing up blood, the lump said only one word. "OOOOOOUUUUUUUCCCCCCHHHHHHHHH."

A booming voice shouted out. _**"Easy Kid just breathe slowly, that was one **__**HELL**__** of a hit you have just taken."**_

The charred & broken lump winced. "Keep it down Kurama, it feels like my head was split in fucking two. By the way do you hear that ringing? And just what the **HELL** hit me?" Naruto began to take stock of the situation.

The Nine Tails chuckled in relief, as he answered. _**"A **__**PLANET**__** Naruto, either you hit **__**IT**__** or **__**IT**__** hit you. Either way you both defiantly left your marks on one another. As for the ringing, pain, headache and the smell of cooked flesh? That's what you get for doing the most stupid fucking thing, that you have ever done in your life. And you **__**KNOW**__** that's actually saying something! What the **__**HELL**__** were you thinking, when you opened up that rift into oblivion? Do you have any idea at just how lucky you are to be alive right now?"**_ The Blonde could feel, just how pissed Kurama was at the moment.

Spitting out a glob of blood from the back of his throat, the Blonde answered. "Right now I don't feel to fucking lucky to be alive. I feel pain, lots and lots of pain. Oh yes I am going to feel this one in the morning." The Nine Tails anger began to rise, filling the Blonde with adrenalin. Wincing as he began to sit up, Naruto decided to cut off the tirade before it began. "I was thinking **O ****FUCK** end of the Universe here. Sasuke had just used **Infinite Tsukuyomi **to try and mind-fuck the world into submission. Obito tried to use **Kamui **to take the Ten Tails away from Sasuke and the two Jutsu collided creating that hole which then began to pull everything into it. So I cut open the Rift into the VOID, so I could send whatever the fuck the Uchiha pink-eye had created into oblivion. Taking the Ten Tails and those two back stabbing fucking bastards with it." The Blonde tried to move his arms, but only his right moved.

Kurama snorted sarcastically. _**"Yea you tuck fuck up ONE, and made it even **__**BIGGER**__** with fuck up **__**TWO**__**. Fuck up two then pulled us in along with the Uchiha. I told you that not even the Old Man was crazy enough to use the VOID to banish the Ten Tails. That's why he imprisoned it, inside the Sealing Stone that became the moon. According to the Legends about the VOID, anything that gets cast into it ceases to exist! I don't just mean **__**DIE**__** and move on to the next world, I mean gone from all fucking creation. As in no return, no ghost, no sprit, no soul, no Demon, no God, no fucking thing can survive once inside. Because all of creation itself ceases to exist there into nothing, **__**AKA OBLIVION!**__**" **_ The Blonde chuckled weakly as he winced at the pain in his arm.

Looking down and taking hold of his left wrist, Naruto braced himself as he gave a short sharp pull snapping his bones back into place. Biting back the howl of pain, the Blonde gave his retort. "You know my saying Furball. If you are going to do something properly, then do it **RIGHT!**" Flexing his fingers to gets some feeling other than pain back into them, Naruto looked down at his legs and winced. Seeing bones sticking out above his left knee and just below his right ankle. Naruto began the process of snapping and realigning his broken body back into some sort of recognisable shape. Shaking his head like a dog trying to rid itself of water, the Blonde spoke. "How bad is the damage on the inside?"

The Tailed Beast snorted as he answered. _**"You have got a punctured lung on the left, a collapsed one on the right and your heart stopped for a while. That's not to mention the damage to your spine, stomach, kidneys and the less said about the brain injuries the better. You have got burns over most of your skin, along with internal bleeding from your liver. If it wasn't for the fact we merged Life-force and your healing ability got jacked up then you would be dead. I managed to jumpstart your heart, don't ask how long it stopped I honestly don't know. I would say you have about ten minutes before you past out again if that."**_ Willing the energy from somewhere, Naruto began to shakily stand up. Surprised the voice roared. _**"What the FUCK **__**KID!**__** You did just hear what I told you right? You are about to pass out at any moment!"**_

Gritting his teeth Naruto jerked to the left snapping his spine back into place. "Yea I know but there is no one else here. Like you said, we don't know how long I was out of it for. It could be hours or even days, so where are the others?" Naruto looked around the crater that was still smouldering, as he began to slowly make his way up the bank. "They should be here with us. Which means that either I was only out of it for a couple of minutes so they haven't caught up yet, or we are no were fucking near where we should be. I did after all teleport without using a target marker. So this could be any fucking where in the Elemental Nations. Not to mention the fact that we were fighting near the Fire / Earth Nations border. I don't know about you, but I have no intention of waiting around for some jackass to find me and then decide to settle a score over Kami knows what, from Kami knows when." Already picturing the mental nod of his furry pain in the ass, Naruto climbed out the crater he had just awoke in. "I can't feel anything from my Chakra right now meaning I'm running on empty here. I'm in no shape to fight and I'm sure that meteor impression I just did was probably seen by someone. I don't intend to stick around here and find out whether it was a friend or foe, when I can barely see straight or even stand." The Blonde digging deep, pushed the pain away and began to crawl forward.

The Nine Tails however was shaking his head at his Vessel, not nodding in agreement. _**"Kid you just opened up the impossible, threw the mother of all Gods into it, then collapsed the tunnel onto yourself before pulling another miracle out of your ass. Of course you are running on empty smartass. Although you do have a good point, about the wrong person finding you in your present state. So what's your plan Naruto?"**_

The Blonde shakily got to his feet and continued forward. "How long will it take for me to patch up?"

Kurama gave his honest answer. _**"Based on your injuries and Chakra level, just who the fuck knows? What I am a doctor? You're the one with the Medical Training, not me."**_

Gritting his teeth, Naruto bit back his retort. "No but I am using your Healing Ability right know, so how fucking long should it take me to get back up on my feet?"

The Nine Tails snorted and answered. _**"Kid you never cease to amaze me how stubborn you truly are. You are seriously lucky to be alive right now Naruto. Like I said you just did the impossible once again, **__**THREE**__** times in a row. Because of that your Chakra level is down to less than **__**FIVE**__** per cent. You are practically on the verge of Extreme Chakra Exhaustion right now. Your Healing will increase with the more Chakra available to you. My advice would be to stop and rest to let your reserves build back up so your body can heal."**_

The Ninja grunted. "So the original plan of finding somewhere to hide, before I pass out it is then. Do me a favour though and keep your voice down. Seriously my head feels like someone stuck a Kunai straight through the base of my skull. As for the ringing it …." Naruto paused in the darkness, as a strange rumbling sound filled his ears. "Can you hear that Kurama?"

The alert Demon answered. _**"Yea Kid that sound is real! I've got no idea what it is though."**_ Immediately the Blonde warrior began to search for the source of this possible threat. As on the horizon TWO lights suddenly appeared out of nowhere and approached rapidly. With the strange site almost upon the weary and very confused Blonde, Kurama roared into Naruto's skull. _**"ROLL LEFT KID, **__**NOW!**__**"**_ Using the battle reflex honed into his muscles, the former ANBU dived.

Unfortunately given his current state and pitch-black darkness, both Naruto & Kurama were unaware of the cliff face they were currently standing on. The broken & charred lump began to roll down the side of a mountain, as the Ninja's body was struck repeatedly again and again. After falling once more for what felt like an eternity for the battle weary Blonde, he came to a final end by smashing into a large rock and rolling into a ditch.

Once more coughing up a glob of blood from the back of his throat, Naruto spoke. "OOOOOOUUUUUUUCCCCCCHHHHHHHHH." Finally passing out.

* * *

_Storyline Flashback._

* * *

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze awoke inside that ditch very sore, dazed and confused about what the hell had just happened. Kurama's review monologue of Planet 2 - Naruto Namikaze 0, did nothing to pacify or soothe that raging headache that the Blonde could now fully appreciate. Having no idea how long he was actually out of it for, the Blonde popped a couple of Chakra & Blood pills and began to get his bearings.

The Ninja began looking around himself now that his vision had been mostly restored, having absolutely no idea where he actually was. However being surrounded by this much forest, Naruto had hoped he was still inside the Fire Nation somewhere. So hauling ass to the nearest "Village" he could find or that he had hoped was the Leaf, the Blonde got a very unwelcome surprise. The moment Naruto Namikaze saw the strange buildings & machines, the Ninja knew that he was no longer in Kansas. The Blonde immediately placed one of his **Seal Markers **just outside the town called Forks, then headed back into the forest so he could work out just what in the hell was going on.

When the Ninja was about to start throwing some Jutsu around to get some answers, Kurama told him not to and explained to his Vessel what had happened. Apparently somehow though Kurama had no idea just how, the Blonde Ninja had found himself in a different dimension. Naruto Namikaze after going over his own knowledge about Time / Space Ninjutsu inside his mind, came to one realisation. That his was stuck in this strange new world, until he could figure out a way to get back to the Leaf Village or even if he ever could. The hits kept on coming when Kurama told Naruto, that because he was in a different world, his ability to Mold Chakra was now affected.

As it turns out Chakra when used, interacts with the Physical World around the user by pushing against it. In the World Of The Shinobi after thousands of years with Chakra users, the world itself was more resilient. Basically it pushed back against the Chakra user, whenever they wielded any Jutsu. In this New World that resistance was no longer there anymore, so **ALL** the Ninja's Jutsu & Abilities would be overpowered considerably. Translation he was back to having Chakra Control worse than that of a new born baby. Even more was the fact that Naruto & Kurama had merged Life-force shortly before hand, which now put the Blondes current Chakra Capacity & Reserves into the level of a God.

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze was now looking at years of retraining, before he would be able to use any of his Jutsu & Abilities to anywhere near the same level he was known for as Gold Fox of the Leaf Village. The Blonde Ninja gave a long string of curses, when he tried and failed to perform a simple **Replacement Jutsu**. Until he got his Shinobi Abilities back, the Fourth Hokage Legacy was well and truly stuck in this New World. There was one bit of luck on Naruto's side though. After a quick run-through of his Ninja Abilities & Jutsu, the Shinobi found out he could still use his **Shadow Transformation Jutsu** and his **Shadow Clone Jutsu**.

So while the young Ninja cleaned himself up at a lakeside, and finished running through his current supply situation. The Blonde began to decide upon his best plan of action for the future.

Because Naruto entered this New World at this location, it was here that his best chance of getting back to his own world lay. However a stranger spotted around the town would probably draw too much attention and the warrior had no idea how this world worked or what kind of threats there were. Entering his ANBU mind state, he began to analyse the situation and quickly came up with a plan of action.

Leave the immediate area and gather as much information about this world & culture as he could as fast as possible, then return here later and blend in while he tried to find some way back to the Leaf Village.

Some Ninja where born Sensor Types, with the ability to detect something that normal means never could or simply overlooked. Examples of this would be a Doujutsu Clan like the Hyuga or Uchiha and animal Clans like the Inuzuka or Aburame, who entered Soul Pacts with a Primal Animal Sprit. Naruto Namikaze always had the ability to know things about other people, that he could never truly explain. He could tell when someone was lying, what they were feeling and even their intentions behind a word or action. A feeling in his **GUT** that could not be categorised or defined as anything other than intuition. However when he began Sage Training under the Toads, it soon developed as he began to open his core existence to the World around him. Later when Naruto & Kurama merged Life-force, it became even sharper to something that rivalled empathy but went so far beyond that and into to a point where words no longer existed for it. Added to the fact that he shared his normal senses with a Fox, meant a Sensor Ability & Awareness of his surroundings that was second to none and completely unique. The more Chakra he put into it, the further the range he could detect until distance became meaningless. It was a VERY useful & powerful Skill to have as a Ninja, which was a hazardous profession at the best of times.

So the Chakra Sensor now that his headache & double vision had finally cleared up, felt outwards for the largest populated area he could find. The Blonde had already marked the town of Forks with one of his teleport markers. Although his Chakra Control was shot and he could not use his **Flying Storm God Jutsu**, the Blonde could still detect his Seal Markers over any distance. So finding ground zero or the town again in the future, would not be a problem not matter how far he wondered. So Naruto headed off into this New World, towards the largest reading of life he could sense in the surrounding area. It was always easier to hide in a larger crowd, than a smaller one. Later that day the Blonde arrived at a city called Seattle, which Naruto had to admit was perfect for his immediate needs.

The Ninja stayed in the surrounding countryside living off the land, while working on getting his Shinobi Abilities back up to scratch. Being alone and defenceless in a strange new world, went against the grain for the young warrior. While he was doing this, Naruto routinely sent waves of **Transformed Shadow Clones** into the city, to learn all they could about the local population and what was the norm here.

After TWO months the genius & prodigy managed to learn the local language, along with the personal habits & culture of the population of this world. A large portion of its history, sciences and technologies, which Naruto had to admit were very fascinating to him. The Blonde genius also had to admit that he was curious as to why the level of technology was so high here, when compared to his own and couldn't wait to get his hands on a car or motorbike. At one point though Naruto Uzumaki had thought he died in that **FUCK UP** that brought him here and that it sent him straight to **HELL**. When the Blonde junkie found out that there was no such thing as ramen here.

Learning more each day and getting comfortable with his current surroundings. Naruto began to journey into Seattle daily, in order to put his long-term plans into motion. He needed to create an identity here that would keep him under the radar.

From experience in his days as a member of ANBU, along with his traveling with Jiraiya, Naruto knew exactly want he needed and where to get it. First he needed cash, then he needed a cover identity and finally he needed a place to live along with some transport, as outrunning a train here would defiantly stand out. Naruto's skill set had been restored to the point (Chunin) that the Blonde could accomplish this with very little problems. Obviously he could not get these things legally and had read enough about the history of humans here, to know his ass would be strapped down inside Area 51 if the government ever found out about him. Having no desire to be on the receiving end of an Anal Probe delivered by men in black suits, legal means was most defiantly out. That meant criminal gangs and black-markets were the best & safest place for him to look.

In all honesty Naruto preferred this method and it actually felt like home to him for the first time in months. The Blonde had done so many missions in the underworld of the Ninja that it felt like just like old times. If you knew where to look and how to ask, you could get your hands on anything within certain circles. That was after all the number one reason that the Ninja had gone to a larger population.

Lots of people equals lots of money, money equals greed, greed equals crime, crime equals vice, vice equals scumbags, scumbags equals untraceable cash.

The former ANBU had perfected several disguises using his **Shadow Transformation Jutsu**, so even if he slipped there was minimal risk of exposure. First the Blonde needed to sort out some cash, after all money talks and without it you are boned. So Naruto had been watching the criminals on the streets of Seattle, to see what they were up to. Mostly there were drug dealers or pimps, the very dregs of society. Naruto Namikaze hated drug dealers with a passion as he had seen & felt first-hand through his Sensor Ability, just what that crap could do to people. So after he had identified the drug gangs that would not be missed, the Blonde began to liberate them of their cash and deal with that crap they sold ANBU style.

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze had several **ZERO** Tolerance Policies and just because he was in a different world, did not mean the Blonde was different. The former ANBU had already got a good portion of his Fuinjutsu skill back and relearned the **Corpse Destruction Jutsu**. So making these people along with their poison disappear, was not a great or very difficult problem. Naruto actually felt good about doing the community a service and after how easy it was, the Blonde began to wonder just **WHY** this world actually had a crime problem.

Next he needed to make contacts and for that he needed a big crowd & notoriety. It turns out that there is a healthy underground fighting club in Seattle, that moves from place to place. So Naruto got into a drunken bar fight with a well-known fighter and used his Drunken Fist Taijutsu to KO him in less than 60 seconds. Next night he was fighting in a winner takes all gauntlet (after betting on himself at a 1000 - 1 odds) and made a real killing. While Naruto Namikaze educated this New World about the finer points of a good bare fist cage fight, he had several of his **Transformed Shadow Clones** ask the right questions to the people watching in the crowds. Knowing the kind of clientele this type of event drew, the Young ANBU knew what to look for in the crowd of spectators. He soon began to build up a contacts list that would be able to help him with the right motivation.

After learning about this dimension Naruto had already come up with a list of people he needed to find, in order to create a few good identities that could keep him under the radar. Naruto needed a GOOD forger for Documents & ID, as he really had no idea yet how to make them himself. The Young Ninja had found out early, that without the right papers it would be almost impossible to get what he needed & keep it. He also needed to set up Bank Accounts, Credit Cards and such, because not many places used or took cash in this world. So he also needed to find a very GOOD lawyer.

While Naruto sat at his makeshift campsite that night, going over what he had learned from his **Shadow Clones** while counting his winnings he had an interesting idea. Why not combine both? Normally an ANBU would never put all their eggs into one basket, just in case someone breaks them. However there is also a lot more people watching those baskets just in case and in this New World Naruto was alone. Fewer people to keep his eye on for the long-term, meant less of a headache for the Blonde Ninja. So the following day Naruto went into Seattle to find the man whose name was at the top of both his lists, J Jenks Attorney At Law.

Naruto found the Jenks offices quite easily and broke in during the night. He placed several of his Spying Seals around the place and went through what was in the man's office. Next he went to the man's home delighted to find out that he had a family. Naruto Namikaze had a very STRICT **NO NO** List and would never harm a man's family. However the other guy never knew that and if you were going to motivate a man then you need the proper persuasion. While Naruto was at Jenks home he placed more of his Spying Seals around and took a couple of pictures of the Wife & Kids. One or two were while the family slept soundly in their beds for good measure. For the next 2 weeks Naruto had his **Shadow Clones** monitor the Seals, while he went and made contact with other names on his lists. To get a better idea of just how the black-market worked here, for his future meeting with Jenks. After a solid month of prep work, research into identities, a lot of Intel gathering on the man's Home, Business Profession and Offices. Naruto Namikaze was ready to introduce himself to his new best friend & business partner.

* * *

_Seattle Flashback 3 Months After Ground Zero._

J Jenks was sitting in his office and was having a very nice day. He had threatened a couple of people, made quite a bit of money and had not met Priority Client Number One. For Jenks life could not get any sweeter and he had just sent his secretary April home for the day. Just as he was about to switch the lights off in his office everything suddenly went black. Jenks awoke to be in a forest surrounded by dead bodies everywhere, the man literally vomited from the smell of decaying flesh. Then a feeling that he had never felt before, hit Jenks head-on like a ten ton freight train. He was going to die, there was something near him that wanted to kill him with all its being. Freaking out of his mind Jenks began to shakily look around, as his eyes landed on a man wearing a strange outfit. Armed with a sword and wearing the most scary looking mask Jenks had ever seen, the man moved forward until he was standing above him. Jenks knew deep down in his very soul, that if he so much as twitched this man would chop his head off like all the other corpses around him. The man in a calm voice, told him to look at him and not turn away as he revealed his face from behind the mask. The next thing Jenks knew everything went black again and he woke up back in his office. The feeling of death was still all around him but what was worse, was that same man who had just killed all those people was sitting calmly in the chair on the other side of his desk. J Jenks Attorney at law met Priority Client Number **TWO** that day.

A month later a very happy Naruto Namikaze left the offices of his new Business Partner with **TEN** ironclad new Identities, along with Credit Cards and the such. Jenks was now properly motivated and if anyone mentioned the name of **Shadow**, the poor bastard would jump 10 feet into the air. As Naruto & Kurama were amusing themselves about what they could do to Jenks next a sudden & violent shudder went down both theirs spines, along with a foreboding sense of DOOM. Surely there was not someone out there that knew Jenks personally and pitied him whenever someone scared him to the point of death and held him there, was there? Naruto quickly decided that just in case he would pull it back a little in the future. After all with his luck there probably was and sooner or later he would have to answer to them for it.

* * *

_Storyline Flashback._

* * *

So after 4 months Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze had a good understanding of how this New World worked. Several identities to use just in case One or Two of them got burned, access to cash & funds so that he could support those identities. A very **MOTIVATED** go to guy for his Legal needs and a significant portion of his Ninja Skills & Abilities restored. However the Blonde had hit a slight snag when it came to that, as more hits kept on coming.

Naruto was attempting to re-master the basics of Elemental Chakra Manipulation for his Wind affinity. Placing a Leaf on his palm and using his Chakra to create a blade to cut it into two. To his surprise the Leaf cut on his first attempt but the snag was that instead of ONLY cutting the Leaf, the blade of Wind continued into the forest and sliced a 50 foot sloth straight through the trees. Sighing at how overpowered he was Naruto realised that when it came to his more powerful skills, he would have to practice those in the most remote regions in this world to avoid attention. So Naruto got out a Map of the world and broke into the Library he had been studying in at night with his **Shadow Clones**.

Naruto had long decided that GOOGLE was indeed the greatest tool for a Ninja when it came to information gathering that he had ever seen. Type in what you want and you can research anything you need. So Naruto picked several of the most remote & harshest environments known to this world and set about getting to them. Although his Chakra Control was nowhere near the level to use his **Flying Storm God** in battle yet, he had gotten to the point that basic Teleportation was now possible. So creating his modified **Shadow Clones** and adding his special **Chakra Battery Seals** to them. Naruto sent them off into the world, to begin marking places with his Seal Markers so he could Teleport to them. After another Month the Blonde Ninja had marked all the capital cities in this New World, along with all those places best suited to his needs of isolation and minimal risk of exposure or mass property damage.

By this time though, the Naruto Uzumaki in him was getting more anxious day by day. After living in the countryside for months, it was getting to the point now that the guy was forgetting what a soft bed felt like or what a proper cooked meal tasted like. Also to be perfectly honest with himself he had not taken to Ramen withdrawal very well, no sir not well at all. Unless he solved that or found a **VERY** good substitute, then the amount of time before the Nine Tailed Fox Demon went on a rampage in this world was limited at best. So the blonde began to put his third stage and long-term goals into place. He needed a permanent base of operations so he could setup shop and unload his gear that he had sealed onto his body.

Naruto Namikaze had always known the value of money. After all when you have only an orphans allowance to live off and people charge you triple prices for rotten food, you quickly learn the value of a buck. Working out the sort of cash he needed to fund a home here was a surprise for the blonde, in this New World money was defiantly power. With his community service work he had done already and the Taijutsu demonstrations in the fight clubs, Naruto was now sitting on about 2 million. Ironically he had a lot more than that Sealed on him, but this world didn't take Ryo. So he needed to increase his cash supply significantly & immediately. So the Young Ninja decided to call upon his number one ally when it came to money, his LUCK.

In normal day to day mission life as a Ninja, Naruto Uzumaki's luck sucked worse than that of Tsunade's Senju's the Legendary Sucker. Any mission his was given was guaranteed to be bumped up at least 3 levels. So after the ferret incident and the foiled Continent Invasion, the Fifth Hokage Tsunade just decided to give the Blonde suicide missions after that. However to all things in nature there must be a balance and when it came to gambling however, Naruto Uzumaki's luck was the most feared thing in every casino and game house that the Blonde ever visited. So the young Ninja got on a plane while his **Shadow Clones** were off marking the World and went to Sin City Las Vegas. A disguised Naruto Uzumaki left a month later, after receiving a LIFETIME BAN in every casino or underground card game in the State Of Nevada.

Naruto took his new found wealth to his go to guy and to his delight after Jenks landed from his 10 foot jump, discovered the man also did Banking & Brokering. Naruto didn't ask where Jenks got his Stock & Investment tips, but they did do very well for the young Blonde. So with the aid of his go to guy, Naruto began to buy properties around the world in different places under the identities that Jenks had made for him. Jenks even set it up so that if one of those identities "DIED" then another would inherit the estate, Jenks called it a Will. When Naruto smiled & released a small amount of Killing Intent upon the man, asking if Jenks own personal Will was up to date just in case. The poor bastard started to jump 20 feet into the air at the name of **Shadow** and started to talk about retirement. To which Naruto Namikaze made it Crystal Clear that would not happen until **HE** personally said so.

It was just after his Sixth month in this New World that he turned his full attention back to Forks. Naruto had just gotten his **Rasengan** back into action, without the worry of destroying everything in a One Mile Radius around himself by accident. The reason for the time delay was that Forks was a small community and given human nature, that meant everyone knew everything about each other. So scrutiny on a person's life was always high and every small thing that happened in town like that was always under the microscope. The best place to hide was always out in the open, but it was also the most dangerous place too. Infiltration was a subtle Art, even for a Master of it like Naruto and the true skill was in the detail.

So Naruto took a look at the properties available to buy in the area around the town. He found the perfect place out in the middle of nowhere 20 miles away from the town centre. A rundown Mansion, that was in the middle of the forests that surrounded the area. The place was perfect to continue his training on a small scale unnoticed and had plenty of animals & stuff in the surrounding land to hunt that Kurama would be happy. Next he went to his go to Guy to create his living identity and cover story for the long-term. After he had scrapped Jenks of the ceiling, he told the man what he wanted and where. Naruto made sure **HE** emphasized to Jenks, that if there was so much as a dot missing or an I out of place with this new identity, then the man would find himself a HEAD shorter. After doing the deal and setting himself up as Naruto Namikaze the 17 year old orphan with a trust fund, the Blonde brought his new home.

Naruto immediately began by setting up a perimeter around his new Mansion using his Fuinjutsu Skills. Using his Skills and extensive knowledge of the Art, the Blonde Ninja created a complex Seal Array that consisted of Barriers, Detection, Genjutsu Concealment and a complex Summoning Seal Arrays that only a prodigal Uzumaki Fuinjutsu master could. Happy that his location was now completely secure, Naruto turned to the property itself. When he brought the place, he got it for a tenth of what it was actually worth. The Mansion was a broken down wreck, that would take years to repair & rebuild. Luckily Naruto had a personal army of skilled workers that worked for free, so he got to work. He completely tore the place down to the bedrock, well actually he used the **Rasengan** on a wall and that was it. After he cleared the crater Naruto began to use Earth Jutsu to create an Underground Base. Next he fortified the foundations underneath the entire area and built his New Home.

It was not a modest place by any means, Naruto had lived in a crappy apartment building most of his life, so he liked the idea of a bit of room for his interests. So after a month of ordering & building Naruto Namikaze was now the proud owner of a 3 floor mansion. Complete with 3 master bedrooms & on suite bathrooms, 2 libraries, music room/studio, games room, office, living room, dining room, well stocked & equipped kitchen, swimming pool complete with Jacuzzi and a 10 car indoor garage complete with workshop. Underneath which could only be accessed by a secret entrance inside the Mansion was his Ninja base of operations. Complete with training dojo, Jutsu library, Clan library, Armoury, research materials and his personal possessions that he brought with him into this world.

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze was a Ninja born & bread, so that meant he never truly trusted anyone even in his own Village. Kakashi always told him he was just being over paranoid, to which Naruto replied its hardly paranoia when they **ARE** out to get **YOU**. The Civilian Council, civilians and a large proportion of Ninja, at the time did after all want the young Blondes head on a pike and tried many times to put it there. The Leadership of the Leaf Village was no different, Homura, Koharu and most certainly Danzo would have loved nothing better than to get their hands on his families Wealth & Knowledge. In all honestly, Naruto Namikaze was never sure that the Third Hokage should not be included in that last list at times. So to protect his Clans legacy, Naruto had created a piece of Sealing Art that outshone and blew all attempts to seize or steal it out of the water. He took everything he owned, include the possessions from his Clans compounds, everything that his Mother & Father left for him and Sealed it into his own body. In the event of his death not only would the Nine Tailed Fox be released but EVERYTHING that belonged to the Senju, Uzumaki, Namikaze Clans would be destroyed too. Naruto always has a good chuckle when thinks back to the time he revealed that fact to the conspirators, who tried to keep it from him or steal it.

Hoverer there was a slight weakness & snag with that plan right now given his Chakra Control issues, as it required a truly insane amount of Chakra Control to use his **Storage Seal Matrix**. It was like trying to press a single key on a keyboard, using the world's smallest needle in order to release a single item. Problem was Naruto only had a sledgehammer with **VERY** little finesse at the moment and that meant all that was stored on him was out of reach until he got the required Skill Level back. Luckily he had placed a failsafe into the Seal Array BUT that was a full storage drop and it also destroyed the **Storage Seal Matrix**. Obviously unloading all of that which came in at around 30 tons of items in a single place, without being able to protect or move it was a bad idea. However Naruto needed access to his Clans Library of Knowledge & Jutsu, if he was going to be able to find a way back to the Leaf Village. The information in there was invaluable to him right now, particularly his Fathers personal notes on Time Space Manipulation. So now that the Ninja had a base to work from and a place where he could keep it all hidden & secure. Naruto unloaded his **Storage Seal Matrix** and took stock of all he had to work with, to get back to the Leaf Village.

* * *

_**It was NOT good****.**_

* * *

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze was known in the right circles as a master of Jutsu. The Gold Fox of the Leaf was known as the only man in History to surpass all the pervious Kage's that had ever lived in their chosen fields. His Knowledge on Jutsu was said to be second to none, especially in the fields of Fuinjutsu, Elemental Manipulation, Chakra Manipulation and Time Space Manipulation.

So all the time since the Blondes arrival in this New World, he had been going over in his head just exactly how he ended up here. He soon realised that getting back would be a problem when he could no longer feel his Seal Markers in the Elemental Nations. THAT was theoretically impossible because the signal so to speak, should have transcended Time & Space. The fact that he could **NOT** feel them, meant he had done more than just travel to a different world. Naruto did wonder how that was even possible, but soon realised that when the **THREE** Jutsu collided in that last battle Gravity, Space, Time and the very Physics of the area were rewritten. In essence the entire **FUCK UP** turned inside out, like taking off a T-Shirt with the logo ending up on the inside. Up became Down, Left became Right and IN became OUT.

The Namikaze Clan always put in their notes on Time Space Manipulation, that it would fry your brain like an egg if you studied it to deeply and after 6 months Naruto defiantly agreed to that wholeheartedly. He spent six months running through the math and crunching the numbers, to work out the level of Jutsu involved and discovered that there was simply no way back for him at least with his own knowledge. His only hope of return to the World Of Shinobi lay in his Clans Notes & Scrolls, those that had at least theorized something like this was even possible. Now having a safe place to unload them, Naruto had an army of **Shadow Clones** go over every scrap of paper until the final nail was struck home. He was stuck in this world forever, there was no going back.

Swallowing the very bitter pill that he would never see his friends again, Naruto began to wonder just what to do now?

Since his arrival here all his plans had focused on the goal of getting back to the Leaf Village. Certainly he had accepted the fact it could take years, but he had hoped that it was at least possible. Now he had to ask himself what now?

He already knew that he would have to say goodbye to those that he cared about already. Being an Uzumaki by blood, meant that he had a longer than normal lifespan. Baring illness or injury a Blood Uzumaki Clan member could live to an age of over 150. For Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze though, that had been blown out of the water when He and Kurama had merged their Life-force together and he became Immortal. The young Blonde would never age past Seventeen no matter how many years passed around him for others. A thousand, a million, he was going to be staying at the age of Seventeen forever.

Naruto wasn't even sure anymore, that there was a way to even kill him. After all the state he was in at Ground Zero had not killed him. Then later after a bad experience with a **Rasengan** when his Chakra Control sucked, the Blonde found out the extent of his new Healing Abilities as he had to re grow limbs. From what he had seen & learned through his unexpected experiment, was baring Head Decapitation he was all but Invincible. Especially in this New World were a Civilian from his own, would **WHOOP** most of those fighters when he had been cage fighting. He didn't even need to have to eat or sleep now ether, it was only necessary when he wanted to restore his Chakra Reserves after depleting them. However given the fact that Naruto now no longer used his **Shadow Clones** for training, as he was going for quality rather than quantity again he didn't really see a point when it came to sleep. After all whenever he tried to sleep all he had were nightmares, of the things he had done & seen during his Ninja career. He Father's journal always spoke of seeing the faces of the people he had killed during the Third Great Shinobi War in his dreams and Naruto defiantly understood that.

* * *

_Night Time Naruto's Mansion Flashback, Seven Months After Ground Zero._

* * *

Still he had hoped he could spend a lifetime with his friends before he had to move on, but unfortunately that was no longer possible. One of Naruto's hobbies was reading philosophy and when he realised that he was stuck here and his time their ended, he supposed that a lifetime was only a minute in forever.

The Ninja wasn't even sure that anyone he knew was alive anymore or if they were, they would be in there 50's by now. The reason was that Naruto had an answer to his question, about why the level of technology was so high here. This was because each world moved differently through time, a moment in one was longer in the other. It was like being transported into the future and the past at the same time. If the Blonde somehow managed to return to the World Of The Shinobi, he would arrive there at the same time point he left here. What the time factor was between the two Worlds the blonde had no idea, but at a best case scenario everything he cared about was now probably long gone. To greave at the loss of a loved one is one thing, but to greave at the loss of everything is something else entirely.

The Blonde was currently sitting on his balcony, looking up at the moon as his listened to the sounds of the forest. Thoughts of his friends passing through his mind, as he remembered back to his first confrontation with a fellow Jinchuuriki.

"_Why do I exist? I asked myself."_

Just behind Naruto a **Summoning Circle** appeared, as a Fox the size of a large horse appeared inside a plume of smoke. Kurama having listened to that last thought, looked to his friend. **"Having trouble sleeping again Kid?"** The Ninja didn't even bat an eyelash, as the Demon appeared out of thin air behind him.

Without looking at the Fox, Naruto answered. "Trouble sleeping **NO**, but dreaming yes. Now that its certain that I cannot go back, I'm just wondering about what to do next? You know Kurama I'm starting to feel like I'm running out of road, so sooner or later I will have to stop." The Blonde looked very heavy at that.

Kurama stood as he stretched his legs, and shuck out his coat. **"Naruto YOU have ****NEVER**** run away from anything in your life Kid. Given what you have faced up until now, ****THAT**** is actually saying something. Give it time Kid you never know what will happen in the future."** Naruto snorted at that.

The Blonde half smiled over his shoulder at the Fox, though he still looked heavy. "You know me Furball. The last time someone told me what my future held, I was supposed to die the next day. The time after that, I was supposed to be consumed by the Gods themselves. Then the next, then the next, like I have said before, my life has had many _**'Had To Be There Moments'**_. Anyone can change their future, it's their past that's set in stone." Being a master of Time / Space Ninjutsu, did give you knowledge and perspective about certain things after all.

Kurama standing at his full height over the Blonde, looked down at him as he spoke. **"You already know from experience, there is no way for you to go back Naruto only forward."**

Naruto looked towards the moon once more. "Like I said Kurama, I feel like I'm running out of road. For first time in my life, I actually have no idea about what to do next."

Kurama too had been giving this some thought and had wanted to ask questions. **"Kid I was thinking."**

Naruto Namikaze couldn't resist temptation at this and of course cut in. "Did it hurt?"

The Nine Tails had his pride and would never stoop as low as that. **"You're lucky I can't kill ****YOU**** Naruto, otherwise I would eat you for that."** The Blond sniggered to himself.

Naruto responded to the threat. "You **HAVE** already tried to bite me more than once Kurama. That's why I have this Furry Pain in the ASS, along with a serious headache at times."

The Nine Tailed Fox growled, though there was a smirk on his face. **"BETTER Kid MUCH ****BETTER****. No Smartass I was thinking about what you should do next. You know Naruto since you got here, your powers suddenly increased TEN ****FOLD****. Sure it's going to take you time to get it back under control, but when you do. ****KID**** in a world like this one, you will be a God amongst men. Hell you already are. You could do anything you wanted. Raise an army, raise an empire, conquer it, go any place you wanted to. Normally a person in your position would be going to town right now celebrating, not mopping around like you are."**

The Young Warrior snorted in response. "Kurama since when has anybody who knew me personally, ever thought of **ME** as normal?" The Fox was about to answer, but the Blonde cut him off. "That was a rhetorical question you dam walking carpet!" Kurama snickered, as Naruto huffed. "I have **NEVER **wanted or desired power, simply for powers sake. They say that a lifetime is a journey of discovery that teaches us the TRUTH about ourselves and our nature. With all those _**'Had To Be There Moments'**_ in my life, I have already learned the most important lesson there is first-hand. That there is a **BIG** fucking difference between what power IS and what power COSTS, the two are never equal. For this TEN FOLD power increase as you put it, I had to lose my ENTIRE WORLD KURAMA! EVERYTHING THAT I CARED ABOUT! My home, my family, my teachers, my friends, my village, my people, my WHOLE FUCKING WORLD **KURAMA**! As far as I am concerned that is a too HIGH OF A PRICE, for something that I **NEVER** wanted and doesn't mean **SQUAT** to me. My Name is Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze, **NOT** Naruto fucking Uchiha!" The Young's Blonde's tone was bitter at the end.

Kurama the Great Nine Tailed Fox placed a comforting paw on the Head of his Vessel. Just like he had watched Minato Namikaze do, all those years ago when Father and Son had first met. Silence between the two of them stretched in that moment. Kurama knew that the Blonde had not even begun yet to come to terms with all he had lost. To work his way through all the ways his life had truly changed over the last 2 years.

Taking a deep breath, Kurama spoke to his charge. **"****KID**** you know ****FULL**** well just what I meant when I said that. BUT you are right Naruto it is a steep price to pay for something that you didn't want."**

The Blonde looked up with a soft smile on his lips. "It isn't just steep Furball its Fucking **VERTICAL****.**" Both Blonde and Fox chuckled at that. "And before you ask, vertical is big word that means be careful what you wish for."

Kurama took his paw away & smiled down sadly. **"That is ****TRUE**** but you did wish for the strength to save your world Kid. This is the price for that power Naruto and someday you will have to come to terms with that." **Kurama settled down on his haunches beside Naruto, as they both looked out over the forest.

The Blonde looking down at his hands sighed & spoke. "You are wrong Kurama, I agreed to pay a different **price**. Not this one."

The Fox gave a sad smile to his friend. **"In the ****END**** Naruto it ****IS**** the same thing Kid. You already knew that before we ****ALL**** merged our Life-force, that as a member of the Uzumaki by blood you would have had to bury all those around you anyway at some point. Your friends and those you cared about Kid, could have spent the rest of ****THEIR**** lives with you, ****BUT**** you could not have stayed with them for the rest of ****YOURS**.**"**

Naruto looked up at his companion. _"_True Furball, that is indeed very true. **BUT** at least I would have seen with my own eyes the reason I made that choice in the first place. Watched as they lived, grew older, got married, had children, had grandchildren and I would have known how they lived their stories. You're right I would have had to say goodbye eventually, but at least I could have said that **GOODBYE** to them. That was the price I had agreed to pay Kurama, not this one. Now I have no idea that if in the end, all those choices I made, all those sacrifices I gave and all those things I went through really meant anything. But the worst part is that I will **NEVER** know one way or the other, if the price that my Family personally paid over the years was actually worth it."

Kurama too looked like that bothered him also, but then smiled at Naruto & spoke. **"****KID**** you made a believer out of even ****ME****. If you can do that then you can do anything. Besides those choices you made were to save them, do you really believe that what you taught the World of the Shinobi is truly gone from there?"**

Naruto Namikaze thought about all those lives he had personally touched over the years. "Probably not but at least I would have had the closure one way or the other."

Kurama snorted at that. **"Naruto you know full well that life has never given ****YOU**** quite what you asked for. Even so you have always found a way to pull through and when you bounce back you're always stronger than before. ****NOW**** just grow a pair and MAN ****UP**** like your Mother told you and ****DEAL**** with it."**

Naruto smiled at his Furry pain in the ass. "Look at you getting all Soft & Mushy on me in your old age Furball. You do know that having an identity crisis like that is a sign of Senility right? The next thing I know, **YOU** will be singing karaoke along with teen pop music on MTV." Kurama growled very embarrassed, as he remembered what Naruto had caught him doing. When the Nine Tails had first discovered the World of Cable Television.

Narrowing his eyes, the great Nine Tails growled menacingly in warning. **"We agreed ****NEVER**** to speak of that again and you gave me your ****WORD**** Naruto Namikaze. You are the Man with the ****NINDO**** of never going back on his word. You gave it and you ****WILL**** keep it dammit!"**

Naruto smiled up to his Furry pain in the ass. "About that little incident last month. **YOU** asked me to give you my word about that, **BUT** I never did and I never **WILL**. Quality blackmail material is hard to come by after all, unless you create it." The Fox looked away grumbling about how his Vessel had him by the balls and it just wasn't fair.

Hearing the snicker beside him, and the feeling of the current grip on his cargo tighten. Kurama wincing redirected his Tormentor err Friend. **"So what have come up with so far, about what you are going to do now?"**

Releasing his grip, the Blonde sighed & answered. "No matter what I do in the future Furball, I still need a place to call home and lay low. A Sleepy Town like this in the middle of nowhere is perfect for that. When I enter **Sage Mediation** here, there is a good vibe in the air here that soothes me greatly for some reason. Of all the other places that I have been in this World, no other place comes close to this. The Vibe of Nature here is pretty good, when you Listen & Feel it with your Soul. We all need our places to Heal at times and call Home, this is as good as any I have found so far. Plus it has everything I need, in order to regain my Ninja Abilities & Skill Sets. First Hundreds Of Miles of wide open spaces and variable terrains to train in and get a reasonable workout on a daily basis. Second the area has a small population in relation to other Towns this size. Which means I don't have to worry too much about being overwhelmed from others, when I crack open my **Chakra Limiters** and go Full Power. Third it gives me the chance to interact with people from this World, at a limited level of my own choosing. Having a small population I can use to sharpen my Skills back up to scratch on, will help me in the long-term no matter how I decide to live in this world. So the plan for now is to stay here and keep myself under the radar for the time being. Maybe even start a couple of projects up to occupy my time, after all that's all I have left now." The Blonde looked heavy once more.

"**So you are going to spend the rest of eternity, trying to crack the Ichiraku's 625 Spice Special Ramen recipe?"** Kurama froze as he realised, he had just used the Taboo Word. Blonde was now currently curled up in a ball, slowly rocking himself back and fourth. Mumbling something about one day at a time and maybe tomorrow will be the day he finds the Devils stash of Sacred Noodles. Immediately Kurama was on his feet, towering over the Blonde. **"NARUTO ****SNAP**** OUT OF ****IT****! Don't make me wail your ****ASS**** again!"** The Demons patience was limited on certain topics.

The Ramen Junkie, wiping a tear away spoke. "Which one do you think did it Kurama? Seriously which one of those cruel bastards upstairs cast me into this purgatory? The purgatory of a barren wasteland without the Sacred Noodle and populated with Fan Girls."

The Fox sighed as he answered. **"****KID**** for the last time we are not in Purgatory, no way no how. ****MAYBE**** one of them was responsible for nudging you in this general direction so to speak but that's ****IT****!" **The Nine Tails was happy to get the addict back on track quickly. Kurama walked forward again, as he stood once more next to the Ninja. **"And the truth?"** Blonde looked to his companion with a raised eyebrow and Kurama answered the unasked question. **"The Old Man used to say that understanding is a ****THREE**** edged sword. There is ****YOUR**** side, ****THEIR**** side and the ****POINT**** of truth. So what is the point of truth then?"**

At this Naruto Namikaze looked very heavy. "The reason Gaara got the wrong answer in the beginning, was because he asked the wrong question. The true question is not why do I exist? It is why do I want to live? For years I wanted to purge away the corruption, which had begun to rot away the Great Tree that was my home. People like Danzo that called themselves patriots, simply because they knew what the greater good for everyone else was. When in reality every action that fucker took, went against everything that the Leaf Village was built on and believed in. The very Village which was the dream of all my ancestors, going all the way back to the beginning with the **Sage Of The Six Paths**. The dream that one day, people would be able to look past their differences and unite under one banner in the hopes of a better future. Many of my Family & Ancestors had given sacrifice upon sacrifice, including their very lives to create that dream in a physical form. Seeing Danzo along with all those other useless fuckers almost destroy that, was the reason I chose to live. To choose to live and protect that dream, from the very nightmare that is was created to banish. The truth is Kurama that now when I sleep, I no longer see dreams just nightmares. Even now when I'm awake, I have nothing to dream for in the future. Sure I have a few thoughts about what I will do tomorrow and the next day, but that's facts & figures not life. Training and regaining my abilities like I am is one thing, but then what to do with them or myself is another. Power without perception is meaningless and perception without power is just as futile. So in the end what is the answer to the question of why do I want to live?"

The Nine Tailed Fox sat on his haunches, as he looked down to his friend. "**You had the answer to that question when we all merged Life-force Kid, otherwise you would not have survived the fire. Now you must learn to live with that answer Naruto Namikaze."**

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze looked at his hands, as he spoke. "Like I said earlier Furball, the price I agreed to pay for Immortality was different and still had dreams to protect and live for. Now all I have left of those dreams, is an underground cave filled with books & scrolls, along with some mementos of a moment in time. For now I live to protect that which I have left, but I know that won't be enough in the future. It's barely just enough even for me now. Like I said the path before me is running out, it's just a matter of time until it ends. There will come a point that I run out of road so what then?" Kurama made a fist with his paw, as he punched the blonde in the arm.

Unmoved by the blow, the Warrior narrowed his eyes upon the Demon. Ninja & Demon started down each other, as the Blonde cracked his knuckles and the Fox grinned. Kurama spoke**. "Like Kushina told you that day. MAN ****UP**** and grow a pair, then ****DEAL**** with it!"** Naruto half smiled, but it didn't touch his eyes.

The Blonde sighed, as he physically relaxed. "I lived in a world of darkness, shadows, blood, sacrifices and war. I walked in all those places where others feared to tread. All my life I faced that darkness, in order to bring light to it. Yet in all that time, I never once gave a thought to what I would do when it was all over. For me, the end of one battle just meant the beginning of another. Maybe I can't dream anymore, because I never knew how to in the beginning?"

The Nine Tails snorted at that, as he rolled his shoulders preparing to stand. **"You lived your life up until now for other people Naruto Namikaze, ****NOW**** you must learn to live it for yourself. Like I said Kid, in the end it ****IS**** the same price. Whenever I told you one of your crazy ideas wouldn't work, you told me the past was there for a reason. It was the greatest gift that one could be given and the greatest teacher of all. You said that it taught us mistakes, mistakes that could be learned from so we could move towards a better future. Through those lessons of the past, you made the dream of peace in the Shinobi world a reality. What you are feeling now isn't the end of the line Kid, with Immortally there is no such thing. What you are really feeling is the end of one path and the beginning of a new one. Where that takes you, just ****WHO**** can say? Like I said neither ****YOU**** nor ****I**** know what tomorrow will bring, for now all I can tell you is this. If you need a reason to live then find one. If you need a reason to dream, then sleep and banish your nightmares away. BUT in order to do that you must let go of your past, in order to begin moving forward. Learn from it yes, but to be shackled to it is a mistake that I made. Learn from my mistakes Kid, so you don't repeat them yourself in the future."**

Naruto chuckled a little, as he grinned at the Great Nine Tails. "So YODA what would be your greatest wisdom to pass on to your successor o wise one? Besides the whole **KILL** them **ALL** and let Kami decide approach to World Peace that is?"

The Fox looked hard at Naruto for a moment, then sighed & spoke. **"Immortality is a ****LONG**** time Kid. It's even longer when your alone. Don't make the same mistake that ****WE**** did Naruto. If you find your soul mate then embrace it, don't push it away like you did in the past. Learn from ****YOUR**** own mistakes too Kid, not just mine or those of others."**

At Kurama's words, Naruto's body hardened preparing for battle. "Just this morning carpet, you were bitching about being on a leash stuck inside of me. Now you want to talk about your end? If I do find my other half, then YOU **KNOW** what that will mean for you." The Blondes tone was steel at the end, unbending and unbreakable steel.

The Fox just yawned, as his Vessel prepared for battle. **"You made your choice that day Kid and I made ****MINE****. You can no more change THAT than I can. That is the reason after all that you have never given me your word since then, that you will save me before our time runs out isn't it?" **The Blonde deflated, as he looked away from his friend. Kurama actually chuckled as he spoke once more. **"You might be able to do the impossible Kid, ****BUT**** we both know from experience that even ****YOU**** have your limits. We both know I'm living on borrowed time here, nothing more nothing less. When we merged Life-force together with the others, our power became yours. ****NOW**** I'm nothing more than an empty shell and echo of the past. An echo that's on borrowed time, ****TIME**** that you gave me back but still borrowed none the less. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow or for the next thousand years, BUT eventually that echo ****WILL**** fade, with me along with it."**

Naruto Namikaze looked up at his lifelong friend. "You expect me to just give up on your furry ass Kurama? YOU KNOW ME BETTER THAN **THAT**!"

Kurama just smiled down sadly at his friend. **"Then promise to save me Kid."** The Blonde made fists, but did not answer. Kurama placed his paw on Naruto's head once more, as he spoke. **"I don't blame you Naruto and I ****NEVER**** will. Like I said, I made my OWN choice that day just like you did yours. I know how much you want to save me, I CAN feel it within you after all. But when you learn the Lessons of the past, you shouldn't forget them either. You already saved ME Naruto, you broke me out of my own hatred. That did more for me than you will ever know Kid, it did more for ****ALL**** of us then you will ever know either."**

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze looked up to the source, of all his own personal pain & suffering in his lifetime. A walking Chakra Demon and Natural Disaster of Biblical Proportions which had on more than one occasion, tried to **KILL** the Blonde simply out of spite. That same walking Natural Disaster that had helped him in the end, to save the World Of Shinobi from the Ten Tails AND the Last of the Uchiha Clan. From start to finish in their time together whether he wanted to or not, Kurama had always had the Young Warriors back. Either through self-preservation in the very beginning or through bonds forged in friendship here at the end. That walking pain in the ass, had saved his own on more than one occasion. Now all Naruto could do was look at his last remaining Friend and watch as he was supposed to slip away over time? The Warrior & Master Of Chakra opened his mouth to speak, as ONE thought passed through his mind.

"_Not on MY __**WATCH!**__"_

The Nine Tailed Fox cut him off though. **"You can NOT stop it Kid, you ****NEVER**** could. The Fourth Hokage set more into motion that day when he sealed me inside you, more than just the burden of Jinchuuriki upon his Son. There was a time it could have been undone, but that time passed when I made my choice. ****YOU**** know it, ****I**** know it and there is nothing that can be done to change it. Until then I will stand by you until the end Kid, no matter which path you take in the future. Just as long as you keep your promise to us when and ****IF**** the time comes, then that's all I need or ask for in the future."**

The Man with the Nindo of **NEVER** going back on his word, snorted at that. "Furball all I have left that means anything to me NOW, is YOU and my WORD that's **IT**! If you think that I will break the only promise, that STILL means a dam to me now then your Furry Ass should KNOW **BETTER**! Besides it's a moot point anyway at best. After all the odds of finding my Soul Mate or even someone that could survive the process back in the World Of Shinobi was next to **NILL**. In this World the odds of finding my Soul Mate considering that A, I don't belong here and B no one knows **FUCK** about Chakra. Are so long that not even Granny Tsunade would take that bet on and you **KNOW** that's saying something!"

Turns out that a "Human" from the World of Shinobi and a "Human" from this World of Science, were basically two different species. Less related on a biological level than a Lion and a Housecat. Chakra applied to Naruto's BODY and Chakra applied to another "Humans" body would have two different effects. The Genius & Prodigy began to build theories about this Phenomena, that he would need to test to make sure, but he did have a good idea about WHY.

Evolution as a whole in this world, was far behind that of the World of The Shinobi. Probably due to the fact, that for some reason the World was slowly decaying in a way that only a Chakra Sensor like himself could detect. Without that background radiation of residual Chakra like his own had, Life itself had somehow staled and began to decay. Which meant instead of a stronger next generation through Evolution, life & biological progress was stunted and in some cases even reversed.

Kurama chuckled at the 'Legendary Suckers' misfortune, at not noticing a fools bet when she sore it. **"Maybe Kid, maybe."** A thoughtful look passed over the Fox's Face at that. The Ninja tried to read the thought, but was blocked by the Demon. Snorting to himself, Kurama yawned as he stood up. **"Anyway only time will tell, what happens next in your story Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze. Beside one of your life lessons is, Never to say Never, remember?"**

The Blonde snorted. "That only applies to Chakra, Jutsu, Science, Laws Of The Universe, Laws Of The Gods and weird shit. All other things including my love life or your furry ass, is **NOT** covered by that rule." Wanting to get off this current topic, the Ninja redirected. "Besides like you said, we still may have another thousand years together. So until then I will have to put up with a severe pain in the ass, along with a very big headache." Blonde smirked at the demon.

Kurama growled. **"By that time I will have found a way to definitely eat ****YOU****, if you keep being a smartass."** But seeing through the Blondes attempt, Kurama continued. **"You know Kid, like I said Immortality is a ****LONG**** time to be alone. Even a Thousand years is but a moment within Eternity. Finding your soul mate, would give you that reason to live you are looking for. It even gives you that reason to dream you are looking for too."**

The Ninja looking heavy once more sighed, as he looked back to the moon. "Gaining a companion even in love, at the cost of my last remaining friend. Is my nightmare Kurama, not my dream. **Only** the Gods would be so cruel, as to place a choice like that before someone."

Kurama began to walk towards the balcony, as he coiled ready to spring. **"You already made that choice Kid and I supported you in it."** The Fox looked back over his shoulder. **"You always said better they bury you, then you having to bury those you cared about. It's a selfish thing but there it is. For me and the others, it was better that you went on and lived. Now if you're just going to hum for the next couple of hours, then I'm going hunting."** At this Kurama sprang over the balcony, and landed 3 stories down.

* * *

_Storyline Flashback._

* * *

The Blonde had one more hit, before the Final Blow of his current situation met him head-on. Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze had found out early, that his Ninja Supplies were limited to the clothes on his back and what was sealed onto his skin. He had tried an experiment to use a piece of A4 plain paper and a biro to draw a simple seal, absolutely nothing happened. The Blonde also tried to channel Chakra into a piece of scrap metal, again not a god dam thing. The Ninja never really knew how much he took a Kunai or Sealing Ink for granted, until his supply was completely cut off. Worse was because of his current Chakra Control issues, he was burning through his already limited supplies at a breakneck pace and would be fucked for more if he didn't find viable alternatives. So inside his secret base that the Ninja had codenamed the **DEN**, Naruto Namikaze the genius & prodigy began working on projects that could help his Shinobi supply problems.

"_Also if he was honest with himself, it was so he would not have to think about what to do next."_

He began by conducting experiments on seeing if it was possible, to find alternatives for the items he had lost or used in this world. To the Blondes surprise he had found out that high-level Carbon, could be used to channel Chakra or even Elemental Chakra. So Naruto had set up a means of Kunai & Shuriken production inside his DEN. He had also forged himself a new sword that he had engraved in classic Uzumaki & Senju Sealing script, as his last sword was broken when he used it to cut open the rift that had brought him here. It turned out to be quite easy to replace things like his Smoke Bombs and such, as he already knew the general formula that these items were made from. Chakra & Solider pills were no longer necessary as with his current level of Chakra Reserves, combined with the Nine Tailed Fox meant that Chakra exhaustion was a thing of the past. Truly even using his **Shadow Clones** like he had been, thousands at a time 24/7, the fatigue backlash was nowhere near a level that required a Chakra pill to recover from. The odds of meeting a foe or situation here that needed him to push himself to the limit, so far just didn't and probably wouldn't exist. Naruto had also managed again to find a working substitute for Sealing Ink, though it would take time before he had a steady supply.

No the biggest supply problem for the Blonde was paper, he had tried all kinds of paper that he could get his hands on and still could not find a working substitute for his Fuinjutsu. So when you need papers, you go to your go-to-guy for such things. Through his twenty VERY colourful years in business, Jenks had received quite a few unusual requests from his clients. However when Priority Client Number 2 told him to find a paper manufacture, that grow their own trees under the light of a full moon, while three birds sang from a nest, Jenks had officially seen it all. The gentle whisper in his ear of the name "**Shadow**" snapped him back to reality and when he landed **HARD**, began to look for such a place as though his life and those of his wife & children depended upon it. Surprisingly Jenks came through for the Blonde Ninja once more and Naruto made another purchase of a small paper making company. The firm was a small family run place, which specialised in custom orders within a niche market of something called Hippies. When Naruto first arrived at the plant, the employees were all worried that the new owner would lay them off and sell all the business assets. When the Blonde told them that if they could produce a piece of paper that had a very special making process, he would double pay and guarantee the place would remain open for their lifetime, the employees took the challenge. Naruto now had a paper supply that was usable to the Fuinjutsu Master, though like his Sealing Ink was limited.

Naruto was beginning to spend more time at his DEN and by extension had begun to get noticed in the town of Forks. So much so, that the Chief Of Police himself paid the Blonde for a visit. The knock to the door came at 8 o'clock in the morning, Naruto had just finished up his morning workout session inside his Dojo. Not at all surprised that he had a visitor, as his Seal Array around the 10 mile perimeter had already detected the car on approach along his drive. No what surprised the Blonde was the fact it was the Chief Of Police in person. Naruto actually asked the man for ID, as he had noticed that was the norm here. Rather than pulling a blade out of nowhere and pinning the guest to the floor by their throat, as you ask for clearance codes. The Chief Of Police turned out to be a nice man by the name of Charlie Swan. Apparently there had already been talk in the town that someone had brought this place and a strange young man had been spotted in the area recently. When Naruto gave him a polite smile and told him that he brought the place, the questions began to fly.

As an investigator of criminal activity himself Naruto could see through Charles questions, as the two of them had a chat over a cup of coffee. Naruto told the tale he was currently using at the moment, of being a seventeen year old orphan who was an emancipated minor. Whose parents had died tragically when he was still young and who's guardian was off traveling doing important research. Being a minor of course meant that all his records were protected and sealed within the courts. It was always easier to lie with the truth, with just a tweak here and there. Also without Charlie asking, Naruto went and got all his papers, ID, Deeds to the house, Credit Cards, Bank Information and such as a sign he had nothing to hide. Naruto knew that Jenks work was top notch and had no problem showing it to the local law. Charlie seemed quite happy with the arrangements, however was concerned about such a young man living out here on his own. When Naruto explained that after recent events in his life, he would like to spend some time in privacy Charlie dropped the matter.

After a pleasant chat that lasted an hour and with Naruto, thinking he was free and in the clear. Charlie Swan began to move towards the door about to leave, but then stopped and turned to speak. "You need to get your school records from you old school sent here, before term starts in two weeks." Naruto Namikaze actually liked J Jenks and the man had really become his go-to-guy and did good work, but in that moment the Ninja decided to kill his Lawyer & Forger for this.

Jenks did actually live after his next meeting with Priority Client Number 2, though it was not pleasant for him. Naruto was pretty much sure, that he had shaved about TEN years off the poor man's life. Thinking about it afterwards he had to admit to himself, that maybe it was a just a tad bit of overkill. To storm into the man's office and slap a clock onto his desk, which was held there by Chakra and thus could not be removed. The Blonde then placed 36 hours onto the counter and started the countdown, withdrew his sword seemingly from nowhere and unleashed a bit of Kurama's Killing Intent. Told Jenks to give him an education from a school in Tokyo by the time the counter hit zero, or they would both go for a walk inside the forest. Kurama had to admit that the loud constant ticking noise the counter made, along with the speaking "You now have 29 hours left to live" countdown and so on was a nice touch.

* * *

_Naruto's Mansion First Thing._

Naruto Namikaze had finished up is morning workout & training session inside his dojo at around 7 and began to get ready for school. Dear Kami it was all he could do NOT to cry, at the current situation he now found himself in. Against popular belief Naruto had always enjoyed learning new things, but he had and always will be a hands-on type of learner. Sitting in a classroom facing a chalkboard, while the person standing next to it spoke for twelve hours a day had always been torture to the Blonde.

Back in the day when the Shinobi Academy was Naruto's cover story for his time within ANBU. Given the choice of having a resistance training session with Ibiki Morino, or the memories of a **Shadow Clone** after a day at the academy? Naruto would choose the Sadist Of The Leaf Village any day of the week thank you very much. At least with Ibiki he had believed in VERY hands-on training methods, when it came to building a person's resistance to Torture & Interrogation. Naruto liked Iruka Umino for no other reason than the fact he could look past the Fox, but the man could peal paint off the walls with one of his lectures.

However at least back in the Ninja Academy, you got to spend most lessons outside and punch the crap out of a training dummy to let the rest out. Here in this world Naruto had seen enough, to realise that he was now looking at EIGHT hours a day of useless & boring trivia at best and the latest teen mellow drama at worst. The Blonde had discovered early that the Devil himself had a hand in creating this world, as he had never imagined there could be so many Fan Girls in existence. From what the Ninja had seen on TV about High School, it looked like the entire place would be filled with them.

Naruto Namikaze had an odd idol thought about whether or not he should perform a Warding Ritual, to ward off Evil Spirits before he left his house. As the "New Kid" in school the Blonde would be the shiny new thing in class and the Devil's Spawn would probably flock towards it. The strange & mysterious new guy that came from a foreign country and seemed to be loaded that kept to himself.

Turning off the water and getting out of his shower, Naruto wrapped a towel around his waist and strode across the room to his closet. Opening up the doors to look upon the rows & rows of clothes, that were all custom made to his own designs by a batch of his clones.

To a Ninja a person's Heritage was important to them, to a Ninja from a Clan that Heritage was even more important to them. Clan members were always very proud of their Bloodlines and liked to wear their Clan Crests on clothes for all to see, to show that they came from talented families. Naruto always thought the idea of doing that was just plain **DUMB** in his opinion. As having an Uchiha Fan on your back, meant that everyone with grudge against that particular Clan now had a bull's-eye & target to aim at. It also gave so much information away to your enemy before a fight even started, that you might as well just hand over a full CV along with a list of all the Jutsu you were going to use during the fight. All someone had to do in order to beat a person from a Clan, was study one member with that Clans specialty and you pretty much knew how to beat them all. Ironically it was always those Ninja that never relied on a Clans Specific Jutsu, that were the strongest & most famous among their numbers.

However since the Hokage & Clan Heir was in this new world and no one had any idea what a particular Clan Crest meant. Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze saw no harm now, in wearing his own on his clothes too. However the Blonde had never liked the idea, of wearing just one of the Crests from his Bloodline & Heritage. After all the Shinobi was the last surviving member from THREE, of the greatest Bloodlines & Clans that had ever existed and didn't want to dishonour their memory by choosing between them. So the Blonde had played around with their designs in the past and came up with a new Clan Crest for himself that incorporated their elements & represented all three.

Naruto going over the clothes in his closet picked out a reasonable outfit, that while confortable was also practical and hid the efforts of his training. Fan Girls and a lot of muscles was always a very bad combination, Itachi Uchiha had taught the Blonde this. Itachi may have had mental issues, but the man did give good advice when it came to dealing with the Devils Spawn. The saying of…..

"_The more you show, the more they crow and the less they know, the faster they go."_

Was patented by that very same Uchiha. Naruto get dressed in some lose fitting jeans, one of his favourite shirts and placed a baggy sweater over the top. On his back just below the collar of his neckline, was the Blondes Family Crest embroidered into the cloth. Naruto had done it like that, so if anybody asked he could pass it off as a designers logo. The Ninja once fully dressed, walked over to his bedside table and picked up his wrist bracers.

The Ninja had found out early that quite a few places, had metal detectors placed around there entrances & exits. The young warrior had to think fast, the first time he walked through one into Seattle Airport and the thing lit up like a "Christmas Tree" at all the metal in his weapons that he had concealed on himself at the time. So to hide his Kunai & Shuriken better along with his Sword and other items, Naruto had forged himself his bracers. Each was gold and engraved to look like ornate jewellery, but the patterns were actually Seal arrays for item storage. They also had Chakra Limiters engraved upon them, to help the Blonde when it came to his Chakra Control out in public.

Placing his bracers on Naruto rolled his wrists, then picked up his wallet & bag as he passed and headed towards his garage. Stopping as he got to his garage door, the Blonde picked up one of his long leather trench coats with the Kanji for 'SHADOW' upon the back.

If there was one thing in this new world the Blonde had found himself in that he loved, it was motor vehicles. Naruto had always been a fan of great speeds, after all he was the son of the Yellow Flash who just happened to be the fastest man that had ever existed. Well that was until the Gold Fox had surpassed his Father, with his own **Flying Storm God Jutsu**. However seeing as how teleporting to the front gate of Forks High School was out, the Blonde needed other means of transportation to get there and around in general.

Naruto had been worried at first, about what actions or things would draw attention and standout in this world. As it turned out as long as the Blonde didn't fire off a **Rasengan** in public or something else Chakra related that other people could see, then the Ninja should be golden. So just like his elaborate home, the Blonde decided to spoil himself a little and have some fun when it came to transport. Looking over the 10 vehicles inside his garage, Naruto began to decide which one to use as his town car.

The first two or as the Blonde liked to call them his Beasts, his go anywhere do anything transport. One was an out rigged Hummer, the other was a modified Range Rover. Each was huge and towered over everything else inside his garage, both were modified for off road driving which was pointless but fun none the less. Next to them sat his two ladies, looking sleek and sexy. SSC Ultimate Aero with custom flame paintjob and stripped down to all but a gas pedal and steering wheel. Sitting next to her was his McLaren F1, which was the same except for the nitro tank in the boot and turbo button on the steering wheel. Next were Naruto's Business Cars as buying & selling certain things did go a lot easier, when people thought that you were serious and had the cash to back it up. His shiny brand new Aston Martin DB7 and his Audi R8, most certainly did the trick and they were also pretty quick too.

Naruto had already decided except for maybe his Land Rover, that none of them should be seen around the town if he could avoid it. Blending in was all about being subtle and not drawing unwanted attention to yourself. The Blonde knew that he was already pushing his luck as it was, if he wanted to be left alone in the future. So the Ninja's eyes moved onto the last four vehicles that he had available right now, two more cars and two motorbikes.

Naruto loved riding motorbikes and feeling the wind rushing through his hair at GREAT **SPEED**. One was just a bit of junk that the Blonde had been using, to learn all about mechanics and go off road with it. The other was Naruto's most favourite thing to ride inside his garage, when he wanted to relax and unwind a little. His Suzuki Hayabusa with a custom orange paint job & gold flame trim motif, which roared onto one wheel the moment he cranked the throttle. Unfortunately it was unusable at the moment, because the cops had clocked it speeding at over 250 just outside Port Angeles and Naruto KNEW that the Forks cops were on the lookout for it. So best to keep his baby indoors for now, until he could get it repainted and the heat cooled off a bit.

Sighing to himself once more, the Blonde looked at the last two cars he had available. These were his I'm not in a rush, but they still move category. Out of everything else he had, they would draw the least amount of attention. But still a Lotus Elise Convertible and a Ford Mustang Sport are still going to turn heads, as they pulled up.

Making his decision, the Blonde walked over to his Lotus and tossed his bag into the passenger seat. Placing his left hand on top of the driver's door, the Ninja in one fluid motion hopped over it and landed softly in the driving seat. Buckling up and placing his key into the ignition, the highly tuned engine of his town ride purred into life like a predator. Reaching under the dash the Blonde pressed the hidden button to open his garage doors, just as his right foot hit the floor and the car exploded out into the world.

* * *

_Forks High School Present Time._

* * *

Naruto arrived at Forks High School, just in time to hear the bell go signalling first period. As he pulled up a group of girls who looked about fifteen, were standing in front of the entrance. Starring transfixed as they watched the Blonde get out of his car, they giggled & whispered to each other as they ran off to get to their first classes. All the while looking back and trying to steal glances at the new "Hottie". All the warrior could do as he heard them was shudder, this was going to be brutal. After Kurama had his moment of amusement at the Blondes expense, he wiped a tear away from his eye with one of his tails.

Naruto looked as his furry pain in the ass annoyed. _"Happy?"_ The question left his lips in a very sarcastic tone.

Kurama looked down at his Vessel with a wide grin. _**"**__**VERY**__**."**_ Another snicker left his throat, but a thoughtful look then passed onto his face. _**"You know you could just disappear and not have to do this. After all there really isn't anyone in this world who could challenge of even find you. Especially if you did **__**NOT**__** want them too."**_

Naruto sighed as he answered. _ "Yea you are right but I have just gotten used to the idea, of using my proper name of Naruto Namikaze and not having to hide it all the time. Then there is the fact that I have already unloaded my __**Storage Seal Matrix**__ and hidden all my Clan & Jutsu Scrolls here. I've set up shop and introduced myself around as a seventeen year old. I can't just disappear into thin air without a reason, when most of what I have to my name is linked to my Namikaze Identity and its underage. You know just as well as I do how ID works here and with their level of technology, everything is digital and interconnected regardless of Country. That name and __**ALL**__ the assets, would be well and truly __**BURNED**__ for at least the next 50 years." _ Naruto sighed again, as he began to walk towards the School Office. _"Anyway I might as well do something to pass the time here and who knows? I might just actually learn something from here."_ Although the Blonde was hardly convinced of that.

After all when you have an IQ that makes most of the Nara Clan weep and the ability to create over a thousand copies of yourself to study, train and learn 24/7. Your Knowledge & Skill base, tended to build **FAST**.

Kurama snorted, as he settled back down onto the floor of his cave. _**"I'm still in favour of conquering this world."**_ The Fox Demon grinned. _**"I bet you three tails that I could have total control over this world in **__**FIVE**__** years, a decade tops."**_

Naruto snorted in response. _"It wouldn't be much of a challenge. This world relies too much on Technology, Guns & Money and less & less on their own individual strength. Strip away their Guns & Toys and all they have left, is people who haven't got the first idea about how to fight like a Ninja or a Ninja-Houseplant for that matter."_ Kurama chuckled, as it was true after all. _"All you would need to take over this world, would be a large bankroll and to use a couple of __**Tailed Beast Bombs**__. Besides after everything that has happened to me over the last couple of years, some quiet time in a sleepy town wouldn't hurt us any. "_

Kurama snorted. _**"**__**TRUE**__** conquest does get boring after a while. It's always the same old destroy this or kill that. Still if you want to shake things up a little, then you can always let me out for a bit of fresh air."**_

Inside Naruto's mind the blonde leaped into the air, as he back flipped and landed onto the foxes head. _"You can already leave here whenever you want to Furball. You know full well that you can appear anywhere within the Mansion Grounds, within the__** Summoning Seal **__array anytime you want."_ The Ninja settled himself back onto the Demons head.

Kurama's eyes looked up to the Blonde as he snorted. _**"Yea but my Chakra is still stuck inside you. I can only have my power back when you open the Seal and channel it to me. Otherwise I am the size of a horse and couldn't even go a round with Shukaku."**_

The Blonde smirked as he opened the door into the School. _"You know Kurama has no one ever told you, that SIZE does __**NOT**__ matter?"_ The Nine Tails growled deep & menacingly in warning, as Naruto chuckled & continued. _"You already know it's going to be a while before I have the Chakra Control Skill back in order to do that. Right now my Chakra Control is back up to around Kage Level, but given the amount of raw power involved it's still going to take a shit load more time. At least the __**Summoning Seal**__ array lets you have access to a body that's your own for now anytime you want."_

Kurama grumbled. _**"Yes but its sill a prison. Bigger than what that cage used to be, but it's **__**STILL**__** a cage."**_

Naruto chuckled and gave a knowing grin. _"You are still pissed that Thumper keeps taunting you, aren't you?"_

One of Kurama's favourite things to do in this new world was hunt. Added to the fact he got to go after new prey in the Mansions grounds whenever he wanted, meant one happy Chakra Demon or he used to be until the day he met Thumper the bunny rabbit. Kurama always liked hunting rabbits since he was a baby and were one of his favourite prey. Not because they tasted good or because they put up a good & decent fight, but because as a 'Goal' rabbits were always a challenge. To a predator like a Fox it was all about the hunt, stalking, cunning and skill behind the chase not the actual kill. Rabbits while small were very aware, agile, quick and easily spooked, so stalking and catching one was always a challenge. However Kurama had now met a foe just as quick & cunning as he was, in a brown rabbit that his Vessel had nick named Thumper.

The first meeting between predator and prey, did not go very well for the fox no sir not well at all.

Kurama had just managed to sneak upon the tasty looking morsel, when it all of a sudden panicked and bolted like a bullet deeper into the forest. The little fucker took off at a speed the Chakra Demon had never seen in a rabbit before, as it headed straight for the boundary line that encircled the Mansions grounds. Kurama gave chase but to his **GREAT** surprise, was not actually fast enough to catch the little menace and hurtled headfirst into the invisible barrier that was his range limit at great fucking speed. It was as if Thumper knew that it was safe then, as it just sat there in front of the very highly concussed fox almost as if it was taunting him "saying round one to me". Since then Thumper has kept making appearances and the chase was on each time, as he just keeps escaping and rubbing more salt into the foxes wounded pride. After so many failed attempts at trying to catch **ONE** stupid annoying little rabbit, Kurama has become more than a little obsessed in his quest.

Kurama growled out manically. _**"MARK **__**MY**__** WORDS **__**KID**__**! I WILL **__**GET**__** that annoying little **__**FUCKER**__**, if it's the **__**LAST**__** thing I **__**DO**__**! I **__**SWEAR IT**__** upon my **__**TAILS**__**!"**_ The Chakra Demon continued to roar out in fury, as Kurama's nine tails lashed out behind him.

Naruto snickered again as he stepped through the door, oh the joys of a **Transformed Shadow Clone** and a prank just like old times. Still the momentary amusement of taunting & tormenting his friend, did nothing to alleviate the Blonde of his current situation. So preparing to face the boredom of a classroom once more.

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze steeled himself, as he entered the Reception Office to get his timetable and start High School.

* * *

**Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze Training Results****.**

Naruto Namikaze lost his Abilities when he entered the Twilight Universe, after the **FUCK UP**. Since then he has been training to restore them back to what they used to be. His Abilities will be described & restored in stages as the story goes along and any ability I give him, will have an explanation with it in the same chapter. The rules set out for them like Kurama appearing in the Mansion Grounds at will, must always be stuck to.

_Naruto's Abilities regain so far are_

Taijutsu and all aspects that go along with that i.e. Strength, Speed, Agility, Ninja Movement and Reflexes are all sharper than the finest razor.

Kenjutsu are all again as sharp as they can be and Naruto is surgical when it comes to Ninja Wires, Senbon, Shuriken, Kunai and his Sword

Stealth Skills are also restored to the point that he can remove all traces of himself from the physical environment including scent.

Genjutsu he is immune to as his Natural Defensive abilities (MIND & BODY) remains intact and offensive Genjutsu is what he is currently working on.

Ninjutsu is restored to the point of, Academy & ANBU basics fully re-mastered. Elemental Manipulation for all 5 Elements mastered to the Leaf Stage (Without Over powering them & Mass Collateral / Property Damage) and he can augment his weapons with Wind & Lightning Chakra. He has access to a variety of Elemental Jutsu for all 5 Elements but nothing above C Rank. Time Space Manipulation is restored to Replacement, Body Flicker, Shadow Dance and basic long distance Teleportation (Can only Teleport from one Marker to another while they are NOT moving) re-mastered.

Chakra & Shape Manipulation relearned to the point, that he can form a perfect one handed Rasengan in less than 2 seconds.

Chakra Control re-learned with Leaf Spinning, Tree Walking, Water Walking and Kunai Balancing.

Fuinjutsu is FULLY re-mastered to all levels.

Healing Ability maxed out to the point that Major wounds or broken bones, heal in seconds and if you chop off an arm or a leg he can re grow it within a minute.

Sage Mode, re-learned Sage Meditation but is not yet at the Skill Level Necessary for Sage Mode.

Jinchuuriki Mode can be used but is a Battle no go at the moment, until he has his Chakra Control back up to the point of a Razors edge.

_Naruto Namikaze Power LEVELS and Modes._

The Young Blonde has several battle states that are STANDBY, ANBU, KAGE, SAGE, JINCHUURIKI.

Standby is his general ability range that he uses at school, when pulling back his Chakra in order to keep himself under the radar.

ANBU is his normal state when he isn't pulling back his Chakra to the bear minimum, in other words Day to Day.

Kage is when he is unlimited. Naruto wears Training & Chakra limiter Seals. So when they are switched off he is at full power.

Sage is when he channels Nature Energy and enters Sage Mode.

Jinchuuriki has 3 modes to it, Active (Flaming with the Basic Seal on him), Warrior (When he has the Cape & Black whisker marks and the Seal is fully open) and finally Tailed Beast (Kurama / Naruto merge BIG GLOWING FOX).

**Overall ALL Bingo Book entry.**

Kage Level **S CLASS** Threat, Engage with **EXTREME CAUTION** only in **VASTLY** superior numbers. **RUN** if you really piss him off.

* * *

**Omake.** Naruto Uzumaki's **HELL** on Earth.

Naruto Uzumaki had just returned from Seattle after making his one thousandth trip, after making that most horrible of discoveries. He didn't want to believe it, but the Blonde could no longer deny the fact that it was indeed very true. Currently Naruto was at his makeshift campsite crying true tears of pain, misery and despair. Wailing out into the night about how he had already suffered enough, but now on top of everything else now this?

Kurama roared out as he spoke. _**"**__**NARUTO**__** for the love of **__**KAMI**__**, shut the FUCK **__**UP**__**!"**_ The Nine Tails had spent the last two hours, covering his ears with his paws.

The wailing Blonde struck by grief, began to cry out even more. "BUT THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS **RAMEN ****HERE****!** WHAT KIND OF A **FUCKED UP** WORLD, DOSEN'T HAVE **RAMEN**?!" Naruto continued to scream towards the heavens, about how was this fair? Screaming about, just what did he ever do to deserve this?

The Great Nine Tails Chakra Demon had finally reached his limit and had enough. Kurama decided in that moment, to perform an 'Intervention' Tailed Beast style and raised his mighty paw over 300 hundred ft. into the air. Then bringing his full strength to bare, he bashed the wailing addict into the Planet once more.

Final score Planet 3 - Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze **ZERO**.

* * *

**General Answers To Some Posted Reviews For ****Twilight Ninja**.

_Review_ by **Jebest4781**. well this was a fun story so far and will be interesting on what stuff you will do here with Bella replacing Edward in the Cullen clan

_**My Answer** _= **ONE** of the things I hate about the Twilight Saga, is **New Moon**. That book is **VERY** weak, during the original Twilight Sage in my **own** opinion. There are a thousand better ways Stephenie Meyer could have used, to bring the Wolves into her story. Also there were better ways to begin the love triangle between Jacob, Bella and Edward as well in my opinion.

Serious peeve number **TWO**. Is the fact it takes **FOUR** books, for Bella to actually become a dam Vampire! I get the whole Bella & Edward need to have a Kid, so the next Saga if there is to be one can be built off that. But still **FOUR** god dam books to get to that and then? You only get a Bella Vampire for **HALF** of that final book? I personally felt **VERY** cheated at the end of **Breaking Dawn**_._

So I am personally looking forward, to a complete Bella story as a Vampire. Because I have tweaked that, I do have a backstory for her which is completely different from Edwards. That I think should stand up pretty well. My own thought on a Bella Cullen is although it screws with the original Twilight Story, because of the Bella has a daughter angle. I **HAVE **always thought that Bella should have BEEN Cullen first, **NOT** Edward.

_Review_ by **DeathCrawler**_. _why doesnt he go to japan or china for ramen?

_**My Answer**_ =A severe Addict & Junkie can **NEVER** think clearly, when they are going through Cold Turkey and Remission of their particular addiction. **PLUS** I have a particular scene in mind for the future. That involves Naruto Uzumaki's **FINAL** & **LAST** ever pot of Instant Ramen / beloved Sacred Noodles, along with a particular Cullen family member that is **NOT** Bella. Causalities & War Crimes form the event promise to be very **HIGH**, as Ramen Wednesday Begins.

_**Reviews**__ are the currency of my negations, when it comes to getting another chapter posted._


	2. Authors Introduction & Prologue

**Disclaimers****.**

**I DO ****NOT**** own Naruto or any part of the Naruto Franchise. This is a story written by me, a FAN of the Manga. I hold no Legal Status on any of the Characters from the Naruto Universe and DO ****NOT**** claim too. This is just a Fans own interpretation of the rich material provided, by some Dude in Tokyo who has a Wallet ****FULL**** of cash (AND Lawyers).**

**I DO ****NOT**** own Twilight or any part of the Twilight Franchise. This is a story written by me, a FAN of the Novels. I hold no Legal Status on any of the Characters from the Twilight Universe and DO ****NOT**** claim too. This is just a Fans own interpretation of the rich material provided, by Stephenie Meyer who has a bigger Wallet ****FULL**** of cash (AND Far ****MORE**** Lawyers).**

**This is a Fan Fiction and Fan Fiction ****ONLY****. Not to be sold or distributed as part of either, the Naruto or Twilight Franchises. **

**There are elements in this story of my own creation. As such all I ask in the future, if anyone uses them. Is to make them look ****COOL****.**

* * *

**Authors Introduction**.

Greetings to all and welcome to the start of **Twilight Ninja**. Firstly let me just say, this story is for written for ME and **ME** alone. It caters to my **OWN** personal taste and that's that. That's how I write for me and no one else so there. I am posting this to see what other people think of it, but I like it and that's all that matters to **ME**. I'm planning to finish **Twilight Ninja** first, before I move on to my other projects. Which means for the foreseeable future, updates to this story should be on a timetable of once every 2 – 3 weeks. Unless specifically specified at the end of the latest **NEW** chapter. Unless of course there is an act of God, demands on my time or a, OOOOOOOWWWWW it's a butterfly….

Now onto important business for the future of this story. I **LOVE** stories that have a Sci-Fi / Supernatural / Comic Book / Mystical / Magical context to them, with something called a **PLOT**. Now even something more important to me than that, is the Author **STICKS** to that plot. I have no problem in a person creating a world in which the sky is green, the grass is blue and ramen tastes like tofu. Just as long as the author **STICKS** to that all the way through their story. What I'm getting at people is the Story Mythology behind Characters, Powers and Worlds.

Take Superman for example, AKA The Man Of **Steel**. I have no problem with the guy being bulletproof to the point, that you can fire off over **ONE**** MILLION** rounds at him from a Mini-gun and he walks away without a scratch. In fact he goes one better than that and swallows the bullets, **CHEWS**, than spits them all out twice as fast as before. No problem with that at all in chapter one, BUT if in chapter **TWO** Lex Luthor pulls out a 45 Revolver and blows Superman's ass away with a **SINGLE** lead slug-shot. Then I take great **ISSUE** with that. What I'm saying is creating your own Worlds, Characters and Powers is good. **BUT** breaking your own rules for them, or pre-existing ones is **VERY ****BAD**.

As such here and now, I'm laying down the following **FIVE**** Commandments Of ****Twilight Ninja**. From this point on and all the way through the story, these rules will not be broken and are **FINAL**.

**1st**** Commandment** is the Food Chain. Vampires, Werewolves and Shape Shifters used to be the biggest & badest things in the Twilight Universe. Please not the keyword there, **USED** to be. **THAT** was before Naruto's entry into the Twilight Universe, he is now **KING**. Naruto vs. Vampire means **DEAD** vampire period. Naruto vs. the Volturi, the Southern Newborn Armies and every other Vampire on the face of the planet in a 1000 – 1 fight, means the **END** of the Vampire race. On the Food Chain a Demon will **ALWAYS** trump a Vampire, Werewolf or Shape Shifter.

**2nd**** Commandment** is Base Abilities when it comes to comparing Naruto's vs. Vampire. Naruto ANBU State when he isn't pulling back his Chakra to the bare minimum, equals the Physical Speed as Bella and the same Physical Strength as Emmett. A Naruto / Bella race would end in a tie or close finish. A Naruto / Emmett arm-wrestle would end in a tie or both would have to really work to earn a win. However when Naruto turns off his **Limiter Seals** and goes Kage Level, he has a 10 – 1 Strength & Speed advantage over them. Naruto senses of Sight, Smell and Hearing all match the Vampires but he can increase them by channelling Chakra. There is an issue with Venom, a will it affect him or won't it affect him. **BUT** that is a plot element for the future that I intend to play with.

**3rd**** Commandment** is the Vampires Powers & Abilities. The Vampire Powers will be the same as in Twilight, except for **ONE** exception.

**Alice** will have her Physic Ability, **BUT** she cannot see Naruto clearly. As he comes from a different Dimension / Universe, the **Ripple Of Fate** cannot bind him in this New World. He is blurry to Alice unless under certain conditions, then he becomes fuzzy with a few flashes. She can see around Naruto to the future, but when someone interacts with him they disappear from Alice's sight just like the Wolves.

**Jasper** will have his Empathic Ability also and can sense or influence Naruto's emotions, but **ONLY** if and when Naruto allows it.

**Bella** will have Edward's Mind Reading Ability in this story. However as I have categorized this as a Genjutsu (Ability Of The Mind), Naruto is immune due to ANBU conditioning for Mental Defences to prevent Access or Influence. The same goes for Jasper, as emotional control always has been and always will be a **KEY** part of his status as a Jinchuuriki.

Naruto has the option to lower these defences, to allow either Bella or Jasper to read or influence him. However this is always done on Naruto's terms, **NOT** theirs.

**4th**** Commandment** is Kurama's attitude on the World in general. The Nine Tailed Demon Fox Kurama, has that same Loveable & Cuddly attitude he had. When he attacked the Leaf Village and killed thousands of people the night of Naruto's birth. If it came down to a simple choice of walking the long way around New York City, to avoid a seen of **MASS** panic & chaos. **OR** walking through New York because it's simply quicker, all the while **SQUISHING** everything that came under his paws as he went, then Kurama would **SQUISH**, then **SQUISH** some more. Then on his way out of New York City, the Demon Fox would stop off at Liberty Island. To use the Statue Of Liberty as a toothpick, to get all off the bones **OUT** of his teeth. Dental Hygiene happens to be important to a Demon, especially a Fox like Kurama.

Kurama cares little for others except Naruto, as the Young Warrior earned his respect. If **ANY** Vampires, Werewolves, Shape Shifters or Humans, **PISS** the Nine Tails Chakra Demon Fox **OFF**. Then the poor unfortunate fool, **WILL** find out exactly why Kurama is called a **DEMON**.

The only exception to this rule is Bella Cullen, because of Naruto's feelings towards her. However even she can only push so far, otherwise Kurama **WOULD** eat Bella whole and then head off to New York City to use his new favourite toothpick.

**5th**** Commandment** is characters from the Naruto Universe popping up in the **Twilight Ninja** Universe. Sasuke Uchiha and Obito Uchiha are **DEAD** and good riddance, I have never been an Uchiha Fan and never will be. Its physically impossible to write a Naruto fanfiction story and **NOT** bash Sasuke Uchiha **OR** the entire Uchiha Clan, it **REALLY** is trust me I have tried. As far as **Twilight Ninja** is concerned, the entire Uchiha Clan is **DEAD** & **BURIED** and that name should be stricken from all history.

Naruto characters will be included but mostly in flashbacks, as a means to move the Depth & Development of my Naruto Character along. I have a few Ideas & Options about bringing in a couple of **SPECIFIC** characters from the Naruto Universe towards the end. I have **NOT** yet however made a final decision about that, because I have a few options on how to develop the story as we go along. So the true rule for this is Wait & See, as personally I don't like spoilers to a story I'm reading. So as a rule I don't give them out, unless asking for a second opinion on an idea I'm working on.

As for doing Dialogue and such, I will only being doing that with the main Characters or as a means to move the Story along. Mostly interaction between the Predators & Food (in other words the Little People / Humans in general) will be paragraphed rather than word for word, unlike my main character interactions. Now that we have all been brought up to speed and we know where we stand for the future.

**_Then let's get on with the show…._**

* * *

_**Prologue**_.

* * *

I have never given much thought of how I was actually going to die, being what I am means that there is no end for me only tomorrow. It has always been like this for me, after my heart once took its last beat over **TWO** centuries ago and I became one of the Immortals. After that final heartbeat of my humanity was over, my new sole existence became one frozen day just like my heart that would last forever.

Or so I had once thought.

A little under a year ago, what I thought was actually impossible happened once more. My time restarted and my heart that had been frozen & still for over two hundred years began to beat once more. Now as my sisters and I stand inside this cold place, being surrounded on all sides by solid walls & frozen statues with nowhere to run or hide. We had to wait as our hearts got closer ready to kill us, for the current situation we had gotten ourselves in. Alice had just foreseen it, our futures had just disappeared completely. Our Todays had ended and Our Tomorrow's were now gone.

My heart was almost upon me, to end my time upon this earth.

The three of us spun around in fear, as I felt & heard my heart roar and the wall now in front of us exploded with two bright blue balls of light. Two more frozen statues exploded into the cold chamber, straight through the solid walls of stone and then exploded into dust. The Ancient & Heavy doors in front of us opened, to reveal our hearts & ENDS standing before us. Rosalie's end was standing on the left, looking Tall & Menacing. Alice's end was standing on the right, looking Stern & Serious.

And my heart and end?

Was standing right before me in the middle, with his arms out stretched either side. As my Yellow Eyes locked with his Red, I foresaw our end in them as my heart growled deep & menacingly. His whiskers were now on full show for all to see, as his trench coat swirled out behind him and he stared me down. Moving his right-hand to bare down his wrath upon me, he pointed. To my frozen sole it felt as though, I was looking at my own personal Guardian Angel.

Just as he was about to descend down from Heaven, with Flaming tip wings & Sword Of Vengeance to strike down **ALL** before him.

My Heart & Guardian Angel spoke. "**YOU** are in **BIG** trouble Isabella Marie Cullen, in fact all **THREE** of you are in Enormous trouble. Angry grizzly bears are going to look tame, next to what is waiting for you when we **ALL** get back home." My sisters and I cringed away, from those words and the look our hearts gave us.

At my hearts frozen glare, I spoke the only words that could possibly save me and my sisters from our current assigned fates. "I love you." Hope rose within me, as my hearts eyebrow twitched.

My Guardian Angel snorted, as he smirked. "You need to tell that to Carlisle & Esme. **THEY** are the ones, that are actually truly pissed with you three right now. Not **US**."

My Sisters and I had lost all our hope now, as I heard the same thought pass through all our minds together as one.

_"__**FUCK**__**!**__ WE ARE SSSSSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO __**DEAD**__!"_

* * *

**General Answer, To A Posted Review For ****Twilight Ninja**.

_Review_ by **Jebest4781**. decent preview here but doesn't give much at all so yeah

_**My Answer =**_True and that is the point of it. It does give you enough if you pull a Kakashi and look underneath, the underneath. But to be truly honest, this chapter is mainly all about my Authors Introduction . That sets out and lays down the rules for this particular Story & World.

_**Reviews**__ are the currency of my negations, when it comes to getting another chapter posted._


	3. Ch 1 Trails, Torments and FUBAR

_**Disclaimer.**_

_**I do not own Twilight or Naruto and DO **__**NOT**__** claim to. This is just a fun idea I came up with, that I thought would be cool. So I am going to write it. Any elements that are mine in this story, can be used by anybody as long as you make them look **__**COOL**__**.**_

* * *

**Ch 1 Trails, Torments and FUBAR****.**

Naruto's Morning So Far?

Naruto's day at the school started with Kurama laughing his ass off at the Blonde. That laughter had only increased, when Naruto entered the Reception of Forks High School and came face to face with a very dangerous creature by the name of Miss Cope the Receptionist.

"_Why me? Seriously what did I ever do to deserve this?"_

Naruto Namikaze recognised the tell-tale signs immediately in the older women, having been intimate with this particular drawback of being a "Chakra Monster", the sexual attraction & high arousal of the opposite sex. The Humans of this World had absolutely no idea, at just **WHAT** caused or governed certain reactions within their body from outside stimulus. Naruto Namikaze however having studied under Ibiki Morino & Inoichi Yamanaka along with studying the mysteries of Chakra, knew exactly what was causing the current reaction in the predator in front of him. The MORE Chakra you have, the **MORE** it provokes the animalistic tendencies of attraction in others.

Put simply Kami had cursed the Blonde with rabid Fan Girls attracted to his Huge Chakra Capacity, or maybe it was the Devil, Karma, Destiny or Fate. Either way the case for Eternal Damnation that Naruto Namikaze had been building today, started with this item added upon that list.

However given the whole **HATE** the Nine Tails agenda & crusade, mostly rational thought overrode & cancelled out this effect back in the Leaf Village. Well that was until Naruto had changed the perception of the Villagers and moved out of the Shadows as the Fourth Hokage's Legacy. After that the Young Blonde found himself relying on the Daily Survival techniques, taught to him by Itachi Uchiha years before as one of his ANBU trainers. Add into the Mix that quite a few MILF's in the Leaf Village had a serious Fan Girl crush on his Father…

_Inoichi Yamanaka counselled Naruto Namikaze every Tuesday & Thursday at 3 pm, after the incident when Shizune & Anko tried to jump his bones. During which time Tsunade held him down as a very Feral looking Hana & Tsume Inuzuka closed the door to the Hokage's Office, blocking off the outside World along with any potential escape routes for the Blonde. Naruto had many things in his life to both Thank and Kick the ass of his Mother & Father for. However after that day Naruto Namikaze would be forever grateful to the Yellow Flashes personal notes on Time / Space Manipulation, that he had left his Son & Heir. Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze being made someone's bitch? I do not think so. Neither did the 5 Older Women, when Naruto had finished with them 4 hours later. After which the Fifth Hokage Tsunade Senju, had Inoichi teach Naruto how to channel his Bloodlust better when it came to certain things. So a quickie was less than 1 hour depending on the number of people involved._

Still all of these things combined along with his Mission History as a Ninja, meant that Naruto Namikaze was no stranger when it came to a Women's Sexual desires. However with the look upon Miss Cope first thing this morning, even **HE** felt violated to a level that went far beyond the feared **Leaf Style One Thousand Years Of Death**. Especially when the Older Women actually began drooling and started to eye-rape, as her eyes roamed his body hungrily like a raw piece of meat. **THEN** when the Blonde's extra senses kicked in and he personally felt the Lust, Sexual Frustration and Sexual Tension flowing & oozing out of the older women body? His furry pain in the **ASS** was so kind enough, to send his Vessel a Mental Picture of what the Animal in front of him was probably thinking. The Chakra Sensor mentally cringed & recoiled, because unfortunately with every ability there is a price to pay along with drawbacks. Feeling the animal LUST of someone Naruto wouldn't touch with even Sasuke's Kunai, was a steep price to fucking pay in the Ninja's humble opinion.

Having Empathic abilities was always rough, especially if your ability to feel was strong. For Naruto Namikaze it was the strongest it could possibly be, as he was now technically a Chakra Demon. Chakra being made of Life-force resonates with **ALL** Life around it. The more powerful you are with Chakra, the more it resonates within you until finally any self-control shatters. There is more in a person's Chakra than most people know and to those who could feel it like Naruto, certain things resonated within them.

_That is why the Legends & Myths about the Nine Tailed Demon Fox, always says he attacked when humanity was steeped in Evil. The fact was Kurama's ability of Empathy towards others, felt the Greed & Corruption around himself to the point that his own self-control & restraint shattered. As a result, Kurama would go into a Bloodlust Rampage until he had purged all the hate & malice from around himself and thus his own self-control returned. Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze having absorbed Kurama's Chakra & Power, now had a similar problem when it came to his own Bloodlust._

Luckily the Chakra Sensor with the help of Inoichi had already found the means to deal with this back in his birth dimension, without all the Death & Mass Property damage. **Sage Mediation** helped Naruto purge his Emotion Tank so to speak, so his Self-control remand intact. Unfortunately he had not done so recently, as he had been annoyed over the whole High School thing along with doing other projects. So the Blonde at the time discreetly activated his **Sensory & Chakra Limiter Seals** on his Bracers, to enter his Standby Mode as he called it. By cutting off and pulling back his Chakra Flow to his senses, Naruto could reduce the detection area of his Ninja Spidey Senses down to 5 ft. max. As a **PLUS** it also blocked those primal attractions, because his raw Chakra was mostly undetectable after that if you didn't know what to look for. The only drawback from a Ninja POV with doing this, came with his normal senses of Sight, Sound and Smell being also reduced & limited. However given the choice between feeling the emotions & impulses of sexually frustrated Older Women and Hormonal Teenagers for the rest of the day, **OR** not being able to Smell, See or Hear clearly for up to a mile away?

Naruto would choose to pay that price willing any day of the week, after all sometimes ignorance is **BLISS**. The Ninja did have other means of large scale Area Detection, once there were all in place within the school. So after activating his **Sensory & Chakra Limiter Seals,** the Ninja readjusted to the reduced sensory Input & Information of his Standby Mode. The Empath then concentrated on dealing with Shitstorm within, until he managed to calm it back down to a comfortable level once more. This all happened of course as his Furry pain in the **ASS**, was rolling around his cave floor in hysterics once more.

After the Chakra Sensor had managed to centre himself once again, the Ninja made a mental note **NEVER** to be alone with this women ever. As the Young Blonde coughed loudly to get the predators mind out of the gutter, the very embarrassed Ms Cope returned back to the land of the Sane and none perverted. She handed over a slip of paper, map of the school and timetable of classes. Naruto had politely thanked her as he made a strategic withdrawal, all the while covering his rear as he left the predators lair and headed off to his first class.

Naruto had chosen his lessons with care in the school. After all there is only so much you can learn from a book or from watching people from afar. Sooner or later you need to interact with them, in order to iron out the kinks in your knowledge. So the Blonde had tried to pick lessons that would serve him well for the future if he could, rather than just to simply pass the time. Language was always an important Skill to have, so he had put himself up for English, Literature and Spanish. After all he was translating from his mother tongue into a new one, so he needed to make sure that he had bridged the Language gap properly. Also seeing as how he had a New World to explore in the future, he thought he might as well begin learning other languages in order to blend in better. Spanish was one of the most popular languages according to Google, so out of limited options at the School he picked that.

The Young Genius & Prodigy had a love for new knowledge, particularly Sciences and Brand **NEW** Jutsu. So Naruto Namikaze had also put himself up for this Wolds big three Sciences of Chemistry, Biology and Physics. Having an IQ that made most of the Nara Clan weep, meant that he had already learned most of his own worlds knowledge in those areas. Being here in this World Of Technology, meant that there were new fields for him to explore and study in the future. Yet again though just like translating from his mother tongue, Naruto needed to make sure he had bridged the science gap properly too.

Last but not least, Naruto Namikaze had put himself up for Gym and one optional credit. The Young Blonde looking down at his class timetable first thing this morning, had to admit that at least on paper it didn't look too bad at all. He may be able to survive this after all or so he thought.

* * *

_Knowledge & Life lesson actually learned today? = Hindsight is 20/20 and a complete bitch called Jessica Stanley._

* * *

The highly trained Assassin actually managed to use that crudely drawn map provided, to locate his first class of the morning English. Standing outside the classroom for a brief moment, Naruto get himself mentally prepared for the torment of being the new 'shiny' to begin. The Warrior that had faced down daily Monsters, Demons and even the occasional God from time to time, without so much as a batted eyelash. Took that final breathe of Hope received from his timetable and knocked on the door.

As the new student presented his attendance slip to Mr Mason first thing, the Chakra Sensor took a subtle glance around the English Classroom through his peripheral vision. That final breathe of hope he had just took, was then bitch slapped straight the fuck out of him nothing but grateful that he had already pulled back his Ninja Spidey Sense. The eyes of the girls had lit up like all their birthdays had come early and the eyes of the boys darkened & narrowed. Naruto genuinely felt a great sense of pity for any Empath or anyone else for that matter, with extra senses like his own who found themselves in such a place. The amount of hormones & mood swings within that room, WOULD drive a person **NUTS** within the hour.

Mr Mason had Naruto introduce himself to the class and then pointed him, towards an empty seat between a Girl with glasses and a small Asian Kid. The Chakra Sensor internally shuddered, as at that range he would be within 5 feet of both of them and be in for a rough hour of feeling whatever they did. Naruto with practiced ease at the time centred himself entirely against the oncoming shitstorm, as he walked over to the desk making sure not to make eye contact with anyone. As he moved across the room he gave off a calm demeanour, of someone who was relaxed & comfortable to the situation. Smiling slightly to his new neighbours to break tension, he pulled out a chair and sat down as he began getting his books out of his bag. Mentally preparing himself for the torture & torment to begin, the Chakra Sensor felt those around him and was actually pleasantly surprised with a Silver Lining. While they were both bursting with curiosity, they had cool & warm natures that Naruto actually found calming. After a quick introduction to each other, Naruto learned their names were Angelia Weber and Ben Cheney.

Unfortunately as with every situation that the Blonde had ever found himself in, there is always a price to pay and downside to the Silver Lining that the Devil, Karma, Fate or Destiny seem to give him on a daily basis.

First when Naruto started paying attention, as Mr Mason began to explain the course for the following year. As the Man finished it finally and truly sunk into the Blonde head, he **REALLY** was in for a rough year of boredom at least if all his other classes would be the same as this one.

Second as the class progressed, the Chakra Sensor got **VERY** annoyed as he kept feeling the curiosity keep spiking around him.

Naruto had already spotted, that both Angelia and Ben would glance in his general direction then look away quickly with the hope of not being noticed. It wasn't until the Sensor realised that he was not the centre of their focus, that he understood the situation. It seemed that he unfortunately had sat in-between two Hinata's and each were drawn to the other. To the Blonde when they glanced at each other and looked away like that, it was like someone kept poking him in the back of the head. Eventually shit like that gets to the point through human nature, that you just want to turn around and punch that fucker **FULL** in the face for it. So WHEN his fist actually formed, the Blonde made a mental note to sit on the end next lesson or whenever these two were next to him from now on.

The Former ANBU at the time, knowing he wouldn't need his full brainpower or attention. Settled down inside his mind, to start off his daily Shogi match with Kurama and began to run Tactical Scenarios through his mind using the School as enemy territory.

After the Lesson had ended, Ben tried to make idle chitchat with Naruto as they walked along to their next class. The Blonde answered him in a friendly manner, all the while skilfully redirecting Ben's questions into safer areas that gave nothing away about himself. Naruto smiled politely to people as they passed, while he walked along with Ben to their next class together American History. On the way though, they unfortunately met up with one of Ben's friends named Mike Newton.

The moment the Chakra Sensor first got within 5 feet of Mike Newton this morning, it was all he could do **NOT** to **Rasengan** his ass into oblivion. Within the **FIRE** and Demonic Bloodlust rose up immediately at the manipulative nature in front of him, when Mike first laid his eyes upon the Blonde. Then the guy opened his mouth to speak and after that, the ANBU Assassin began to plot how to get rid of the body in a "Tragic Car Crash". The Empath however rode out the waves of the violent shitstorm within, as he refocused his compass needle & pendulum back towards Ben once more. Letting that **ICE** of his calm & warm nature refill him, as the ocean of chaos within calmed back down to a comfortable level as a result. Having managed to control his impulses to purge the world of the "Prick" disease, Ben introduced the Two.

Mike Newton smiled as he introduced himself and held out his hand, Naruto took it and had to stop himself from laughing out loud as Newton tried to squeeze. Obviously in vain attempt to prove & enforce the social pecking order of things to the 'New Guy', through the preverbal pissing contest. The Ultimate Weapon that in the past had made entire Armies piss themselves just by sneezing, just smiled warmly and squeezed back a little harder than the Prick. Immediately Newton started to wince and quickly tried to withdraw his hand. After a second longer than what was probably necessary Naruto let go and chuckled, as he watched Newton out of the corner of his eye flex his fingers to get some feelings back into them. Ben who stood behind him snickered, obviously amused at the exchange and the Chakra Sensor then felt Ben's feelings towards Newton. Small town politics seem to dictate that you had to be polite to people, even if you wanted to kill the prick. As it seemed Ben wasn't fooled by Newton's nice guy act either.

"_What the hell is it about Fan Boys & Fan Girls? Which makes them try to be so manipulative and were so full of hate & malice towards those that denied or rejected them?"_

Oh how Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze hated those people. Those people which wanted & needed attention. Those people which had to be at the centre of everything. Those people who believed that **ALL** belonged to them. In short the reason Fan Girls & Fan Boys had to die was because they reminded Naruto Namikaze of Sasuke Uchiha. The Chakra Sensor could fully feel now Mike Newton's manipulative personality's, which bubbled away within him. That type of person who always asked the same questions, no matter the situation. "What is in this for **ME**?" OR the very popular "What can **YOU** do for **ME**?" That "I'm better and far more superior then you complex." That "I may not like you, but I can use you for now **THEN** stab you in the back later when I'm done."

So after the "Top Dog" contest, the three of them carried on to their next class together. With Mike firing off questions to Naruto and with the Ninja giving none committal answers in response, all the while planning Newton's future gruesome death. As they arrived at the Class, Mike & Ben went to take their seats as Naruto approached the female teacher Miss Vick's.

Karma was indeed being a cruel **BITCH** today, yes sir she was. As one furry pain in the **ASS**, began his laughter & mental pictures once more.

Again the Sexual Tension coming off the over 50's women, was oozing out of her and hit the Blonde like a ton of bricks. Naruto gave another subtle cough to get her attention **OFF** his body. During which he began planning for upping his training for his Senses, so the Chakra Sensor could get his detection area down to less than 5 inches at times. After the teacher signed his note, she had the Blonde introduce himself to the class. Naruto gave the same introduction as before and moved to an empty seat in the back. Luckily the Shinobi was alone, so he could concentrate on getting himself properly centred again after meeting Mike Newton.

Happy that his Killing urges were back under control at this time, Naruto returned inward to continue his game of Shogi with Kurama. It was time to finally wipe that smirk, **OFF** his face once and for all. Or at least until something else happened, that amused the Great Nine Tails enough at Naruto's expense of course.

* * *

_History Class, Inside Naruto's Mindscape._

* * *

Kurama yawned as he looked down onto the board, as he moved a piece with one of his tails. **"So how are you enjoying your fist day so far?"**

Naruto snorted sarcastically. "It's been **GREAT****!** I have been eye raped by TWO women in their 50's. Stuck in-between TWO love struck teenagers that can't even make eye contact with each other. All the while the Guy at the front of the class tried to bore me to death and peal paint off the walls." Naruto moved his Bishop. "**THEN** I met this Schools version of Sasuke Uchiha and had to holdback from killing the arrogant prick. Now one of those same women who wants to violate me on a level, it would take a year under a shower to become clean again afterwards. Is now trying her best to bore me to death and peal paint off the walls, all the while sneaking glances at me when she thinks no one is looking. For future reference any Identity I take up next time will be at least 21. That way I will never have to go back to school again."

Kurama chuckled & snorted. **"You have always been a hands-****ON**** type of learner for that's sure. Still I don't see why you are so against being in places like these? Well besides the boredom anyway."** The Fox smirked as he moved his Rook.

Naruto shrugged as he answered. "Jealously mainly I don't belong here they do. Their eyes are closed when mine are open." Seeing the look on the Foxes face, the Blonde explained. "These people here use basic words in order to describe what they **SEE**, when they look at themselves in the Mirror or the World around them. They use Words like Black & White, Good & Evil, Hero's & Villain's. Those Words combine together to be what they build their **Illusions Of Reality** based upon. To them Evil exists but it's only within others, Good exists but it's only within themselves. When they look at themselves in a Mirror, all they see looking back is what they want too and not what is actually there. They are Children that look at Themselves & The World around them, through Eyes that are Closed, Innocent and covered in the Lie of Black & White. The reason I'm jealous of that, is because unlike them I can't believe or even see that Black & White lie. When I look at Myself, Them and the World around me, all I **SEE** is the Truth of Grey." The Ninja moved is Knight.

Kurama looked thoughtful as he spoke. **"So the reason to just ****WHY**** you are jealous, is simply because they don't see what you do?"** The Cunning & Sly Fox moved his Gold.

Naruto shuck his head. "No". The Blonde Warrior moved a Pawn, to block Kurama's Bishop. "Dad used to say that a **Civilian** looks at the surface only, a **Ninja** looks underneath that and a true **Shinobi** looks even deeper. To the Child that looks at the Playground they see Trees, Grass, Benches, Swings & Roundabouts. When the Child looks at the School & Classroom, they see the chalkboard at the front of that class and the walls that Surround & Protect them. When they look at those walls, all they see is the plaster-boards upon the Bricks & Mortar that create it. When I look at the same things they do, I see something completely different. That there is more to that Playground, than meets the eye. That there is more to those Walls, than just simply Bricks & Mortar. When I look with open eyes I **SEE** Hope, Suffering, Blood, Pain, War, Sacrifices, Death and then Hope once more. The Truth is that there is **NO** School or Playground, because the Black & White exist in us **ALL** regardless of Age, Childhood or Innocence and we are but Grey."

Kurama chuckled, as he smirked at the Blonde. **"Well aren't ****YOU**** just the bright ray of sunshine this morning?"** The Fox calmly moved a Pawn next to his King, as not to tip his hand.

The Blonde snorted in response, as he moved his Silver. "I was speaking in Metaphors you dam walking carpet." Kurama moved his Gold and looked at his Vessel about to speak, but the Ninja cut him off with a smirk. "Before you ask Furball, a metaphor is a big word that symbolises something. Symbolises is another big word Furball and it means."

The Fox growled and cut him off. **"I know what Metaphor and Symbolise mean smartass."** Naruto chuckled as Kurama huffed.

The Blonde looked over the Shogi Board, at his inner Demon. "These people have no IDEA, just **HOW** the very action and choices they make affect those around them. To them the most important question they have is. Just where can I buy those shoes?" The Demon snorted & grinned, at the girly impersonation that his Vessel had just expertly performed. "Or like **TOTALLY**, I wonder just how fast the New Guy's Lotus can go. Whereas **ME**, I have many & far bigger problems to worry about. Like what would happen to **THEM** and this World in general, if I lose control and go Chakra Demon on it. After all compared to the World I came from, this one is **MUCH** more fragile. When **I** take any action, I can always see the consequences of the choices I make. They however can't see **SQUAT**, because in their **Illusions Of Reality** Them AND The World around them is perfect. These people permanently **LIVE** in that moment of Childhood Black & White and not just them either. From what I have seen so far, most of this World does in fact."

Kurama snorted in disgust at that. "**Humans have always been selfish creatures Naruto. If it doesn't affect them personally, then they hardly ever care Kid."** The Fox looked thoughtful, as he continued to speak. **"You know, you could have that moment of Childhood Black & White as you put it in this World Kid. After all no one here has idea about your past, what you have done or what you are. To the adults here you are just another child that's an orphan."**

Naruto narrowed his eyes, as he moved his Queen to the centre of the Board. "Do you even know, what I've been doing in the outside world? While we have been playing here & now?" Kurama shuck is head in response.

Naruto's & Kurama connection was such, that although Kurama could share Naruto's Sense's when he wanted. The Blonde also had the option to cut the Fox off, if he so wanted for privacy. Added to the fact that Kurama could now appear outside his Vessel at will in the Mansion Grounds whenever he wanted. Means that the Nine Tails no longer needed to share, Naruto's Eyes or Ears for outside information. Particularly if all he could See & Hear, was going to be a Human at the front of a classroom **BORE** him to death. Mostly Kurama will share Naruto's senses when something interesting happens or like this morning, when he was busting his Vessel chops.

Naruto began to bring his Furry companion up to speed. "Since the moment I entered this School I have gone into ANBU Planning Mode. The building that we are currently sitting in is separate from the main School Building. The distance between the two buildings door to door, is precisely 107 meters 23 cm 6 millimetres. While I was walking to this building with Ben & Mike I paced it off. This building itself is over 200 meters from the surrounding Woods to the North, South and West. To the East the distance is around 132 meters give or take an inch. Since I've been sitting here, I have created a batch of **Shadow Clones** that are now crawling above us in the overhead space inside the ceiling. Each Clone has been carrying out specific orders I gave before creating them. They have been Dispelling & Creating more Clones in order to keep me up to date with their Mission progress and to perform Secondary tasks. I now have a complete layout of this building, that is more Accurate & Detailed than any Blueprints you will find anywhere. I have Detailed & Real-time information about each classroom Above & Below, how many are in them and the exact positions of every person. I can tell you that there are 8 rooms in this building that are occupied and a combined total of 89 people in them, 10 teachers & 79 students. Out of those 89 people 58 are male, 35 are left-handed, 47 have black hair, 12 are wearing glasses, 26 are wearing rings and there is **ONE** spider climbing the window glass to my left. I can tell you exactly where each person is sitting, in relative position from myself. The average **NECK** height of each person from the ground is 4 ft. 3 inches due to their seated position. Each person within the classrooms is an average of 3 ft. apart and in Rank & File formation, running 36 degrees from East to West. The only exception to that is the classroom directly behind me which has Angelia in it. Those people are in a horseshoe formation, with Angelia sitting 224 degrees directly behind me third from the front. There is also a Janitors Closet at the end of the building with access only from the outside. My Clones have already cleared out all the tools & cleaning supplies in there and put up Seals to Bar Entrance, Prisoner Restraints and to prevent any sound from escaping." All Humour & Emotion was now gone from the Blonde Ninja's Face.

Naruto Namikaze's eyes began to grow cold. "My **Shadow Clones** have also placed Seals at strategic points over the classrooms and along the only corridor to gain access to them. I can now remotely trigger them at Will, with a simple Chakra Pulse targeted at specific locations. If I send a Chakra Pulse to my Left, then the **Smoke Seals** will release a blast of Black Cover Smoke into the classrooms and reduce visibility for all inside down to zero. If I send a Chakra Pulse to my Right, then my **Paralysis Seals** will Release that new Nerve Agent I whipped up last week. That paralyses its victim within 3 seconds depending on the amount inhaled and a person's Body Weight & Mass. If I send a Chakra Pulse Down, then the **Explosive Tags** that are NOW attached to the Gas lines that run under this building will **BLOW**. Levelling this building completely and killing **ALL** within a towering Blaze Of Fire. Lastly if I send a Chakra Pulse Up, then it will active my **Poison Gas Seals** and release DXT into the building. Which is the most Lethal & Deadly poison known to Ninja kind. That has no known antidote and Kills its victims within 3 seconds, by melting **OFF** their skin as they spasm VIOLENTLY and SHATTER their own spines. Using the real-time information I have from my Seals & Clones and using my current sitting position as a starting point. I have calculated that the most effective means to eliminate all Targets within this building, would be to use 10 Kunai tipped with Lighting Chakra to penetrate through the walls. I have already calculated each Kunai's trajectory and that they would **KILL** at least 7 people each including everyone in this classroom, with the exception of Ben Cheney & Mike Newton. From start to finish, after I have thrown the first Kunai & it hits its last target, until I throw the last Kunai & it hits its last target the time taken would be less than 0.6 seconds. After that out of those 89 people 73 will be dead which leaves me with 16 targets, to either Eliminate OR Capture/Extract for future Interrogation for Information. My **Shadow Clones** are already in Full-Breach positions above those 16 Targets, with orders to Eliminate 13 of them by Head Decapitation and Capture & Extract the other **THREE**. Myself & Clones are currently holding positions at alert status **ONE**, the moment I send out A Chakra Pulse then all **HELL** will break loose for 5 seconds. When the smoke clears, out of those 89 people only **THREE** will be left alive literally." Naruto's eyes were now Flat, Cold and without Mercy. They looked as though his Soul had left its body.

Blue eyes narrowed, to look into the Red of a Demon's. Kurama actually shivered at the look in those eyes of ANBU FOX of the Leaf. A small subtle smile began to form on the Fourth Hokage's Legacies lips. That same **COLD** smile that Minato Namikaze had, right before every single Earth, Water, Cloud and Sand Ninja **RAN** from him the moment he appeared on the battlefield.

The Former ANBU Captain & War Veteran, finished his Mission Brief. "The **THREE** I've decided to be extracted from the classrooms are Ben Cheney, Angela Webber and Mike Newton. The **Shadow Clones** have orders to relocate them to that Janitors Closet and secure them there facing each other for Onsite Field Interrogation. Given the size of the room and the amount of space within, the effect of being trapped with no escaped should start immediately. I have already decided to use Ibiki's method of the Prisoners Dilemma and split my targets into TWO, Third Person and Information. I **PERSONALLY** intend to go to work on Mike Newton, with a pair of Kunai & Blowtorch. I've decided to use Anko's favourite of pealing the skin from the prisoner, as you burn their raw flesh with an intense flame to cause maximum Pain & Screams. That's why I've had my Clones put up a **Sound Barrier** to prevent detection, so as not disturbed while I'm working. Doing this for around 10 minutes WILL plant the seeds in the **THREE** of them, of being alone and at my mercy or lack thereof. While I have the prick in extreme Physical Pain & Agony, I intend to make Ben & Angela watch to begin applying the Psychological Pressure as they are my Information Targets. Mentally breaking a Prisoner to extract information is a delicate process, with a tenable position at best. It's about the Strength & Resolve of the Prisoners mind Vs. the Strength & Resolve of the Interrogators mind. Weakness on either side will increases the Strength, Power, Position and Resolve of the other. The reason I've chosen Ben & Angelia for Information Interrogation, is because they care about each other. There's a genuine feeling of Love & Connection there, that I can exploit to break them quickly under field conditions. When you are Interrogating people that care about each other, Physical Violence is never a good idea to use against them in order to break them. Because during the Interrogation, the Moment always comes when the **Bluff** or **Call** comes into play. If the Prisoner **Calls** and the Interrogator hurts one of them, then the others **FUCK ****YOU** factor kicks in. If the Interrogator **Bluffs** and doesn't follow through after the Prisoner **Calls**, then they give away their power of the situation because the Prisoners then thinks **YOURE A ****PUSSY** and don't have the stones OR stomach for the task. That's why I personally prefer to use Ibiki's method of the Prisoners Dilemma for Torture & Interrogation, by using the Third Person approach. By going to work on the Third Person first in this case Mike Newton, I demonstrate to both Ben & Angelia that I have **BOTH** the stones **AND** Stomach for the task at hand without physically hurting them. That way neither of them want the **Bluff** or **Call** moment, because they **ALREADY** believe they have the answer to it. Instead you have turned that connection they have, from a strength into a weakness and move into Psychological Torture. Instead of the **FUCK ****YOU** it moves to the** NO ****DON'T**. After that all you need to do is slit the throat of the Third Person to demonstrate your Final Resolve and watch as your Information Targets begin to squeal. The Clones have already placed the **Lie Detector Seals** on the restraints for both Ben & Angela, to monitor their responses to questions that I've **JUST** decided to ask them." Kurama's mouth was open, as his eyebrows were raised.

It was **NOT** very often that Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze could surprise The Nine Tailed Demon Fox. After all the two knew each other on a level that went far beyond anything that was considered normal, even in the World Of Shinobi. When Kurama in that moment connected to the ANBU's Senses, to say the Fox was surprised would be an understatement. Everything was Primed & Ready just like Naruto had described to him and what's more. There was only **ONE** Thought & Feeling running through his Vessel & **Shadow Clones** at that moment, which was **KILL**. The Nine Tailed Demon Fox smiled, as Kurama realised that today might not be as boring as he first thought it would be.

**Shadow** looked up at his inner Demon over the Shogi Board. "Right now I'm **FULLY** LOCKED & LOADED, to perform a full-scale Tactical Breach of this entire building. In the proses eliminating 86 Identified Targets and to conduct a **FULL** Torture & Interrogation, all to achieve objectives that I simply made up on a whim. Does that sound like someone that should be in a School with Children or playing with them in a Playground to you?" Naruto gestured to Kurama that it was his move.

Kurama chuckled darkly at the Ninja's question. **"It all depends Naruto, on just what they are Teaching in that Classroom or the game they are playing in that Playground."** The Demon Fox grinned, as he moved his Knight to take Naruto's Rook. **"So much for a ****LOW**** profile though, if you are going to massacre this school then you're cover here will be blown. At least I get to have some fun in the future though I suppose. Just out of curiosity, what have you decided to ask those two Ben & Angelia? While you make them watch you Peal & Cook this Mike Newton alive?"** Kurama thought whatever it was it must be good. After all, his Vessel was now in full blown **KILL** MODE to find out whatever it is.

The Air & Temperature inside the cave within the Blondes mind was now Ice Cold. As the Blonde Ninja breathed, steam was being created upon the air in front of him like a heavy mist. Naruto Uzumaki leaned over the game board to answer, as Kurama the Nine Tailed Demon Fox learned forward intently to listen.

Almost nose to nose now, the Blonde spoke with a truly dead soulless look in his eyes. "Have they ever heard of Ramen? If so just where can I get it?"

_Crickets began to chirp._

Kurama the Nine Tailed Demon Fox had seen many things in his 2000 plus years of existence and met many people. Yet in that moment he could definitely say without any shadow of a doubt, that he had truly **NEVER** met anyone else like his Vessel before. The Nine Tails dropped to the floor in that instant, as the Blonde just smirked and took Kurama's Rook with his Bishop. Kurama had learned to expect the unexpected when it came to Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze. When you expect to be surprised, it's not often that you are. Yet the Young Blonde seemed to somehow always find a way. The Light & Soul returned to the Fourth Hokage's Legacies Eyes as he watched the Nine Tails pick himself back up.

* * *

_Inside Classroom C2._

During all this in the outside world within the classroom, Naruto yawned and scratched the back of his left ear. The Blonde then began to twirl his pen in-between his fingertips. To anyone that was watching, he gave the impression of being bored. However the Blonde at the back of the classroom was a Ninja and even with the slightest action one must always look deeper. The simple body gestures were Naruto's own personal code, that he had created in order to send Messages & Orders to his **Shadow Clones**.

(**New Orders**. Simulation Ended. Stand-Down to Status **THREE**. Confirm).

Naruto received the Memories of one of his Clones confirming the New Orders. The Blonde continued to twirl his pen in his fingertips.

(**New Objective**. Conceal **Smoke & Information Seals**. Remove **ALL** others. Withdraw them back to the DEN. Confirm task when completed).

A few moments later the Blonde received the memories of the **Shadow Clones** that had removed the **Paralysis Seals**, **Explosive Tags** and **Poison Seals**. They had also put back the Tools & Cleaning Supplies into the Janitors Closet. Naruto continued to twirl his pen as he issued his next Operation Directives to his Personal Army.

(**New Mission**. Prime Replacement. Prepare Plan P37. Target Blonde 2. Use CQ Concealment. Distraction On My Mark. PRIME SWITCH. Relocate To Location S. Not Drill. Update When Ready. Proceed On My Signal).

Naruto's sensitive ears heard the snicker of the **Shadow Clone** directly above his head inside the ceiling, that was relaying his orders to the other Clones. When the message was relayed on to them, the Blonde could hear the snickers of 50 Clones all around him. Naruto Uzumaki's own lips twitched, as he fought off the chuckle picturing what was about to happen. The Blonde COUGHED and twirled his pen.

(LAUGH LATER. **ZERO** Traces. GET IT **DONE**!).

* * *

_Back Inside Naruto's Mindscape._

* * *

Naruto returned his focus inward and seeing the "_I'm going to__** BEAT**__ the annoying Blonde look"_ in Kurama's eyes, began to explain. "I am who I am Furball. After you ask your first Big Question in life and get your answer, your eyes begin to open. No matter how others choose to see you after that, it doesn't matter. The only thing that matters, is how you choose to see yourself in the mirror. I've Seen & Done things that no one can truly understand or believe, especially from this World. My life has had more than its fair share, of those definite '**had to be there**' kind of moments. On the left-hand I'm a highly trained Assassin, Soldier, Warrior, Killer and Ultimate Weapon. That has taken enough lives and spilled enough blood, to drown the Deepest Ocean forever. On the right-hand I'm a Protector, Peace Maker, Builder, Prankster and Guardian that has saved countless lives with my actions, Hero to many and the Savoir of the World Of Shinobi." The Blonde shrugged. "But when I look in the mirror all I see is the Grey and that one person's Hero is another's Villain. I've Seen & Done too much, to just simply close my eyes and return to Childhood Black & White like those around me. I have too many answers about myself and the nature of other people in general, to go back to being innocent." The Nine Tailed Fox just looked dumbfounded at his Vessel. "O and by the way carpet that's **CHECKMATE**." Kurama was now cursing under his breath, as he hated loosing.

However in the 3 years he had been playing Shogi with his Vessel, he had never once won a game. The Great Nine Tails Chakra Demon would have taken that personally, if it wasn't for the fact that Naruto Namikaze is the only known person in history to take on **ALL** of the Nara Clan in a game of Shogi at the same time and WIN. Kurama had always been amazed, at just how many steps his Vessel actually planned ahead at times. It was like his Vessel & Clones were a chain of dominos, you see the first but cannot see the one behind it until it falls and knocks the next down. So on and so on until all you can see is the fallen tiles, until one steps back and looks at the pattern that is now laid out before you. BUT Kurama will beat the Blonde Smartass at Shogi one day dammit! Yes sir he will.

The Chakra Demon had never understood either how Naruto could just simply switch, from one Mind & Emotional state to another instantly like that. When Kurama felt Naruto's **KILL** mode just then, the Fox was fully expecting for Mike Newton to be cooking right now. That Kid had no idea just how close he came, to being introduced to the business end of a Kunai simulation or not. Yet in the blink of an eye, Naruto switched back to his happy go lucky self again.

Kakashi's description of _"The Leaf's Number __**ONE**__ Most Surprising Ninja."_ Actually held more truth to it, once one could see behind the curtain.

More than vexed at BOTH of these things, the Nine Tails snapped out. **"So Smartass then just why in the ****HELL**** did you even come here today? After all you could have just Cloned it in, like you used to back in your day at the Academy."** The Fox grinned, showing his GIANT set of razor-sharp teeth.

Naruto Namikaze didn't even bat an eyelash, as he answered the Fox. "UNDER **THE** RADAR FURBALL, UNDER **THE** RADAR. Back in the Leaf Village it was commonplace to see **WEIRD** shit. Shit like people walking up a wall or on top of water. Weird shit like people turning into smoke or disappearing into thin air. Seeing someone hock a fireball out of their mouths, wouldn't have drawn even a batted eyelash there. Having a Kid explode into smoke during a class at the Academy, would have been just another day at the office. True the fact it was the **Dead Last** might have raised an eyebrow or two but that's about it. In this World a person exploding into smoke in front of at least 20 witnesses, is going to cause attention. Attention I don't want to have to deal with or really need right now. While I doubt there is a reason for me to worry, I don't fully know yet what kind of physical threats there are at this School to my Clones. You know that unless I modify one, it will dispel or be destroyed when it takes even a slight amount of damage. Even one of my Modified Clones has a limit to the amount of **HITS** it can take." The Ninja paused in the explanation of his reasoning, as his fury pain in the **ASS** had another bright idea.

_Kurama pictured in his head a Fan Girl mauling of a __**Shadow Clone**__, involving those three girls this morning that called him a 'Hottie'. The image of them as they grab a hold of their 'shiny' new play thing and it explodes, THEN the aftermath of screams when they actually thought they had killed the Blonde. The Nine Tailed Fox found it to be quite entertaining, if the snicker that left his throat had anything to say about it. Naruto unfortunately watched that same image too and had to shudder as Kurama pictured the mauling in __**VERY**__ great detail. So in order to restore balance to the Universe the Ninja broke Kurama's little fantasy up, by having his __**Shadow Clone**__ hock a __**Fire Style Great Fireball**__ at them before the mauling could even begin. Naruto Namikaze actually felt a great sense of satisfaction, as he imagined the screams of the Devils Spawn._

Returning back to reality, Naruto continued. "Another reason is because I intend to stay in the area for the long-term, Decades **PLUS** in fact. In order to do that, I need to gather as much information about the people here as possible. While it can be a pain in the ass, my Clones don't **Chakra Resonate** like my Original Body does. Sending a Clone to read a person's Life-force to gain Information would be a waste of time. Added to the fact the people at this School will live here in this town for the next 50 - 80 years. They will take the places of the Adults and takeover working in & running the town. If I plant in their heads now a few ideas about myself, then it will give me more privacy in the future. Back in the Academy it was about being Invisible to the eyes of others, while I moved where & did what I wanted. By dressing up in a bright Orange Jumpsuit & Screaming loudly, everyone looked where I wanted them to see. Here in this World it's the opposite. I don't want them to look at Naruto Namikaze to closely, so if I plant in their heads now at the beginning that I'm a loner who values his privacy. Then in Twenty years' time when people ask why they don't see me around too much, they will just say he has always been like that even back in High School. You are right though once I have everything in place and eliminated all the variables, then yes I **WILL** Clone it in. Until then I will just have to man up, and be a Shinobi that Stands & Endures." Sometimes it truly sucked to be a Ninja.

Chuckling, Kurama smiled. **"You have a good point I suppose, but KID you can be a ****REAL**** smartass at times you know that? Now what in the HELL is talking your Shadow Clones so long in getting ready to pull our asses out of this fire?"**

Naruto smirked at the subtly distraction & jab, in order to gloss over another Shogi loss. "First Furball yes I know, you have told me that many, MANY times before. Usually after I bring something up that your furry ass would like to forget. Second the reason that it is taking so long, is the **SAME** reason that I need to sharpen my Skills back up for. While I have re-mastered the **Replacement Jutsu** to the point that it no longer produces smoke when I use it. I **STILL** have not got my Genjutsu Concealment sharp enough, to cover the switch and hide the shimmer. In plain English if I pull a switch without a carefully timed distraction, then someone might notice the whole fade, disappear and then reaper again thing. In other words **WEIRD** shit in front of 21 witnesses and bye-bye my low profile." Kurama snorted at that.

As he knew the layout of the classroom, just as much as Naruto did, after sharing his senses. **"Naruto you are sitting in the ****BACK**** row. Everyone else is face forward and not even looking at you. With your Stealth Skills you could slip in behind each & every one of them, to slit their throats before anyone in this room would even notice. In fact at the speed you can physically move in this World, the last person would be ****DEAD**** before the first persons head hit the table."**

The ANBU sighed & shuck his head. "Carpet there is more to life than just simply squishing a problem or situation. One must always look deeper in any situation to cover & work all the angles **FIRST**, so you do not overlook the important details. You are forgetting & overlooking the Teacher at the Front of the room CURRRENTLY facing me, that is also drooling slightly and looking me square in the eye. **LOW** profile, remember? Do **NOT** want attention because someone noticed weird shit."

The Nine Tailed Demon snorted. **"Like I said you could slit her throat, along with everyone one else and still be gone before the first head hit the table."** Going Soft, Mushy and Cuddly Kurama's ass. _"If you're in __**MY**__ way, then I say __**SQUISH**__."_

Seeing the Nine Tails solution to World Peace flash through his Mind once more, the whole _"__**KILL**__ them __**ALL**__ and let Kami decide approach." _Naruto was grateful when one of his Clones dispelled, updating him that all was set & ready.

Kurama growled out relieved. **"****FINALLY****! Now let's make like a drum Kid and BEAT ****IT****!"**

Naruto's eyes narrowed dangerously upon the Demon, as he stood up. "Kurama what did I tell you would happen, the next time I heard any form of song lyrics that came out of your mouth. That I had heard you sing Karaoke to in the past?" The Fox actually palled at the tone of his Vessel.

Feeling the grip on his personal cargo tighten once again, the most powerful of the Tailed Beasts mentally winced & answered. **"You see Kid you ****DID**** give me your word that you would never mention that again."** Although his answer was brave, Kurama began to sweat as the Blonde's eyes narrowed even further.

Cracking his knuckles and then crossing his arms, the Ninja answered. "No I actually gave you my word that if you ever sing karaoke inside of my mind again. I would first use my **Chakra Chains** to chain down your Furry Ass inside here permanently. Then I would change **MY** Mindscape to **YOUTH** your said Furry Ass, for the next **ONE** thousand years. Do we understand each other?" The Ninja began to move, preparing to weave the necessary hand signs.

Kurama nodded very quickly. **"****CRYSTAL****!"** After all some Fates one did not tempt, even a Demon.

Naruto Namikaze nodded solemnly in response, as he held out his fist. Kurama's colour returned as he reciprocated and bump fists with his tormenter err friend & vessel yea that's it friend & vessel.

Thinking about how rough his morning had been going so far. First those 'Hottie' giggling girls, second his encounter with Miss Cope "the receptionist", third trying not to punch love struck teenagers, fourth being bored to death, fifth meeting Mike Newton aka "the prick" and sixth being currently eye-raped by Miss Vicks his new History Teacher. Then **ADD** into that mix a certain furry pain in the ass's mental pictures all morning?

The Blonde made his next Tactical decision of the day. "Indeed Kurama with have an accord. Now the time has come for me to make a Strategic Withdrawal. Because I'm really starting to get the feeling of being trapped, with **NO** escape. Plus I think that the Teacher is starting to drool openly at me again, or she needs a bib for that BBQ Pork she seems to have stashed inside her desk." The Fox snorted, as he settled back down onto his haunches.

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze turned his back to Kurama, as he stepped over the Shogi Board and it disappeared. As the Blonde stopped & Kurama paused the highly trained Assassin, Soldier, Warrior, Killer, Ultimate Weapon, Protector, Peace Maker, Builder, Prankster and Guardian back flipped back onto his Inner Demons head ready for action.

Now fully in-sync with his Battle Partner, the Blonde looked down. "Ready Furball?"

* * *

_Inside Classroom C2._

Naruto returned his full attention to the outside world once more, as he yawned and put down his pen. The Ninja started to crack his knuckles, in preparation for what was about to happen. Ready & Primed, Naruto sent the Standby signal to his **Shadow Clone** above his head.

(STATUS ONE **MARK**).

The Blonde began to rap is fingers.

(THREE. TWO. ONE. **GO**).

Nothing happened not a God Dam thing, Kurama was not amused. Then a second later, the entire Classroom jumped up out of their seats and began looking around wildly for whatever the hell that was. It was a scream and not just any scream. No it was the scream a person would make the first time they saw a dead body or one of their darkest nightmares. A truly terrified shriek, which howled throughout **ALL** of the different classrooms in the building.

This was followed by a lot of …

"GET IT **OFF**!" "GET IT **OFF**!" "GET IT **OFF**!" "GET IT **OFF**!" "GET IT **OFF**!"

Then silence, eerie, soulless, silence.

Getting her wits about her in the moment that followed, Miss Vick's began to settle her students back into their seats. As the students began to look around each other, wondering just what the hell was going on as they sat back down. No one noticed that the Blonde at the back of the Class, was chuckling under his breath. When Ben looked at Naruto with the "WTF look", the Ninja just shrugged as to say "Beats me". A moment later the class was back to normal, as they picked up fight where they had just left off.

We'll all except for Naruto Namikaze, as he was no longer in the room. No the Ninja during that Shrieking Howl, had used that well time little distraction as a means to get his ass out of there. Now the Blonde was currently hanging on to a roof beam, using Chakra inside the ceiling and grinning like a lunatic to his Clones.

Kurama was confused, so he had to ask. _**"Kid what the **__**FUCK**__** was that? I know you used that scream, to cover for that Replacement Jutsu you just pulled with a Shadow Clone. But just exactly what in the name of Kami did you do? To get a reaction like that, without actually killing anybody?"**_

Naruto Uzumaki was still grinning & mentally chuckling, as he answered. _"Do you remember this morning, those three girls outside the School that called me a Hottie?"_ Kurama nodded. _"Do you remember when I said there was __**ONE**__ spider on the window?"_ The very confused fox, nodded once more. _"The __**TWO**__ have just met."_ Kurama blinked for a moment, then blinked again and started to roar with laughter.

Naruto Uzumaki had a feeling he might have to pay for that one later. But at least by then, he would have had a chance to **Sage Mediate** a little and take the edge off his** Chakra Resonance** ability.

* * *

_Presently, Forks High School Cafeteria._

* * *

"_Or __**SO**__ he had thought, Knowledge & Life lesson actually learned here today? = Hindsight is 20/20 and a complete bitch called Jessica Stanley. Believe it!"_

Immortality the word just rolled around Naruto Namikaze's head, over & over again as he looked around the lunchroom. The more that word rolled around his head, the more the word Hope did **NOT**. High School so far had been far worse, than what our Young Hero had dreaded it to be. Another word entered the Blondes mind at this point, Purgatory.

The Young Warrior had done many things over the years of his Shinobi career, that had probably put him within the very **HEAT** of the Flames Of Hell, so to speak. Though shalt not kill, was a particular Sin that the Blonde had broken several times. Being a Jinchuuriki, serving in ANBU, fighting in a civil war called Bloody Mist and his **ZERO** Tolerance Community Service policies. **ALL **meant the Soldier had broken that particular Sin and then some, before he had even turned 5. In fact Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze had the highest confirmed Kill record in Shinobi history, blowing his Fathers old record out of the water. Considering the Yellow Flash once killed 3 platoons of Iwa Shinobi in a single battle, that was quite a feat. So the question that Naruto was asking himself right now was….

"_Did he actually die in that __**FUCK UP**__ and get sent straight to __**HELL**__, rather than a different Dimension? Was he now being tortured by a group of the Devils own spawn inside Purgatory?"_

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze had started to build the **CASE** for his Eternal Damnation in this World, the moment that our Young Hero found out that there was no such thing as Ramen here. What kind of a **FUCKED ****UP** World doesn't have Ramen? All evidence suggested & proved, apparently this one. The Addict & Junkie had searched the Earth for 6 months **SOLID**, looked on every continent with a Thousand **Shadow Clones** 24/7 and **STILL** could not find a trace of his beloved Sacred Noodles dipped in broth. It was only the single fact that the Junkie still had his emergency stash of Noodles, that he didn't immediately draw this conclusion earlier. However his 5 year supply of Instant Ramen was drawing to end after almost a year. Without a means to augment that supply with outside Ramen, the Uzumaki in him realized that some serious cold turkey and rehab was in the Junkies future. Here & Now had just added to the growing list, that his ass was currently being prepared for BBQ Naruto when the Devil was finished tormenting him with his addiction.

Although all current evidence reliably pointed to this conclusion, Naruto Namikaze knew that this wasn't the case for a very good and sane reason. The simple fact that **NO** God, Spirit, Monster or Demon would be insane, crazy and stupid enough to come between an Uzumaki and the Sacred Noodles dipped in broth. Even back in the Leaf Village at the very height of the HATE, PUNISH and **KILL** the DEMON crusade of the Civilian Council along with most of the general population. **NO ****ONE** so much as scratched the Ichiraku's Ramen stand **OR** laid so much as a finger on the Father & Daughter that owned & ran it. It wasn't because they didn't want to, no sir not that at all. After all Teuchi & Ayame were setting back their noble efforts to weaken the Demon through starvation, so they could finish off what the Fourth Hokage had started.

No the reason was simple self-preservation, because it was said to be safer to take Kakashi Hatake's beloved Orange Book, then set fire to it right in front of him and then piss on the ashes. Rather than coming between a certain Blonde and Sacred Noodles or even worse, those that sold the **HOLY** Noodles. It was also said that someone had once tried to test the unwritten law of survival, only to find out that Ibiki Morino himself in fact shows more mercy to his playthings on his worse day, than Naruto Uzumaki on what was later called Ramen Tuesday. Even when his enemies tried to even past scores, they would try through **ANY** means necessary. However not once did anyone ever try to kill him by poisoning his Ramen, not even Iwa. Past experiences had already taught them, that there are some horrors worse than being eaten by the Shinigami himself.

Ramen Tuesday proved and reaffirmed that belief very strongly for many, hate & revenge maybe blind, BUT there is an actual limit to stupidity. **NO ****ONE** was that stupid, not even Madara Uchiha if the rumour about the REAL reason he left the Leaf Village was indeed true. So Naruto KNEW that although he may have pissed one or two Gods off over the years, not even the Shinigami would risk the Legendary Wrath of the Uzumaki Ramen addiction. So although Purgatory may have been a possibility right now, the Devil placing himself within hands reach of the Blonde. While he stoked the Fires Of Hell getting ready for BBQ Naruto, was probably not what was going on. Especially when the God's themselves, had already recognised Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze as a Bad Ass Mother Fucker in the past.

At that last thought Naruto Namikaze looked up to the cafeteria roof, thinking about that. It was most certainly **TRUE** that in his day as a Shinobi, the Young Warrior had probably PISSED **OFF** a good portion of the Gods and then some. Those bastards always had a chip on their shoulder, until Naruto had knocked them flat on their ass. Being whooped by a being you consider inferior to yourself, was always an experience that the powerful never forgot or forgave. Unfortunately for them, they all found out first-hand that when you're dealing with a person that will fight the good fight to his last breathe and beyond. Most of them tended to try and bite off more than they could chew, when it came to Blonde's with the name of Namikaze or Redhead's for that matter with the name of Uzumaki. Toss Senju into the mix and the belief amongst most of the higher beings was that Kami was stoned when she created the mould for Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze. Either that or she had a really fucked up plan in mind, that was more than just mysterious and the word crazy didn't even begin to come close.

Naruto had sent more than his fair share of Gods or Wannabe's from the Physical Plain over the years and most had always sworn revenge for their defeat. The Blonde had recently been thinking that ending up in a World **WITHOUT** his beloved Sacred Noodles, was a definite act of one or more of those cruel bastards. It was common practice for those fuckers to give a man their wildest dreams and then watch as it turned to ash in their very mouths. However Immortality was never a dream of the Blonde's and a World without Ramen and populated with Fan Girls, was Naruto Namikaze's worse fucking nightmare. That revenge plan had **ALL** the subtlety & finesse of a **Tailed Beast Bomb** to nuts and Naruto would probably call it an "Uchiha Plan" not a "Divine Entity Plan". So while the Blonde was under **NO** illusion that those same Gods he had sent packing over the years were NOW laughing their asses off at him, he highly doubted that they were the ones responsible for his current stint. Although all thoughts of the Sacred Noodle aside, Naruto had **NOT** over looked the irony of a Chakra Entity arriving in a World were life itself was slowly dying. So maybe there was a case for Divine Intervention after all, that had the subtlety & finesse of an "Uchiha Plan".

At the thought of the Clan with a nasty case of pick-eye, Naruto had originally believed that he may have been under the effects of a Genjutsu when he first awoke inside that ditch almost a year ago. After all when a person plummets from over a thousand feet in the air, traveling at a speed that was **WELL** above Mach 6, giving off a sonic boom & flame trail like a comet as they fell and then stopped suddenly by **SOLID** fucking Earth. One does tend to be confused & disorientated, when one awakes inside a crater that is a hundred feet across and wondering to himself.

"_Just where the __**FUCK**__ am I?"_

Especially shortly after when one almost gets run over by a two ton metal thingy, that later turned out to be a Transport Truck just outside the town of Forks. Add into the mix that shortly before hand Naruto was fighting the **TWO** worse cases of the Uchiha Clans pink-eye and it was reasonable at the time to believe some kind of Genjutsu was at play. If it wasn't for the fact that Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze had made DAM FUCKING **SURE** that he had tossed Sasuke & Obito into an oblivion from which there was no escape. Then the case for Genjutsu as the reason behind his current stint inside Purgatory, would definitely be in his top three right now. Of course for that to be a serious consideration, then the Blonde would have to overlook several significant facts like.

A, Kurama would now be roaring like a **MAD** fucker possessed at the thought of being under the influence or control of an Uchiha once again. Instead of laughing his furry ass off at Naruto, like he had been most of the morning.

B, Naruto's own extra Ninja Sense's that cannot be fooled by Genjutsu period. Alter all the Blonde could sense Chakra, and a long-term Genjutsu is nothing but Chakra. The fact that the **ONLY** active Chakra source on the face of the planet was the Blonde's meant, that either Kurama was evening the score for Thumper or there was no Genjutsu. Again as a revenge plan Naruto knew that Kurama would rather shave his Tails, then stoop so low as to use a "Uchiha Plan". Plus stupidity did have its actual limit and Kurama watched Ramen Tuesday with his own eyes and he most certainly wasn't that stupid.

C, ANBU Training & Conditioning to prevent access or influence from Genjutsu. Combine the facts that Naruto was a Jinchuuriki, ANBU member and a Clan / Kage heir. Certain elements within the Leadership of the Leaf Village wanted to make DAM sure that the Blonde could never be tricked or coerced to anyone else's side. So the Third Hokage had introduced Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze to **TWO** of his Teachers pretty early, to make sure that didn't happen, Ibiki Morino & Inoichi Yamanaka. Between the TWO of them and after many years, Naruto had developed some of the most strongest Mental & Physical defences most of the T & I department had ever seen. Some say that the Blonde was even able to breakout of Itachi's Uchiha's **Tsukuyomi** Genjutsu once. Not to mention some papers discovered after the fall of Danzo & Root, showed that the War hawk had tried many times to use his stolen **Sharingan** on Naruto to no avail as well.

So between the complete **END** of the Uchiha Clans pink-eye, ANBU training that made Navy SEAL Hell-Week look like a week at club med, extra Ninja Spidey sense's that couldn't be fooled and the fact his Furry pain in the ass had been an even more Furry pain in the ass. Naruto Namikaze could rest assured that his current situation & surroundings that he returned to after Mediating for last lesson, were in fact very **REAL** without the influence of any outside source.

The giggles of Jessica Stanley as Mike Newton said something that was **NOT** funny, made it official for case 2 Divine Intervention. Some Fucker up there really hated him right now, there was **NO** other option. One of those Cruel Bastards had stooped so low as to use an 'Uchiha plan'.

"_Well this __**SHINOBI**__ wasn't going down without a __**FIGHT**__**!**__ Human Nature & Physics one-o-one, demanded some serious causality backlash for this. For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Some Fucker out there is to blame for this and when I find out just __**WHO**__…"_

The Teenage group that were currently talking to the Blonde and in some cases giggling to Naruto Namikaze all stopped. As a sinister chuckle left the lips of the new "Hottie" and a small subtle, ironically satisfied smile appeared upon his lips. The Blonde nodded to himself, as he had reached the source for his current stint inside Purgatory and the means of reaction he would use to settle the score. So just **WHO** had Naruto Namikaze decided was responsible for his current situation of pain & torment?

Well in all fairness the Young Blonde had to admit that there were several suspects to this crime.

First there was himself, after all Naruto could have followed Kurama's piece of advice to say **"Fuck It."** Then pulled a Ninja and disappeared into thin air before he got sent to do his time inside Purgatory. However seeing as he was personally suffering at the moment, Naruto had decided that suspect one was already being punished enough.

There was also suspect two Chief Of Police Charlie Swan. As he was the one who decided to check up on a Kid living in the middle of nowhere, then sent said Kid to serve time. However given when Naruto was younger, the Blonde would have liked nothing better than for someone to check up on him or any child in general that was alone for the matter. Meant that Charlie Swan was a good man, that cared about others beyond his duty as a "Keeper Of The Peace". So although suspect two was most definitely guilty in this, the fact the Chief Of Police was a good man that cared about his community unfortunately meant one thing. Naruto Namikaze's own personal "Rulebook" gave him automatic & **FULL** Diplomatic Immunity from this crime, as well as **ALL** other crimes past, present and future.

No before **BOTH** of these suspects and guilty parties, there was another from the very beginning. A definite source of this, that could be both named and **WOULD** be punished severely.

"_So who is responsible for this? __**JENKS**__ was the man responsible for this. He was the person one of those Cruel Bastards upstairs were using to get to him. Now all that remains is to decide what to do to that fucker for this?"_

Now one might Question how the extreme Ramen Junkie, who was currently going through severe cold turkey. Could actually claim Jenks as the reason & guilty party, in making him front and centre of this teen popularity contest he was currently starring in. All while having a **SHITSTORM** of emotions, instincts and Demonic Bloodlust swirl, rage and hammer him from all sides within. Because unfortunately right now Mike Newton, Jessica Stanley, Lauren Mallory, Angelia Weber, Ben Chaney, Eric Yorkie and Tyler Crowley were all inside that magical 5 ft. range.

Answer when Naruto was setting up his living identity for the long-term, Jenks was the one who suggested the whole "Minor with Sealed Records angle." The reason was simple because you didn't need a detailed Legend to go with it (Legend = Backstory for the details of the created Identity). So you didn't need to legally prove squat with papers, because you could just say "Minor". Then use your forged documents, for when you wanted to do stuff that needed a legal older age. Add in the "Emancipated" part and under the law you were a Legal Adult and didn't need the fake documents for anything. With the "Trust Fund" part you had a visible means of income, so you could spend a shit load of cash and no one would question where you were getting it from. If people asked questions you had the perfect deflection in saying "Sealed within the Courts".

The best part was that the Law Itself could not check your story, simply because they legally couldn't do it. Naruto Namikaze and even Kurama had to admit at the time, Jenks was a cunning bastard to come up with that. Putting it all together meant that no matter who looked or how many looked, there was literally nothing to find and it was perfectly normal and LEGAL. All you needed for that cover story, was a certificate from a Judge and for Jenks that was easily forged no problem.

* * *

_Seattle Flashback, 3 Months After Ground Zero._

* * *

No the problem came from when the Blonde went to see Jenks that first time, because he was not wearing any form of **Transformation Jutsu**. Although Naruto wanted to keep the whole "Chakra & Jutsu" under the radar to avoid Area 51, Anal Probes and Men In Black Suits. He also wanted to motivate this man to the point, that Jenks would rather swallow and then shit **SOLID** bricks of Razor Blades & Barbwire, then speak one word about the man he would come to call "_**Shadow**__"_.

The Ninja was also curious as to what would happen, if a Human from this dimension experienced some of his capabilities in **FIRST** person for the long-term also. Unfortunately for Jenks that meant the only option for Naruto to achieve these tasks at the time given his Chakra Control Issues, was to use his very own Genjutsu he created called **Demonic Viewing Forrest Of Corpses**. That same Genjutsu that Ibiki Morino placed within the **Forbidden Scroll** personally, because if the rumour was true if fucked **HIM** up, hence the S Rank.

_Inoichi had set Naruto the project of creating a Genjutsu, that a Huge Chakra monster like himself could use. When the ANBU trainee went back to his Teacher a week later and claimed success, both Blondes then asked for a volunteer enter the Sadist of the Leaf Village Ibiki Morino. ANBU FOX along with a little extra help from a certain Chakra Demon locked in his gut, proceed to go to town on the Head of the T & I division. Rumour has it that an hour later, Anko Mitarashi found Ibiki in his office clutching a Stuffed Teddy Bear and rocking himself back & fourth in his seat. On a side note the next day, Ibiki Morino ordered the ANBU to Black Bag every Camera Seller & Film Developer in the entre Leaf Village and Land Of Fire looking for "classified military secrets". Also for some strange reason, Anko Mitarashi apparently got a promotion and 3 months paid vacation while the Black Bag operation was in effect. Rumour also had it, that even 2 months later Ibiki would flinch every time ANBU FOX entered the same room._

So after testing out one of his current theories about this new World, Naruto Namikaze got himself a **VERY** motivated "go-to-guy" out of the experiment.

Thinking about it now, maybe Jenks was a little bit **TOO** motivated by the stranger in his office that day. Who could apparently make you see & feel anything he wanted too, while he placed you in the scariest fucking forest you ever saw surrounded by his past victims as dead bodies. After all if a Man can do **THAT**, then what the fuck else can he do? If it was **YOU** personally that had the attention of such a man, would you really want to find out? Especially when that stranger knew the names and ages of your wife & children, where you lived, had pictures of your home and even of your family while they slept including yourself. When the Man looked at you square in the eye, as his iris changed colour from Blue to that of Red slits with look of a Predator. Would you talk about "**Shadow**" given all these facts OR would you go above & beyond to keep that Man VERY happy. So at least you were more valuable to him ALIVE than **DEAD**, like all those others. Especially given the fact, the Man was loaded and paid you very well for your services. No a man in Jenks line of work followed their "Rulebook" and kept his mouth shut while cashing in, with just the vague hope that one day he wouldn't be considered expendable. When one serves at the right-hand of the Devil, one is supposed to be immune after all.

So from then on whenever Priority Client Number 2 went to Jenks, the man did his very best at any task given in the hopes he would get out of the situation alive for just one more day.

So when Jenks was cooking the books so to speak, he looked at the Blonde at face value with that extra knowledge of something more behind it. Naruto Namikaze looked young enough that he could pass as a 15 – 25 year old without a problem. So the perfect cover story for his Client would be one that was young, with as few details as possible. Jenks got the feeling when talking with "**Shadow**", that this wasn't his first time playing a different role. How was Jenks supposed to know, that the Blonde had the Ability to shape shift using his personal **Shadow Transformation Jutsu**? That he could look like fucking anything or anyone? Naruto wanted to keep the true extent of the whole "Chakra & Jutsu" under the radar, so while Jenks didn't know much he knew more than most.

* * *

_Presently, Forks High School Cafeteria._

In fairness the story Jenks & Naruto **HAD** cooked up, worked very well until prime suspect number two the Chief Of Police entered the picture. That self-satisfied smile increased on Naruto's face, as the teenage audience around him began to shuffle at the silence and slowly edge away for the new guy. The expression seemed to say, are you feeling lucky? Obviously at the subtle distance most was putting between themselves and the crazy Blonde, the answer was most definitely **NOT**. Especially as the silence that hung over the group, began to grow with an underlined current of tension.

Thinking back to the beginning when Naruto had heard his options from his Lawyer, Forger, Banker, Business partner and "go-to-guy" the Blonde wanted a second opinion. So the Young Ninja broke back into the Seattle Library and went to consult his Holy Google upon this matter. Naruto & Clones searched the Internet for all English Law, regarding the finer points of the story He & Jenks had cooked up. Please not the keyword there ENGLISH Law. As it turned out with that, Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze had broken rule **ONE** when it came to information gathering "Assumption". The Assumption that USA and UK law, was one in the same and the Mother of this Fuck Up. Under ENGLISH Law, you could leave School and not be bothered by that kind of stuff at the age of 16. So Naruto decided to go with the 17 starting point, to place him in the magical age range of 16 – 18 that was a basic legal black hole there. Although America he later found out spoke English although just barely, that was where the similarities between the TWO started and ended. After that there were **BIG** fucking differences that a certain Lawyer never mentioned to a certain Blonde.

The reason J Jenks was so good at his profession, was because he was Lawyer that Practised & Specialised in International Law. Knowing the subtlest differences between States, Federal, Countries and Continents, Jenks could do a lot of things and make a lot of money for both himself and clients.

So when Naruto asked Jenks if this story would fly well under ENGLISH Law. The Balding Man that was sweating very heavily at the time, as his Client sharpened his sword in his office nodded quickly, **EXTREMELY** quickly. Probably dancing inside his head, at the idea of having almost 5000 miles between himself and Priority Client Number 2. That was of course until the whole Chief Of Police asked for School Records incident and Naruto then decided to kill Jenks. The Blonde frowned as he remembered this, the fact that J Jenks had already been punished for this crime.

"_Stupid practise what you preach. Stupid Nindo. Stupid __**NO NO**__ List__. Next time I'm going to __**ADD**__ to that Fuckers punishment for this. __**CRAP**__**!**__ These people are looking at me like I'm crazy. Code 5 plan B."_

Mentally nodding to himself and returning back to reality & sanity. The Addict & Junkie pushed the Ramen shakes away once more, as he used the Tried & True method for deflecting & defusing situations like these that he learned from his Big Brother.

Cocking one eyebrow the Ninja turned to Newton. "Did you say something?" At the Sight & Sound of Mike Newton choking on his soda, as Ben slapped him on the back. The tension was gone, as the Devil Spawn began their giggling once more.

Immortally & Purgatory may go hand in hand, but Naruto Namikaze could no longer see Hope now. Although he had identified those cruel bastards upstairs, who were going to receive another ass kicking **IF** he ever met them again. The Devil, Fate, Destiny and Karma were **ALL** going to get a **Rasengan** up their stuck up **ASS** for this. Maybe even Kami too, if she didn't have a **DAM** good reason for all the shit the Young Blonde had to deal with in his life so far. Today had just been another item upon the very long list, which had better have the MOTHER of all reasons for in the "Grand Scheme" of things.

So as Mike Newton scowled once more to the "New Guy", much to Naruto Namikaze's personal amusement. The Blonde thought back to how He & Kurama had parted ways earlier.

* * *

_Flashback at Mediation Location._

* * *

Seeing his desired destination in the distance through the Trees, Naruto Namikaze began to move forward deeper into the forest. As he passed a tree stump, he picked up a package that had apparently just been left there in the middle of nowhere.

A confused Kurama spoke. _**"What the hell is **__**THAT**__**?"**_ After all one does not simply walk through a forest and find things gift wrapped.

The Blonde answered. _"You remember when I said my Clones were doing Secondary tasks?"_ The Fox was confused but nodded, the Ninja mentally shrugged & continued. _"Well when I was picturing going to work on Mike Newton with a pair of Kunai & Blowtorch, I got hungry. So I had one of my __**Shadow Clones**__ make me a Cold Turkey Sandwich. Then leave it here for me, for after I was finished with going to work on Mike Newton."_ All Kurama could do was shake his head at his Vessel.

The Blond smirked to himself, as he walked towards a large tree. Standing before one of the oldest trees in the forest, Naruto knocked the side of the trunk. The tree opened up to reveal a **Shadow Clone**, sitting in the now visible hollow of the thousand year old Cedar. The Clone then dispelled to give its memoires back to its creator, as Naruto took its place and started to eat his sandwich.

After also receiving that Clone Update, Kurama gave his thought about his Vessels & Clones domino effect. _**"Seriously Kid, just how many steps do you think ahead at times? First there was that Spider and then that Sandwich. Now you have enough Seals on this place, to hold off anything thing that can actually be thrown at it."**_

Naruto took a bite and answered. _"That's why I am still alive. You think 5 moves ahead while I actually think 4 and get the job done in THREE. It's also why you have never beaten me in Shogi. Let me guess usual rematch tomorrow, __**YOU**__ lose, __**I**__ Win right?"_ Sniggering to himself, the Tactical Genius chewed getting ready to swallow.

The Chakra Demon gave his answer. _**"Tomorrow your ass is **__**MINE**__** Smartass. Now if you are just going to spend the next hour humming to yourself then I am going hunting. I will be back later to watch that masters class you signed yourself up for. You know because unlike you, I **__**CAN**__** actually come & go from this school as I please. Without the need to worry about my stand in & stunt double being gang raped by a bunch of Rabid Fan Girls!"**_ Naruto actually choked on his Cold Turkey, as Kurama provided a very colourful mental picture to **FULLY** illustrate his point.

Naruto's eyes flashed open and he coughed, as he felt Kurama leave his body and return back to the Mansion Grounds. Using the **Summoning Seal** array the Fuinjutsu Master had set up there for him. The Blonde knew why the Fox had just gone off like that, that bastard always had been a sore loser. Proved by being petty and rubbing in the fact, that Naruto was stuck here while he wasn't before he departed. Thinking about what Kurama had just said, felt like Karma herself had just bitch slapped the Blonde once more today.

So of course Naruto Uzumaki decided, Karma herself should not be allowed to get away with this. If the Blonde was going to be tormented for the rest of the day, then it was only fair he should share the experience with that furry pain in the ass as well. Revenge must be sought and justice delivered swiftly, Uzumaki style. _"The Devil In Orange"_ as he was once known as, during his time in the Ninja Academy. Made the hand sign, that the Ninja was well known for throughout the World Of Shinobi.

"**Shadow Clone Jutsu.**" As the smoke cleared, creator & created looked upon one another. The Warrior's body position changed, to that of someone that meant serious business and war. "Operation Thumper, show the enemy **NO** mercy." The Clone grinned back, with a look that spoke the true volume of its current intent.

Making another hand sign, before bursting into smoke and leaving in its place? A small, brown, rabbit, which was truly a thing of pure innocence & cuteness. That would make even Anko Mitarashi herself, squeal in the agreed fan girl manner before glomping the poor unfortunate bastard to death. As the rabbits nose twitched, the _"Devil In Orange"_ spoke his final command. To this unholy creation, he was about to unleash upon that furry pain in the ass in the name of Karma. "STICK **EM**!" Upon which a dust trail appeared as true Chaos incarnate, was released upon this world without restraint.

Besides the Prankster figured he would probably need the pick me up later. So when the memory of "Thumper Vs. Chump" round 226 arrives, Naruto Uzumaki would have considered them both even today in the "Grand Scheme" of things.

* * *

_Presently Forks High School Cafeteria._

Unfortunately today Karma it seemed, believed that acting in her name merited payback once more. Or she believed that the reaction Naruto had used to even that particular score with his friend & furry companion, was far more than one-sided and needed to be rebalanced once again. Either way _"The Devil In Orange's"_ punishment, was waiting for him back at the School. When he returned & switched places with the Clone left behind earlier and its memory's returned to its creator once more and brought with it? What happens when one of the true Devils Spawn, sees its new 'Shiny' for the first time.

"_Hindsight is definitely 20/20. So never leave a __**Shadow Clone**__ unattended here, because they meet a complete bitch called Jessica Stanley while you are gone."_

Blonde shuddered at the thought, Jessica Stanley spoke. "Are you cold? Want to come and sit beside me, next to the radiator?" Spawn smiled widely while batting her eyelashes and tapped the seat next to her that was empty, away from Ben & Angelia. At the sight and feelings that rose up within, the Blonde Ninja mentally raised his right-hand into the air and said his personal pledge upon such a topic & issue.

"_My Name is Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze and __**I**__ am a nice Shinobi and Chakra Demon. __**NOT**__ a mindless Torturing & Killing machine. If I am to change this image, I must first change myself. These Pricks & Bitches must actually do something to qualify for __**ZERO**__ Tolerance, before I can actually __**KILL**__ them."_

Naruto Namikaze had a small issue when it came to his Bloodlust which was time. Although the Chakra Sensor could maintain self-control through **Sage Meditation**, it wasn't an actual cure. It merely gave him time, before his self-control broke and out came the big bad FOX. A side-effect of the Original Sealing, performed by his father Minato Namikaze that had unforeseen consequences. The reason for the unforeseen was because of the actions of the Civilian Council, on one of their annual 'Fox Hunts'.

_During that time the MOB had gotten very close to putting the Blonde's head on a Pike in the Town Square. Which in turn triggered the Fourth Hokage's self-defence mechanism, within his Legacies Seal to protect __**IT**__! Problem was that Naruto Namikaze was too young at the time, to pull on the power of the Nine Tails without side-effects. Hence the unforeseen as one of the safeguards inside his Sons Seal, was broken to protect & save him. Being exposed to the Demons __**PURE**__ Chakra at that Age & Time, had made a permanent impact on the Blonde's mind & psyche that could not be undone._

After that Naruto Namikaze had to find a way, to channel the Bloodlust he now possessed productively without losing it and going Jinchuuriki Mode on an ally. Hence the creation of his **ZERO** Tolerance & **NO NO** list with the help of Inoichi & Ibiki. Later with the "Help" of Anko, Naruto found another way to deal with it productively. Still the Blonde had to periodically satisfy his Primal Bloodlust or run the risk of losing it and going Chakra Demon on anything that moved within 50 miles. Even more so now as He & Kurama had merged their Life-force together and the Blonde had lost that fundamental emotional anchor of his friends.

**THREE** Months.

That was Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze's absolute limit between **KILLS**, or what Anko and the others had later called 'Sack Venting or dinner & bondage'. It was actually pretty close right now towards the end of his current Bloodlust Cycle, maybe he could hold it off for one more week given the current shitstorm within. The former ANBU had already done a lot of looking into most of the Criminal Underworld here, so when he found out about so called 'Organised Crime'. The Chakra Sensor with a temper problem also found his stress reliever. Focusing fully on a Target, as the technical Chakra Demon played with his food so to speak. Most certainly reset the Blondes emotional state & demon urges back down to zero. Obviously he needed to go and blow **OFF** some of his current tension and build up. However until he had the opportunity to properly and fully vent later…..

"_**NO**__! __**BAD**__ Naruto!"_

With left-hand mentally raised this time.

"_My Name __**IS**__ Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze and I __**AM**__ a nice Shinobi and Chakra Demon. Not a mindless Torturing & Killing machine. If I am to __**TRULY**__ change this image, I must first change myself. These Pricks & Bitches must actually __**DO**__ something to qualify for __**ZERO**__ Tolerance, before I __**CAN**__ actually KILL them or Peal, Gut and Cook."_

Happy that his killing urges were back under control at this time, Naruto cocked another eyebrow. "Did you say something?" Ah tried & true, oh yes so tried & true indeed.

The Chakra Sensor felt the annoyance & rejection peek throughout his body, as Jessica sucked the preverbal lemon and the compass needle inside his Life-force span around & around widely. The Blonde also felt the relief, the joy, amusement, smugness and happiness that swirled around within as that same compass needle turned too. As the Fire & Ice of the natures flooded the Blonde and swirled to create the shitstorm, the Chakra Sensor internally held onto himself as he rode out each wave hammering at him from within. But the Greed & Malice that the Ninja felt, as the compass needle pointed over at Jessica, Lauren, Tyler and above all Mike Newton. Filled the Blonde and technical Chakra Demon, with a burning and undeniable **FIRE** to purge them completely & utterly from this world into oblivion. The Ninja's hand twitched with practised ease, to pull out a Kunai from thin air or call up his swirling ball of death & Chakra boom boom.

"_I will ask again, seriously just __**WHAT**__ the hell is it? That makes Fan Boys & Fan Girls, become so filled with this much Hatred & Malice along with that much __**EVIL**__ Intent?"_

Answer the reason that Mike, Jessica, Tyler and Lauren were going to die right now, was because they were manipulators of people. Predators who prayed on the weak for their **OWN** gain, with no conscience about what damage actually got done to others. Simply because as long as they got what they wanted out of them, then these fuckers TRULY did **NOT** care just who or what got in their way. Naruto Namikaze however, managed to control his impulse to purge the world of the "Pricks & Bitches" disease, as he mentally recited his personal pledge once more.

The Empath rode out the waves of the violent shitstorm within, as he refocused his compass needle & pendulum back towards Ben & Angelia. Letting that **ICE** of their calm & warm natures refill him, as the ocean of chaos calmed back down once more to a comfortable level as a result. Again mentally grateful for the hundredth time today, that there were at least a couple of people in this school that were not petty or manipulative just for personal gain. Naruto was actually feeling a little guilty right now about the idea, of almost going to work on Ben & Angelia for Information earlier.

True if he **HAD** to, he still would in the name of the greater good or more importantly the Sacred Noodle. Still he would probably feel a little bad for it afterwards, for at least a couple of minutes. Thinking about his Tactical Simulation earlier, Naruto Uzumaki began to wonder just what his official mission briefing would be like? **IF** he had actually been assigned his current situation, as a **REAL** C Rank Mission.

* * *

_Fantasy, Leaf Village Hokage's Office. _

* * *

Naruto Uzumaki had appeared before the Hokage's' desk, in his patterned Storm Flash. Of course he immediately ducked to avoid the Sake Bottle, roll to the left to avoid the stapler, jump up to avoid the flying pig, and flip & land into a crouch to avoid the Poison Tipped Senbon, grinning that trademark smirk.

Bright & chipper as usual. "Moring Granny."

Tsunade of course was not amused. "**BRAT** what the HELL have I told you about calling me **GRANNY**! Now tell me what you want before I punt you to the other side of the dam Village?!" The Hokage began to crack her knuckles threateningly.

Standing out of his crouch, the Blonde rolled his neck & shoulders as he placed TonTon onto the floor safely. "I think I will just take a pick." Said Ninja simply closed his eyes, and reached forward and placed his hand into the piles of **Mission Scrolls** on the desk. Moving his hand around inside, he grabbed a hold of a Scroll and pulled it out. Then tossed it towards his Commander & Chief. "I'll take that Mission today." Said superior caught the Scroll, then opened and began to read it. Then proceeded to grind her teeth together, as the anger began to rise within before she blew. Sensing Mount Tsunade about to explode, Naruto opened his eyes as he put his hands out palm up. "Calm down Granny geez you KNOW me. Whatever it is I can handle it. What exactly is it anyway?"

Tsunade sighed, as she pinched the bridge of her nose. "Brat do you know how much paperwork is involved for **ME**, when creating a standard **Mission Scroll** like this? Just exactly how many forms **I** have to fill out or go through, before it even gets made? Analyse data, Skills assessments, risk assessments, Shinobi assessments, compatibility assessments, rosters, groupings, Intel reports for the region, pricing for the contract and **THEN** the final 50 pages to make it an official mission? Do you have any idea how long that takes? Do you?"

The Blonde held out the peace sign. "Why do you think the First Hokage created his **Wood Clone Jutsu**? Or the Second Hokage created the **Shadow Clone Jutsu**? Or the Fourth Hokage created the **Multi Shadow Clone Jutsu**? Come to think of it, that probably explains why the Old Man started to pull his hair out for the last ten years. When he couldn't make any more clones like he used to able to, when he first got that job." At the end Naruto Uzumaki was rubbing his chin, nodding to himself in thought.

The Fifth Hokage's eyebrow began to twitch once more. "Unlike **YOU**, Grandfather, Granduncle and Minato, the rest of us actually have Chakra Reserves & Jutsu Backlash limits to worry about. Not all of us can just spit out SOILD fucking Clones like GUM balls, as you bastards can. As for Sarutobi Sensei, he **ONLY** started to pull his hair out when a certain Blonde bastard started to take Missions for the Village. Do you know why? Do you?"

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze actually did know **WHY** = FUBAR, but just whistled innocently with a Halo over his head.

Snorting **FIRE**, Mount Tsunade was about to tear him a new one just as Shizune walked into the office carrying 5 stacks of papers. Behind her Genma, the Immortal Chunin, Shikamaru, Ino, Choji and team Kurenai all walked in carrying over 50 piles of paperwork between them. Akamaru had a couple of piles balanced on his back and one on his head. The look he gave Naruto said he didn't appreciate being made a pack mule and held the Blonde personally responsible for this. The Commander & Chief simply looked at her assistant, as the flames increased at the sight of the new workload.

Said assistant chuckled nervously. "Naruto was eating Ramen at Ichiraku's with Choji for breakfast. Apparently he told Teuchi that he was feeling 'lucky' about his mission today. Unfortunately before Choji & Teuchi could restrain him under the **Emergency FUBAR Protocol**, Naruto **Body Flickered**. Choji immediately reported about what had happened, so I thought we may as well get started early." Shizune grimaced. "How bad is it this time?"

Tsunade tossed the **Mission Scroll** towards that Blonde bastard in front of her and immediately pulled out two bottles of Sake from her desk. Silently she handed the one second to Shizune, as all in the room except for Naruto Uzumaki winced.

Opening her bottle, Tsunade gave the room the damage report. "Should be a SOLO D Rank training Mission, for Infiltration & Information Gathering on a Civilian community within a limited time period. Technical difficulty ZERO, Enemy ZERO, Risk ZERO, actual C Rank **JUST** because its outside the Village Walls. In fact I was toying with the idea, to give it to one of the Academy students on a part-time basis to give them field experience, without the risk or worry with **ANY** problems going wrong at all. **HELL** a trained monkey could **NOT** fuck that **Mission Scroll** up. He also cached TonTon this time and closed his eyes when he picked it." Tsunade went for a cup ready to pour, when she sore her daily lottery ticket. "AND apparently. I have just won this week's JACKPOT lottery of 10 million Ryo."

As though the Blonde in the centre of the room had some kind of disease, everyone backed away from him and pressed themselves together against the wall.

A very insulted Naruto Uzumaki barked out. "I am not that bad!" Tsunade didn't even bother with the cup and just chugged straight from the bottle.

Shizune opened her bottle and paused to make her point. "The Wave Mission. C Rank though ended up as A Rank. Additional paperwork generated from that, was over TWO trees worth." Then proceeded to follow her teachers current example, chug, chug, chug, chug…..

The Ninja now on trial for FUBAR, snorted dismissively. "Please Me and Kakashi both knew that mission was messed up, before we even took it. The Old Man sent me there because he could not send a Jounin or ANBU unit to deal with it, because Tazuna lied with his request. On paper that was a C Rank request, so the Old Man could only justify sending a fresh out of the Academy Genin Squad to deal with it. Even though he **KNEW** Tazuna was lying out of his ass, before the Bridge Builder even made his request for the Leaf Village's help to FREE his people. I was sent on that mission to prevent FUBAR, not cause it. True the fact the Demon of the Mist & his Apprentice showed up, along with Gato having **TEN** times the number of thugs Intel suggested at the time. Was a 'technical' pooch screw, but I can hardly be held personally responsible for that. Besides the bridge still got built, a nation was freed from tyranny and **I** cleaned up that whole mess, including Gato and his thugs." The Hero nodded to himself, as if he had just proved his point.

Unperturbed the trail for the prosecution continued, Ino spoke this time. "The Chunin Exams." The Yamanaka's eyebrow was twitching.

The fellow Blonde retorted and mounted his defence. "It is **NOT** against the rulebook to send your Villages Jinchuuriki to compete in the Chunin Exams, when they are being held inside another's Village. I will have you actually know, we have the same Rights & Privileges as you do. Which are laid out under the **Five Villages & Nations Foundation Charter**, created by the First Kage's conference and Nations peace convention respectively. Participation by any of the Jinchuuriki, in any competition, hosted by any Village or Nation? Is Covered & Protected by Chapter 6 and Clauses 7a, 1b respectively once more. And of course let us all not forget my so called comrades, that most important Clause of all. When it actually comes to our line of work and chosen profession, the Shinobi Rule 1 Clause sh, **SHIT** HAPPENS. **IF** a full-scale army attacks our lands & homes or we find ourselves against overwhelmingly ridiculous odds. Then it's **MY** job to fight for and defend the Leaf Village & Fire Nation, from **ALL** threats regardless of whether they are both foreign OR domestic. It's all part of the gig that comes with having the World's most Irritable, Annoying and Largest Chakra Supply locked away into your gut, end of. As for your so called FUBAR and the Invasion in this supposed case, that was **SO** totally not my fault. If you want and need to blame someone for that, then blame Snake Face. It was his PLAN for World Domination and our destruction, **NOT** mine. Beside that one is a moot point at best, we were **ALL** involved with that Incident including you." The Blonde holding his new **Mission Scroll** nodded, as if to say so there.

Next witness. "The ferret?" Shikamaru spoke this time with a raised eyebrow.

Naruto Uzumaki pointed accusingly. "Actually that one was **YOUR** FUBAR Pineapple Boy, not mine. In this case I made the proposal to my squad, that we should have used standard Bait & Trap Tactics and have that Rat come to us. You were the Squad Captain for that Mission and it was YOUR plan, to Track & Pursue that Rat across the border into the Wind Nation. When that Continent Invasion force showed up by **SEA** I might add, it was just as much of a surprise to me as it was to you. I could hardly have just let Gaara fight them all off alone, now could I? We **DO** have a permanent alliance with the Sand Village & Wind Nation after all. Besides that whole new power source and end of the world prophecy, 'technical' pooch screw failed. Because I was there and actually did damage control for that one." Tsunade who was currently still chugging, snorted on her Sake.

Shikamaru Nara gave his cross examination and retort. "Yes by actually creating a black hole and sucking the Invading Army into it. Along with a Guy that was a wannabe God, in the middle of his takeover the world plan & speech. The target of the **ORIGINAL** Find & Capture Mission, AKA the Ferret, also got pulled into that FUBAR as well. The results of your so called damage control, was a destroyed Ancient & Forgotten underground Temple, reshaping a significant portion of the Wind Nations landscape and almost killing the target for a **LIVE** capture mission. C Rank Mission to find a lost pet outside the Village Walls, turned into S RANK troublesome FUBAR from the Bible." The Nara tactician, still had not worked that one completely out yet.

The FUBAR defendant, who currently had all eyes of the prosecution bearing down upon him.

Started to pull, a Hinata impersonation on the witness stand and poke his fingers together. "For the record I actually **DID** manage to both Save & Capture that Ferret at the time, during the 'technical' pooch screw in this particular case. In the end stuff like that is all just the unimportant details really anyway. The case for defence Stands & Rests by its mission track record, that has always ended up with a mission complete at the end of the day. Regardless of whether or not a unintended 'technical' and truly unforeseen pooch screw, may or may not occur during the carrying out of a Standard Mission. After all everyone one of us here & now present in this courtroom today, are all **NINJA**. When we were recruited for this job, we were **ALL** told "it's not a job, it's an adventure". Like I said before, in my opening statement made to Granny. I can handle anything believe it!" By now he was reduced to the size of a five year old, from the glare of his Commander & Chief.

Tsunade had just finished off the bottle and was gearing up for the eruption & execution.

"The given examples by your comrades so far, consumed a combine total of 67 trees just for instances alone. Let alone the political fallout & backlash that has reshaped the entire lands forever. Routinely you have more 'technical' pooch screws on a mission that is C Rank or less, than the rest of our entire Shinobi forces combined on A Rank missions and above. And those are the Missions even without the omens and signs. First you said you were felling 'lucky', when you had Ramen for breakfast. The last time that happened, was the Shion incident and you created a brand **NEW** Active Volcano. Next you actually catch TonTon, you **NEVER** catch TonTon. Third you closed your eyes and just picked what the fuck? And fourth I have won the JACKPOT, the FUCKING **JACKPOT** once that M**ission Scroll** was placed into your hands!" The courts occupants began to look at the innocent role of paper in Naruto Uzumaki's hands. Just as though it would set on fire and **KILL** them all before destroying the World.

Naruto Uzumaki shook his head like a five year old and gave his final defence. "Na Uh. You won the Jackpot when the paper was actually printed. You only noticed when this **Mission Scroll** was in my Hands and you thought the world was ending so you of course reached for the Sake. As for catching TonTon of course I did, because you have never thrown TonTon at me before today."

Insert "OINK!" Mount Tsunade was getting ready to blow and go nuclear.

So in for the Penny in for the preverbal Ryo. "I just think you use that whole lottery ticket omen, to scam Shizune into letting you drink when you should be working. After all Granny you **ARE** the Hokage now, which means you should set an example to your Shinobi. Besides if you spent less time drinking and more time actually doing your paperwork, then all this would have already been done by now." The defendant gesture to the mountain of paperwork, that the prosecution & witnesses had just brought in because of him.

Roaring Tsunade picked up the desk in front of her, as she hurled it straight at the witness stand. Naruto's eye bugged out, as he took the full force and brunt of the attack. As the lethal projectile struck the prisoner on death row, said prisoner exploded into smoke as the desk kept on going straight through the wall. Then the next, then the next, before exploding out of the other side of the Hokage Tower and sailing over the Leaf Village.

The Fifth Hokage's eyebrow was twitching, at the cloud of smoke in the centre of the room. "Bastard pulled another **Replacement Jutsu** with a Clone." Sighing Tsunade pinched the bridge of her nose once more. "Naruto out of all the missions you have ever taken for the Leaf Village, in all the different gigs and rolls that you have ever served in. Exactly how many started off as a C Rank Mission or below and **STAYED** a C Rank Mission or below? How many times have you handed in a mission report for a C Rank, that has not had a FUBAR in it regardless of mission successes?" Everyone in the room except for Tsunade, began to look around for the Blonde believing he had already left.

From above a voice answered. "I actually pulled a **Substitution Jutsu** when I jumped up to catch TonTon, a Clone stood trail in my place from start to finish. I was actually never **IN** danger or the line of fire." The original had watched the Kangaroo Court, from the safety of the ceiling. _"Being a Clone Sucks, SCREW __**YOU**__ BOSS!"_ Was its final thought, before being table fucked through FIVE solid walls. "And to answer your question. You know full well that I can neither confirm nor deny these charges under article 7 of the Leaf Village Shinobi Code. **NO** mission details whether past or active, maybe discussed after mission completion regardless of Rank or outcome. With anyone not involved, with the original assignment." Everyone was now looking up, to a smiling Uzumaki on the ceiling.

Tsunade had to admit, he was a Sly & Cunning little bastard to pull that move off at the beginning without her noticing it. The others all look dumbfounded, as Naruto simply dropped into a crouch before his Hokage. Then picked up the **Mission Scroll**, his Clone had just dropped before being permanently **fired**.

The Fifth sighed, as she sat back down in her chair. "Just be careful Brat. I still haven't decided whether you have the luck of the Devil, or he cursed you and tries to kill you on a daily basis."

Naruto snorted, as he walked towards the open window. "You know me Granny. Once you have faced down your first God or Wannabe, everything else becomes day to day after that including the FUBARS. You give me a mission regardless of rank and you can consider it done."

The Commander & Chief spoke. "Naruto one day that attitude of yours, is going to get you into more trouble than even **YOU** can actually handle." Everyone's luck runs out eventually.

Blonde stopped at the window, looking over his shoulder. "I already have that test we came up with, to know when I am seriously fucked this time. Usual stakes?" Naruto held up a coin, Tsunade nodded. Holding up the **Mission Scroll**, Naruto Uzumaki addressed the room. "Like I said, it's all part of the gig. When it comes to having the world's biggest freeloading pain in the ass, locked in your gut by your Idol & Hero. Besides this one may actual turn out to be a dud and I can have a mini vacation out of it. Err what is the Mission exactly?" Everyone swept dropped and Tsunade smacked her forehead when she realised, the Blonde had not actually even read that **Mission Scroll** he was holding yet.

Grinning a grin that was sooooooo not good for him, Tsunade gave him his new assignment. "Naruto Uzumaki, I the Fifth Hokage hereby send you on a C Rank Mission to go undercover in a High School."

Panicking the Blonde opened the Scroll to read the Mission Brief. "**NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!**" Everyone's luck runs out and then, **END** of the line.

* * *

_Presently High School Cafeteria._

"_SHIT! __**BAD**__ JUJU __**ALERT**__! That vision had very, VERY, __**VERY **__**BAD**__ mission JUJU! Almost put a Hex on this whole Kami dam thing! __**WARNING**__ must be handled with extreme caution & care! __**MUST**__ cleanse that __**Mission Scroll**__ of all Signs & Omens before officially taking it, believe it!"_

Ninja **ARE** extremely superstitious to Hex's by their very natures. **BAD** JUJU before the start of a Mission, had fucked up and ended many a Shinobi lives throughout history. That was why each Ninja had their own Signs, Omens and Rituals, to Ward Off or warn them of the Bad JUJU a coming. The most famous Sign & Omen in the Leaf Village, was of course the 'Legendary Suckers' losing streak. When Tsunade Senju won a bet, either you got the fuck **OUT** of the Fire Nation post haste or you ran straight to find one Naruto Uzumaki. As it seemed that no matter what came a knocking after that, be it Human, Monster, Demon or even a God. As long as the Blonde was around to ward off & face all that **VERY** bad JUJU. Then everything always turned out to be all right in the end, even with a true FULL SCALE **BIBLICAL** FUBAR or Invasion occurring.

Naruto Uzumaki had always used to joke, that if he ever lost a bet to Tsunade. The Ultimate Winner at chance, would know straight away just exactly how FUBAR the situation truly was based on the odds of the bet lost / won at the time. So the Blonde had made up his own Sign & Omen with his Commander & Chief, otherwise known as the popular heads or tails. A bet between The Ultimate Gambling Loser vs. The Ultimate Gambling Winner with odds set at 50/50. Each time a 'technical' pooch screw happened, Naruto Uzumaki filliped a coin and had called it 684 times in a row. Every Man, Women and Child in the World Of The Shinobi knew, that if Naruto Uzumaki, **THE** Naruto Uzumaki ever lost that bet. Then it would **NOT** matter whether you left the Fire Nation or the entire Elemental Nations altogether. Because the odds after that serving of **VERY ****BAD** JUJU, meant the world itself would probably be gone at the end of the week. So sliding a hand inside his pocket and touching a coin, Naruto Namikaze performed his personal Ritual to ward off all the Bad JUJU and make this Mission Official.

"_**I**__ Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze, Former ANBU Captain & Jounin of the Leaf Village hereby accept the Mission Lady Tsunade. Consider it done Granny, You can consider it done."_

Having settled the BAD JUJU situation back to **GOOD** Mission JUJU once more, the Blonde mentally returned back to his first ever DUD of C Rank Mission. It was just unfortunate that it carried a vacation period longer than originally wanted, all without his beloved Sacred Noodle and being surrounded by Fan Boys & Girls for eight hours a day. The Chakra Sensor once more began to ride that Shitstorm within, due to staring in this teen popularity contest & mellow drama going on around him.

All while trying very HARD not to **PUNCH** Ben & Angelia in the face, every time they tried to look at each other and the Blonde get that sensation of being poked in the back of the head. So pushing away & ignoring **ALL** his current Trails & Torments, along with that bitch Jessica Stanley. As she tried once more her goo-goo eyes attack again and batted her eyelashes, trying to get his focus & attention. Naruto decided to complete his Kakashi impersonation for the day and move to faze two of his current "ignore them all operation & strategy". Just as the Blondes hand reached for his next prop & weapon, something stroked the outer edge of his mind tenderly almost like a caress….

"_OHHHHH! __**YOU**__ have so __**GOT**__ to be fucking shitting __**ME**!__ Right fucking **NOW**__**?!**__"_

One year, almost one year since Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze had found himself in this new world. During which time, he had searched the earth looking for possible & viable threats, along with anything to do with weird shit only to find **SQUAT**. Now the moment he accepts a dream / nightmare mission, he gets mentally touched by another? The Blonde decided right then and there, that Tsunade was now right about the Devil cursing him and trying off him on a daily basis.

Immediately going into Ninja Mode, the Chakra Sensor let his needle spin and pendulum swing once more, to point the right direction to follow. Scanning the lunchroom with his peripheral vision, Naruto Namikaze actually cocked an eyebrow as something brushed against the outer limit of his body this time. Masking his surprise the Blonde placed himself on **FULL** Mental & Physical lockdown just in case, as his chakra needle gave him the direction of the incoming attacks. Looking at the windows to the outside world, the Ninja waited with baited breathe see what was coming his way this time. One extremely & mentally pissed **OFF** Ramen Junkie, who was without a next high of beloved Sacred Noodles dipped in broth flicked his eyes upward, towards the ceiling once more.

"_Listen __**UP**__ all you __**CRUEL**__ Bitches & Bastards up there! I know you can actually hear me and I __**KNOW**__ you are actually watching & listening to this. So first let me just say for the record, that the answer to that question you are __**ALL**__ currently asking yourselves right now? Is undeniably and unequivocally without any shadow of a doubt most certainly __**YES**__! __**I**__ am going to take this one, Very, VERY, __**VERY**__, __**VERY**__ personally, so make no fucking mistake about __**THAT**__! Second __**ALL**__ you cruel Bitches & Bastards up there had better start praying to yourselves and each other, because the __**NEXT**__ time we meet? Make __**NO**__ mistake about this! I __**WILL**__ take this one __**OUT**__ of each and every __**ONE**__ of your hides and then some! Third, __**KAMI**__ you had better start getting the paperwork ready to settle up __**MY**__ account with __**YOU**__, in the 'Grand Scheme' of things. Because __**I**__ intend to personally __**COLLECT**__ very soon! __**ALL**__ you Fuckers __**HAD**__ BETTER __**BELIEVE **__**IT**__!"_

So after redrawing his current Tactical Position & battle lines, with the powers that be upstairs. The Blonde began to assess the full extent of this latest 'technical' pooch screw, the good folks around here had just decided to cast his way. That was when Naruto Namikaze had first saw them, as she passed the glass and walked along the windows towards the door.

* * *

**Jutsu Outlines.**

_**Shadow Clones.**_

If you need this to be explained, then you are soooooooo reading the wrong story.

_**Rasengan**_.

Moron B see above.

_**S Rank. Shadow Transformation Jutsu**__._

Naruto's personal transformation Jutsu, that is an actual physical shift **NOT** an illusion. He can assume any form he wishes, within a physical limit of Size & Mass. Anything as small as a Kunai, to something as large as twice his size. The further away from his original body size & structure and the more complex the shape is i.e., claws, wings, twelve legs. The more Chakra & Concentration is required to maintain that particular form, shortening the time period Naruto can hold it for exponentially. Something human, i.e. one of his AVATAR identities Child / Male / Female. Is nothing more than a change of clothes to him and is reflected as such in its Chakra usage.

Because of this Naruto tends to have is **Shadow Clones** perform none human transformations. Because they are Chakra Constructs and they have no Biological component to physical shift. So maintaining an animal or none human form, is far easier for them and reflected as such in Chakra usage and time limits.

_**S Rank. Demonic Viewing Forest Of Corpses**_.

Is a shared mindscape between Caster and Target. Using a Physical Chakra connection (Touch), the Caster pulls the target of the Genjutsu into an artificially created mindscape. The Forrest environment confuses the senses & disorientates and each tree acts as a resonance pillar to continuously project the intended sensations to the Target i.e. Fear, Terror or Killing intent. The Illusion can be altered to include Monsters, Dead Bodies etc. But the Forest environment is set and the Key to the stability of the Illusion. The effect can be increased or decline based upon the amount of Chakra placed within the Physical Connection. Amount of Chakra is the Key factor, **NOT** Chakra Control.

Its weakness is physical contact must be kept & maintained between Target & Caster, otherwise the Illusion is broken.

The effects can also be intensified or toned down, by using either Ying or Yang Chakra (Light or Dark). Developed for Psychological Torture, to break a prisoner based on noise & sense bombardment from all sides. Jenks got a small taste of LIGHT and almost had an heart attack from it. Ibiki got a full **BLAST** of both Naruto's and Kurama's DARK.

_**Ibiki's Law 3:16**__._

_Incidentally be warned, Ibiki Morino still has standing orders issued to __**ALL**__ Passed & Current Members of the Leaf Village's ANBU Division. To Immediately & Permanently __**BLACK BAG**__ your ass, if the words "Teddy Bear" and "Picture" are used within the same breath & sentence. _

_Victims so far 21 and a half._

_Turns out the "Devil In Orange" wanted a memento to admire his handy work by. It took him twenty-one attempts to find those photo's._

**BOTH** **Shadow Transformation Jutsu** and **Demonic Viewing Forest Of Corpses** are S Rank due to.

Chakra consumption = Unless you are a 'Chakra Monster', then you will die if you even attempt them regardless of Jutsu success.

Due to effect = **Shadow Transformation Jutsu** cannot be detected or dispelled like its illusionary counterpart. Because of this it can beat all standard Shinobi Security counter measures. It's an Infiltration & Assassin specialists wet dream Jutsu and a targets worst nightmare.

Due to effect = **Demonic Viewing Forest Of Corpses, **when used in combination with a Tailed Beast Chakra? Just simply fucks you up. _Ibiki Morino, proud Sensei of my little Hellion & Protégé._

_**Chakra Resonance**__._

Naruto Senju Uzumaki Namikaze's Senor & Awareness Ability. Naruto has the capability to Sense & Feel all fluctuations within **ALL** life-force around himself, through experience within his own Body & Soul.

Quick version of Explanation = you get pissed, **HE** gets pissed too because your anger resonates within him and makes **HIS** anger rise up, NOT yours.

Long Version after that of Explanation = Armageddon in this world if Naruto actually losses it and goes FULL BLOWN Chakra Demon / Nuclear on it. Pretty much the best outcomes of such a scenario, are outlined in the **LAST** chapter of the Bible. Which is why the Chakra Sensor, **MUST** routinely purge his Emotional & Bloodlust Cycles otherwise **GAME OVER**.

As there are different aspects to Chakra, Naruto can switch between resonance frequencies like looking at the world in Black & White or Infrared, Ultraviolent, Colour etc. However Naruto can only look at one particular Frequency at a time and his default is always Negative & Positive emotions / Instincts from **ALL**** LIFE** around himself.

* * *

**Omake****. **Ramen Tuesday**.**

**ANBU File 2359/H/9216/E.**

_Author._

Ibiki Morino, Head Of the ANBU Torture & Interrogation Division.

_Brief Introduction Summary._

As Head of the ANBU T & I division, I pride myself on being able to tell the difference between Fact and Fiction. In my line of work, that difference **COULD** always mean the lives of either my Direct Subordinates or fellow Comrades. After working in this Field for so long, I have heard most of the so called "Bogey" stories that have ever floated around the Leaf Village over the years. As a child I had heard many times the "Bogey Story" of a confrontation between Madara Uchiha and Lady Mito Uzumaki, which lead to the First Hokage passing a special law called **Hokage Law 21**. **NEVER** did I believe such a story held any merit as **FACT** and neither did I believe that such a law actually existed.

_**Hokage Law 21**__**.**_

_**NO**__ sane or insane Citizen of Konoha be they Civilian, Ninja, Clan Member or Council Member are Immune from the consequences of their __**OWN**__ actions. If said Citizen ever violates in anyway, a __**SINGLE**__ portion of Ramen before any member of the Uzumaki Clan. Said Member of the Uzumaki Clan, may use any and __**ALL**__ means necessary including the Sacred Spoon to avenge the Sacred Noodles without punishment. Even in the event of the Mental Scaring, Disfigurement, Dismemberment or even Death of the perpetrator involved._

_The First Hokage Hashirama Senju, Juggernaut of the Shinobi, God of The Forrest and Witness & Husband of a __**VERY**__ pregnant Mito Senju Uzumaki._

Three nights ago I was tasked by the Third Hokage to investigate a disturbance within the Market Quarter of the Leaf Village, at one Ichiraku Ramen Stand. However before the Third Hokage dispatched my squad that evening, he looked VERY grim and reminded me of **Hokage Law 21**.

As Head of the ANBU T & I division, I have Seen & Done many things that most People would claim as Horrors or even War Crimes. I have always taken these actions in the name of the Leaf Village and not as a means of self-gratification in anyway. However the incident that I investigated 3 nights ago made me physically sick, when I arrived upon that scene and saw that final action of one Naruto Uzumaki.

Detailed inside this FILE is the Boys own accounts word for word, at what happened and why he did it. There is no mental scan of the Victim, as Interrogator Inoichi Yamanaka refused to enter the subjects mind. After personally witnessing the Uzumaki Clan members second action, when the Sacred Spoon left the hand of one Naruto Uzumaki.

With no evidence to suggest that Naruto Uzumaki was unprovoked into an act of self-defence under **Hokage Law 21**. I have no choice but to dismiss any Criminal Charges against the sole member of the Uzumaki Clan at this time.

_Addendum__._

I Ibiki Morino Head of the ANBU Torture & Interrogation division, here bye nominate Naruto Uzumaki for a position within the ANBU Forces of the Leaf Village. This recommendation is also supported by Inoichi Yamanaka and all of the Interrogators within ANBU that investigated the now named event of Ramen Tuesday. Although the Boy is Young and under the age of 5, we believe that given recent witnessed events. Naruto Uzumaki has a bright future in the Field of Torture & Interrogation. Just as long as we can teach him to ask questions, before he pulls out the Sacred Spoon.

Furthermore we recommend that the protection detail now posted on Naruto Uzumaki, be moved to the Ichiraku Family and their Business. As they will be our **ONLY** hope for the future of the Leaf Village, if someone else ever decides to break **Hokage Law 21**.

* * *

**General Answers To Some Posted Reviews For ****Twilight Ninja**.

_Review_ by **Iammer16**. love it so far cant wait for the cullens to come in fully. Also will Bella have Edward's mind reading ability or just her mind shielding ability like in the cannon books

_**My Answer**_ = In short Bella has the Mind Reading, Naruto has the Mental Shield. That is **WHY** I posted my Authors Introduction at the beginning along with the prologue, as it lays out the Vampire Powers & Rules **SET** for them.

_Review_ by **Jebest4781**.this was fun and will get interesting on Naruto meeting the Cullen Clan

_**My Answer**_ = While some **MAY** call this a filler chapter, **I** personally do not. As Naruto Cannon and **MY** Naruto are basically **TWO** different people with the same name. A story needs a starting point and that is what this chapter is. It's **MY** Naruto Namikaze starting point, for his current Skill Level & Restrictions, along with his Mental & Emotional mind state for the future of this story.

It also lays out a few key points for the future, such as his **Chakra Resonance** ability and his Physical & Mental defences. Which of course **WILL** play an important role, for future from now on during this story. I will not be doing this for the Vampires, as the Characters have already been well established through Twilight Cannon.

As for the **FUN**, of course! I LOVE **GOOD** humour, both in what I am personal writing and also what I am reading.

_Review_ by **sanabalis**. Nice story, I'm enjoying it very much! I'm just surprised that there's no ramen. I mean, isn't that standard student food all over America. Not to mention normal stuff in Japan? Also, even if there's no ramen, it shouldn't be too difficult for him to make some from scratch. Keep up the great work!

_**Naruto Uzumaki's PESRONAL Answer to this, BELIEVE IT!**_

This one goes out to those of **YOU**, who have recently suggested that Ramen, **MY ****NINJA**** RAMEN** could actually exist here in this World in one form or another. To me you **ARE** so obviously **LOST**, Tormented and **VERY** Deluded Souls. That do not know the difference between the Sacred Noodles dipped in broth and that VERY **BITTER** **CRAP** that gets sold here wholesale! Fucking **BELIEVE ****IT**!

Do you really think that I, **THE** Naruto Uzumaki have not considered those possibilities already that have been suggested here? I have searched every continent within these lands, searched even the deepest and most remote corners of this Cursed & Barren wasteland of Earth. **ALL** to not find even a trace be it spice or bread, of the beloved gift that **KAMI** herself once bestowed upon my Clan.

To even **TRY** and give me false hope like this and **THEN**, compare NINJA **RAMEN** to that **CRAP** sold in this World? In accordance with **Hokage Law 21** and for your crimes against the Uzumaki Clan along with Sacred Noodle….

**KURAMA**** BRING ME ****THE**** SACRED SPOON!**

**I** have Cruel Bastards, Bitches and **HEATHENS** to track down and teach about messing with my Pain, Suffering, Torment, Greif and Misery!


End file.
